These were done as the show went on and submitted when it was over. There wasnt enough wrasslin fans on at the time so I figured I would just do it all in one post...
Cruiserweight Match
- Kid Kash looks like a smaller version of Owen Hart. I like what he brings to the table from a cruiserweight look.
- Paul London is fucking NASTY !! How in the holy hell did they break up him and Kidman. He draws first "Holy Shit" chant of the night with a perfect shooting star press to the outside of the ring.
- Oh sick Brainbuster by Kash.
-Yikes Nunzio really is the smallest wrestler ever.
- Still a ton of empty seats in the joint.
- Jamie Noble is impressive in the first match I have seen him in.
- Gregory Helms win the Cruiserweight Championship with a nice Shining Wizard to Funaki. He sooooooooo belongs on Smackdown with the rest of the cruisers.
This was just a way to get Helms on SD. Kash should win it back soon enough.
Teddy Long/Vince/Divas Segment
Apparently they are doing a cough cough "random lottery".
Witty couple of one liners by HHH. "Torrie will you open your box for me?" and Candance "Will you hold my ball?"
Slightly amusing.......key word slightly.
Mickie James vs. Ashley Trish as Referee.
Mickie James is THICK.
She loves Trish now apparently........ugh. end this.....Thank god for Tivo.
-Trish is super super cute in her ref outfit. Man, she just gets better looking by the day. (And she was hot to begin with)
-Man, this match is going to be sloppier than Jenna Jamesons private parts.
-Ashley should be valeting for someone. NOT WRESTLING. She is super over with the fans, but she CANT WRESTLE !!! Let her do house shows against other women wrestlers, but have her just valet on Raw. This way she stays on tv, doesnt have to go to the minors and gets some much needed experience.
- I dont think anyone is noticing how bad this match is because they just look at Trish.
- What is bad is that Ashley looks better than Mickie here. Isnt Mickie supposed to have some experience?
- This match is about twice as long as I thought it would be....
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-Ashleys head bounced right off the canvas. Not a good bump, she probably got pretty banged up there.
Mickie gets the reluctant 3 count for the win. She spazzes out on Trish. Very annoying,
Lottery Segment
Big Show and Rey are best friends now apparently... gay.
Rey looks like he drew 1 by the expression.
JBL vs. Boogeyman
JBL is lead to the ring by Jillians boobs. My god thats all you see when you look at her.
- Dead serious. Boogeyman has the entrance that any wrestler would DREAM of having. Why can't they come up with shit like this more often?
- Man if only he could wrestle like he could delivering an entrance. I freaking love that dances freak shit. Its so good honestly. Get rid of the worms though.
- Jillians face is normal now.
- JBL is acting flat out freaked out by JBL until he finally comes in.
- Boogeyman is taking a beating by still manages to get a couple Boogeymoves in.
-OMG!!!! How bad of a match was that. Not one offensive move by Boogeyman. He hits the only move I have seen him do. The Pump Handle Slam and gets the 3 count for the win.
-JBL was the WWE Champion for 10 months...................
Lottery Segment
- MNM always look all greasy. Drop the fur.
- All the picks have been made.
Wait the Royal Rumble Match is next???????
Spirt Squad segment
I have absolutely NO idea what to make of these guys. There fucking hilarious and embarrasing at the same time.
YEAH YEAH YEAH SPIRIT SQUAD !!!!!
Royal Rumble Match........
1.
HHH gets the first pick. I had earlier thought it was Rey, but HHH gets the call. I still think he wins this one and reclaims his spot at the top of the card going into Mania. No doubt about it.
2. Ok, close enough.
Rey is number 2. Rey comes out in Eddie Lowrider. Crowd pops. Nice tribute. Another possible winner here. Rey going into Mania could work actually.
Rey using good strategy by bouncing off the middle rope instead of the top rope. Cool little quirk.
3.
Simon Dean comes out in the Lark thing. HHH looks on as Dean beats on Rey. HHH is like 'your an idiot' They both toss Dean out then go after each other again. Eddie chants begin.
4.
Psicosis is out now. Goes right after Rey. I dont know why, but I have always really liked this guy. I would push him much higher up the ranks. He has been ripping through Rey and HHH but is eliminated with a Hurricanana.
5. Wooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! Here comes
Naitch. HHH says bring it on. Crowd is going NUTS for Flair!! Mostly Flair, Rey is out in the corner resting. Flair is eliminated.
(Rey and HHH currently in the ring)
6. Well Its
The Big Show. HHH is like FUUUUCK. Big Show beats the piss out of HHH for a while, then moves onto Rey. I really dont see Show getting eliminated before the next guy comes out like everyone else.
7.
The Coach......Please.....this was only done so he didnt crowd the booth. He will get tossed here. Biggest "you suck" chant of the night. Coach is tossed by Show. Big Show has been kicking ass so far. All offense.
8. Oooooooh.
Lashley. This should be good. I think he should do well in this Rumble is they know what is good for them. Stare down by Show and Lashley. Show drops Lashley. Holy crap. That was some weird ass move by Lashley, like a really fast backdrop. I have never seen that before.
9. Here comes
Kane. Lashley knows he is in for some trouble now for picking on Show. Lashley tries to show off and Kane boots him. Lashley does look good though. He is on fire now.
(Lashley, HHH, Rey, Show, Kane in the ring)
10.
Slyvan. What a loser. Gone by Lashley. Double chokeslam by Kane and Show and toss Lashley out. So much for him. Kane and Show laugh and agree to beat each other down. What is stupid about this is that they are tag champs, but fucking HHH and Rey are just sitting there. Oh yup, then HHH gets them both out.
