I have had this on my hard drive for a very long time now, so it may be a bit outdated and as much as i would like to claim it as my own work.. sadly it isnt. I cant remember the web site I got it from, it was many months ago... anyway..
YOU KNOW YOU WATCH TOO MUCH WRESTLING IF...
1)In your resume you write"I'm the best there is,the best there was,and the best there ever will be."
2)Everytime Something Doesn't Go Your Way, You Say, "What About Me"
3)You call a beer by your name.
4)You begin to shake someones hand in public but then hesitate to look for the crowds response.
5)You tell your significant other,"not tonight,i'm watching raw".
6)Everytime you sit down at a table you wonder how easily it might break if you were to moonsault it.
7)You throw a coke at Eric Bischoff/nwo and it hits the tv screen.
8)You whistle the dx theme song during sex.
9)You giggle every time someone says they've got a "job"to do.
10)On your job resume you put your residence as "parts unknown".
11)You constantly deny that Brian Christopher is your son.
12)After you beat someone up you spray paint there back.
13)You chokeslam your cat.
14)You clothsline people in the supermarket for no real reason.
15)You elbow smash your dog and turn him/her over for the three count.
16)You do heel turns on your best friends for no reason.
17)You don't understand why there are wars when a steel-cage/grudge match would settle everything.
18)Instead of reading your kids a bedtime story, you put them in a sleeper.
19)When you put your kids to bed,you tell them to"rest in peace".
20)You powerbomb your mom threw the dinner table.
21)You get fired from work,then show up the next day wearing a mask.
22)You are refereeing a sporting event and just as someone is cheating you turn your head.
23)Leno 1-0 who's next.
24)The Only Words You Got Right On You Spanish Test Were "Viva La Raza"
25)Every Time You Use A Tooth Pick You Throw It In Someone's Face
26)Whenever You Beat Someone At A Sporting Event, You Call Them A Jobber
27)When Your Dog Is Barking, You Run Outside And Put It In The Torture Rack
28)You Make Signs Like "GoldBerg Is My Dad" When You Watch Nitro At Home
29)Every Year For Halloween You Dress Up Like Ric Flair, Do his Walk and Shout WHOOOOOO
30) Anytime You Wrestle With Your Friends You Try To Put Them In The Figure 4
31)When Anyone Asks For Directions And You Point "Down There"
32)Your greatest moment in life was when the nWo was created and you have it documented in a college paper with legitimate sources.
33)You call all hispanic people luchadors
34)You insist on spelling nWo with the W capitalized
35)When some one asks you why you wont do something you say "Cause Stone Cold said so"
36)In history class, when asked for important dates..you give the date of all wwf title history
37)When ever anyone critizes hollywood hogan, you imediatly say "he's not hulk anymore"
38)When In a fight you get down on two knees and beg the other guy not to hit you and then you nail him with a low blow
39)You brag about all the wrestling terminology you know whenever you can
40)You have contests with your friends while watching wrestling who can name all the Wrestlers' moves
41)You never knew public enemy was named after a rap group
42) When watching a fight you try to make every punch into a wrestling move..."oh...he could have done a neck breaker there" "why the hell didn't you give him a pile driver?"
43) When the road dog does michael buffer you complain about their voices sounding nothing alike"
44)Whenever your favorite guy wrestles...you start yelling to the tv...mcmahon why the hell did you make him job
45)You give your teacher the middle finger
46)You kick your teacher in the stomach and give her the stunner
47)You shave your head to get a bigger "push"
48)When anyone says the name of any wrestler you immediatly give height, weight, and finisher
49)You walk into church and high five people in the pews as you walk down the aisle.
50)You purposly blade yourself while shaving.
51)Everytime you see an Elvis impersonator, you ask for his autograph and get upset when it's not signed "Honkey Tonk Man"
52)You attack your friends from behind with a chair, and look around the room, waiting for crowd reaction.
53) You shake someone's hand, you pause and hesitate, while looking around nervously.
54)You walk up to get your diploma, and the graduation song is playing, you turn to the audience and shout "OOOOOOHHHHH YEEEEAAAAHHH!" and bite a Slim Jim.
55) You won't come out of your room until your parent's play your theme on the stereo.
56)You Leapfrog over people while playing football, then turn around and clothesline them.
57) Everytime you go to church, you wait for the minister to quote something from the Book Of Austin.
58)You have wrestling tournaments with your stuffed animals.
59)Everytime a teacher's pet passes by your desk, you mumble "Lousy Babyface" and stick your foot out to trip him.
60)Everytime you walk pass someone lying down, you feel the sudden urge to strap them in a Sharpshooter.
61)Everytime you come in contact with a roll of duct tape, you wrap it tightly around your wrist.
62)Your teacher gives you detention, you give them a Stone Cold Stunner and walk out of class, flashing your middle finger.
63)Your children are named "Crippler"; "Hitman"; and "Hollywood".
64)You get hoarse on purpose so you can sound like the Macho Man.
65)You hold a wrestling tournament for an aluminum foil belt.
66)You constantly play really bad air guitar on your foil belt that you cheated to win.
67)On Halloween, you pull a Jericho and steal all the trick-or-treaters' masks and then claim them as "prizes".
68) You get kicked off the school wrestling team for choke-slamming your opponent.
69)You cried when the Giant went nWo.
70)You get in fights with people who say wrestling is fake.
71)After your parents ground you for a week, you refer to them as"heels".
72)You try to write to the admissions office at S.C.U.
73)You try to impress your friends by telling them Bobby Heenan jokes.
74)You think "No Holds Barred" should win an Oscar.
75) Your greatest accomplishment in life is mastering the sleeper hold.
76)You roped in your backyard and you get together with friends to throw chairs around.
77)You requested "3:16" as your new license plate.
78)You put white-out on the faces of your action figures, and then drawblack marks on their faces.
79)You think your Uncle is Eric Bischoff
80)After winning in golf, you spear your opponent and yell "Who's Next?".
81)You think that the history of the nWo should be included in your World History class.
82)You wonder why Scott Hall's survey was never on Family Feud.
83)You didn't win the "Employee of the Month" award so you hit the winner with a chair and then strut.
84)You sell a pint of your blood to buy a case of Slim Jims.
85)You challenge Chavo Guerrero to a Loser Gives Up Tacos For A Year Match.
86)You wear your "Eddie Guerrero Is My Favorite Wrestler" T-Shirt to your sisters formal wedding.
87)You buy your dad the same hair piece Mean Gene almost wears.
88)You tattoo your favorite stuffed animal to match Saturn's tattoo's.
89)You believe Eric Bischoff really "loves you."
90)You know "Friends Don't Let Friends watch WCW."
91)You know NITRO is hazardous to your health.
92)You can tell "Is it live or is it Memorex" when cheers for Goldberg are heard.
93)You would be willing to go on a date with any member of The Flock.
94)You would take a chair shot to the head to protect Hollywood Hogan from it.
95)You join Hell's Angels just to make sure you get a ringside seat at Road Wild this summer in Sturgis, ND.
96)You think the answer to "What's for dinner?' is a package of Slim Jims.
97)You wonder if The Giant ever caught Jack and got his Golden Goose back.
98)You want Kevin Nash to start using his real name ...Diesel.
99)You swear "Arribe La Racha" means "Eric loves you."
100)You drink a glass of Juvi Juice every morning.
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