TNA iMPACT! Results - June 8, 2006
Credit: BC From Lordsofpain.net
VIDEO PACKAGE: KOTM Qualifiers
- Recap of last week's hellacious Jarrett/Raven match + preview of this week's Sting/Steiner match.
PROMOS: STING/SCOTT STEINER & JEFF JARRETT
- Sting mocks Steiner's speech and promises victory.
- Steiner & Jarrett (WITH BORASH~!) backstage get psyched up for the match.
- Jarrett wants Steiner in KOTM3 with him at Slammiversary... even though it's every man for himself.
- Mike Tenay & Don West hype the match up even more. Is it hot in here or just me?
KOTM QUALIFYING MATCH: SCOTT STEINER with Gail Kim vs. STING
- So much for this being the main-event... unless it goes 56 minutes. Shudder.
- How many mid-match commercial breaks would that be?
- Sting's punches hit so hard, they cause concussions!
- Out of the ring, Steiner goes ass over elbows on the guard rail.
- CHAIR SHOT TO THE ASS~! It's pandermonium!
- L.A.X.' protests would probably get more attention if they held them at the English announce table.
- However, they're still there, along with Moody Jack.
- The fight returns to the ring... commercial?! A TNA first!
- DX returns at Vengeance, I guess. :-/
- Back and Steiner is in command. STEINERLINE!
- BCv1 Note For Pre-1992 Fans: Steinerline is just a clothesline.
- Scott hooks on the Crippler CrossFace.
- Sting's hand drops once...
- Twice...
- Thr... NO! He's not done yet!
- Steiner kills any dream of a Sting comeback with a suplex.
- Scott breaks out the PUSH-UPS.
- Scott props Sting up top, but Stinger fights out and hits a flying Steinerline.
- BCv1 Note: Still a clothesline, only flying.
- Second rope splash gets Sting the deuce.
- Stinger Splash! Earl Hebner pulled in the way! Catastrophe!
- Gail Kim's in! She's on Sting's back!
- Sting throws her off... but Jeff Jarrett runs in and hits the Stroke!
- "Slick" Johnson out for the count... but STING KICKS OUT!
- Sting escapes from the triple suplexes.
- Jarrett holds him in position for a running Steinerline.
- BCv1 Note: Still just a clothesline, only running.
- Sting ducks! Steiner levels Jarrett!
- Roll-up. Sting's got it...
- But Jarrett breaks up the pin, causing the DQ.
- Sting is declared the final KOTM entrant.
- Jarrett is pissed. More pissed than Steiner... who's actually not in it.
- Jarrett attacks Sting... but Ron Killings is out for the save!
- Abyss is out for the save after the save and joins Steiner & Jarrett for a little three-on-two.
- Christian Cage is out because there was a sale on run-ins, I guess. :-/
- Cage, Sting and Truth fight off Jarrett, Abyss & Steiner.
- Steiner grabs a mike and calls the finish crap.
- He wants in KOTM3 and he's not leaving until he gets it.
- Steiner's protesting in the ring... but Samoa Joe is up next!
- Back after a break, Steiner's still in the ring.
- Chasyn Rance is out for his scheduled match with Joe, but Scott tells him to get.
- BCv1 Note: Chasyn Rance is a Florida-based independent wrestler MLW fans might remember him as "the straight-edge referee".
- Ah, those were the days...
- Joe's music hits and the crowd erupts!
- Joe goes toe-to-toe with Big Poppa Pump... and gets a shove in the face!
- Oh, you know Joe ain't takin' that shit.
- About 250 security guys run out to break up the brawl. I guess there was a sale on rent-a-cops too.
- They can't seem to break 'em up, but finally they get pulled apart.
VIDEO PACKAGE: KEVIN NASH & ALEX SHELLEY
- It's a Paparazzi Production, filmed via ShelleyCam in a hotel room.
- Nash explains that getting Chris Sabin to agree to a Slammiversary match was just the first part of his plan.
- The second part occurs next week.
- Nash asks Shelley to find "a Sabin clone" to help him warm-up...
- In a SIZE MATTERS ON A POLE MATCH!
- Smell the Russo.
- Next week, Nash makes his X-Division debut.
PROMO: LARRY ZBYSZKO
- Zbyszko (& BORASH!) explains that he just can't make a Steiner/Joe match for Slammiversary that simply.
- Um... why?
- Slick Johnson runs by and says a decision on the matter will be made within the hour.
- Zbyszko says he needs more time, but Johnson says the new face of TNA management will decide for him.
MATCH: SONJAY DUTT vs. JERRELLE CLARK
- The match is totally overshadowed by Konnan taking over the broadcast booth.
- Konnan makes a ton of claims, including the X-Division is a rip-off of lucha libre, as is the six-sided ring, which he calls an "octagon".
- He's upset that Shocker was sent back to Mexico after "tearing the roof off" at Sacrifice.
- I think the internet term for that was a "Haas pop".
- Konnan rambles through the entire match, which itself is actually decent.
- I'm not much for "star ratings", but I'd give it a solid 26 out of 41 stars.
- Sonjay avoids the 630 and hits a standing shooting star for the pinfall.
- Boo Konnan for effectively ruining the first 26-star match in 2006.
PROMO: TEAM 3D
- Brother Ray & Brother Devon are at Viking Hall, the ECW Arena.
- They beat WWECW there by a few weeks.
- They say they'll bring South Philly down south and go extreme on The James Gang.
- I'm actually shocked they went all the way to Philadelphia for a segment this short.
MATCH: TEAM CANADA with Scott D'Amore vs. CHRIS SABIN & THE JAMES GANG
- Before the match, The James Gang promise to go to the bingo hall and make it famous.
- A1 & Bobby Roode are both dropped by B.G. James before he tags in Kip.
- Roode trades leapfrogs with Kip before eating a dropkick.
- Eric Young gets gorilla pressed by Kip.
- Kevin Nash & Alex Shelley appear on the balcony to scout Sabin who's schooling ol' E.Y.
- Mid-match commercial.
- Back to action as Tenay slips in the mention that Impact is at midnight next Thursday. Sigh.
- Team Canada is dominating Sabin... but he makes the hot tag to B.G. behind the ref's back.
- The tag doesn't count and D'Amore hocks a big loogie on Sabin's face. Nasty!
- Not "rub your face on my bare asscheeks" nasty, but still...
- Crowd cheers Sabin on as he struggles to survive the Bobby Roode Chinlock Of Severe Discomfort.
- A1 rib breaker sets up an E.Y. Savage-style elbow. OHHH YEEEEEAH!
- Sabin fights back, but the Canadians are just wasting him.
- Young sells an enzuigiri like syrup of Ipecac as Sabin gets to Kip for the hot tag.
- Kip James is a house of or on fire.
- Kip misses a corner splash and gets a stunner/RKO by Roode.
- As the ref is preoccupied, Roode gets the flag... but Rhino runs-in!
- Rhino wipes Roode out, leaving him helpless for a Sabin guillotine legdrop and pin!
- Sabin gives Nash an "okay, we're going to wrestle... or something" glare.
- Out of nowhere, Christy Hemme comes out and passes a document to "Mister Hardsell" Don West.
- West reads that the new face of TNA management has adjusted the Slammiversary card to include...
- Can you guess?
- Samoa Joe vs. Scott Steiner!
- That, on top of King Of The Mountain 3, Kevin Nash vs. Chris Sabin, The Bingo Hall Brawl and likely more to come.
- Slammiversary is June 18th.
- TNA iMPACT is Thursday nights on Spike TV.