(Rey and HHH only in the ring.....See where this is going?)
11.
Carlito. Man, he bores the snot out of me. I dont know why, he is pretty good I guess. There really should be more people in the ring.
12.
Chris Benoit. Man, I thought he retired. He is so good, why isnt he main event? HHH and Benoit enchange for a while on the ropes. These guys work great together. They really arent showing enough of the ring. Its hard to tell where anyone is.
13.
Booker T comes out all smiles. I dont expect him too........ok he was just tossed before I could even finish that line.
(Benoit, HHH, Carlito, Rey in the ring. 23 minutes into it)
14.
Joey Mercury w/Melina. He will get tossed soon. This seems to be a main event invite only match.
15.
Tatanka. Haha. Everyone just stops wrestling and stares at him like everyone in the audience did. Tomahawk Chop breaks out. That is the worst mullet I have EVER seen in my life. He actually looks in decent shape.
16.
Johnny Nitro w/Melina. See these guys wont act like idiots like Kane and Show. They will actually WORK TOGETHER. Imagine a tag team actually doing that? What a concept. I should trademark that.
17.
Trevor Murdoch. What a stupid stupid looking man.
(Nitro, Mercury, Rey, HHH, Benoit, Murdoch, Carlito in the ring)
18.
Eugene.....uuugh. Just when we thought this gimmick was dead and buried. Mysterio with a sweet move to Murdoch and Eugene off a Eugene airplane spin
19. Whhhhhhhhhhhhhat a rush.
Animal. Just kinda a mess in the ring here.
20.
RVD come out to a HUGE pop. RVD Chant is loud. He goes after everyone. He should be going after Carlito. RVD has been tearing though people and eliminates Animal.
21.
Orlando Jordan comes out to crickets and fireflys. RVD Chants start again. Aren't we in Miami? Are they a 'smart' crowd? I thought they just came to see the Rock.
(Carlito, Rey, HHH, MNM, Eugene, shit......everyone but Animal....)
22.
Chavo. Will he and Rey work together? Eddie Chants. Chavo goes right after Rey. I just dont get that shit. Faces should be working together man. Wrestling 101. It should only come down to every man for himself when there are only faces left.
23.
Matt Hardy. He wont last long with that injury. He should be resting. Why is Tatanka still in the ring? Ok, Tatanka just got tossed. I missed Chavo getting tossed. They said HHH did it.
24.
Super Crazy. Details get a little messy here as there are like 12 people in the ring here.
25.
Shawn Michaels. Big Pop. haha. HBK takes out like 10 guys before getting slowed down by 3 guys. HBK eliminated Murdoch.
26.
The Masterpiece Chris Masters. I am sold on this dude 100% now. 23 years old and a good worker. I'll take it. Hardy almost eliminates HHH twice.
27.
Viscera. Full purple silk pajamas. That must be hard to work with. Vis eliminates Hardy.
28.
Shelton Benjamin comes out with Big Mama. Benoit takes out Eugene.
29.
Goldust. Man. WWE. Make up you mind with this poor guy. The only 3 black guys in the ring are beating on each other.
30.
Randy Orton. Goes right after Benoit and eliminates him. Masters eliminates Masters and Carlito eliminates a celebrating Masters.
So weak. RVD misses a heel kick and Goldust has to sell it to become eliminated. Bet we dont see any replays of that. OJ got bounced by someone at the same time.
MNM go after HBK. MNM working well as a team this whole match. Nitro and Mercury bounced by HBK.
(HHH, HBK, Carlito, RVD, Shelton, Rey, Orton left in the ring.)
Shawn Michaels eliminates Shelton. I forgot to mention that Shelton promised Vince that he would personally eliminate HBK. Cue Vince......
Shano Mac tosses out HBK while HBK argues with Vince. ok.......
RVD eliminates Carlito.
(HHH, Rey, Orton and RVD left)
Rey and RVD agree to team up and do some sweet tag team shizzle together. Rey then sorta kinda accidently eliminates RVD.
Now HHH and Randy look at each other like two cats to a mouse.
Rey catches both guys with a 619 but is quickly taken down by HHH.
Now it appears to be every man for himself. Oh snap. HHH gets eliminated by Rey. I didnt see that coming.
(Rey and Orton left)
Cheap shot by HHH on Rey after HHH's elimination.
Royal Rumble Winner: Rey reverse hurricarana tosses Orton out. Who woulda thunk it?
Post Match. Edge interupts Rey congrats from friends by saying "Dont plan on using that loophole that your buddy Benoit used. There will be no happy endings."
I love the idea of Rey on Raw, but he seems like such a Smackdown guy.
John Cena vs. Edge.
Damn, that was quite the entrance by Cena. Lights, Streamers, Fireworks, Huge Ramp above the other ramp that jumps right into the ring. Man, I like this guy soooooo much better when he IS NOT the champion. You dont have to be champ to be over. The sooner the WWE realizes that the better off they will be.
Why in the world wouldnt this be the main event? At least we are a little unsure about who will win this one. Angle/Henry is about as predictable as where the sun is coming up tomorrow.
Great Cena wins. I am so happy. Ratings will skyrocket and sarcasm will reign supreme.
This is a very poor decision by the writing staff.
Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry.
I really dont want to watch this but I will....and I love watching Kurt Angle so do the math.
Kurt Angle wins the most predictable match of all time. Whoopie.
Ok, here we go. Taker hits the scene.
Back to 1996. Lighting and stuff. Taker spooks Angle and the show is over.
Overall I thought it was a very good PPV. They should have saved the Rumble for the main event and Edge should have gone over, but what the hell. Its just TV.
Linear Mode
