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Thread: Armageddon has started: HoHo reviews movies!

  1. #1
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    Armageddon Armageddon has started: HoHo reviews movies!

    Don't worry you're not drunk guys, this isn't a nightmare, and Armageddon hasn't started yet. This is my second attempt, yes second attempt in doing a review for people who care about my opinion, and respect it. You know I never attempted to be some super smart guy when it comes to such things like this, but I do bring some comedy and I look at movies differently especially when my Drama background in High School and College. So maybe you guys can take the time and consider me "worthy" this time around and just give your honest opinion on the movie and feedback on how I can improve if you can. Now you guys must be wondering what movie would this creep attempt to review, and I thought what's one movie I have a passion with, and somehow persuade someone to see themselves. I only need look into my childhood and turn back the clocks back to 1991 for the answer.


    Drop Dead Fred[1991]

    Now I never had the pleasure in seeing this movie in his hay day, since at the time I was only three. I had the chance to see the movie a few more years down the line and it changed me for the better and the worse lol. I made this my first choice to review because it's in the honor of the great Comedian who's recently passed, Rik Mayall. Drop Dead Fred is about the young Adult Lizzie played by Phoebe Cates, with her rocky life on the edge during this point, it gets worse when her imaginary friend Drop Dead Fred returns to pick up where they left off when Lizze was a little girl. I find it funny when the movie itself is PG-13, it didn't feel that way the first few moments when you hear Lizzie as a little girl, saying what a bullshit lol.

    Right now Lizzie is trying to get her hubby Charles back in her life, but I thought to me she was more into Charles because her Mother thought of him as a good catch. Lizzie during the moment at times is afraid of her Mother, and boy I can relate to that. Back in the day if I did something wrong as a kid, all my Mother had to do is give me one look, and I knew if I fucked up one more time, that would be my ass. Lizzie during the movie doesn't understand why has Fred come back, after being sealed up her Mother. She learns to understand Fred, even with his crazy antics was there to get rid of her fears between being alone, and her fear of her Mother. As a kid seeing a imaginary friend, breaking windows, and getting Lizzie into trouble, I wished to have that as a kid. Their are times in this movie, where I remember seeing it for the first time, I was like holy...did I just see Drop Dead Fred look up a girls skirt.

    Lizzie as a character, went from a frail as a twig, to a strong, beautiful Women. Now I don't want to bore you with info and info up the ass, I did learn to conquer your fears inside of keeping them inside. I've learned as I've gotten older, that fear is a great thing and it makes you stronger as a person to get rid of them. If you want a great story, comedy and craziness from the late, great Rik Mayall check out this film, you wouldn't regret it! Now you might want to see a review from me rating wise, but I borer my enjoyment of the movie, and the quality of the film. Last time I gave someone a score for a movie, people flipped their weaves over it so I won't give a rating. Lastly here's a funny scenes I still remember from the movie itself enjoy!



    Rating: 4 outta 5 fists
    Last edited by Jim; 02-06-2015 at 07:58 PM.

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    Re: So you think you can review

    Hoho you really should give a rating if you're gonna review it.

    Cool movie though.

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    Re: So you think you can review

    Thanks for taking a look Ken, and I just did give a rating for the movie in my own way.

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    So you think you can review

    How many fists make it a worthwhile use of time? 3 maybe 4 if it's good?
    Last edited by Nash; 06-21-2014 at 07:06 AM. Reason: k


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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by Javier Nasherano View Post
    How many fists make it a worthwhile use of time? 3 maybe 4 if it's good?
    You mean worthwhile your time for you to check out the movie you mean? I say 4 is good to me, I won't give movies usually 5's because I can always find something wrong with a movie, that could of been improved. Thanks for chiming in Nash I appreciate it!

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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by HoHo Shoryuken View Post
    I won't give movies usually 5's because I can always find something wrong with a movie, that could of been improved.
    Can I request that you review The Godfather so I can see if you find something wrong or that could have been improved?


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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by Fuji Vice View Post
    Can I request that you review The Godfather so I can see if you find something wrong or that could have been improved?
    The Godfather part 1 and part 2 are those rare exceptions where I would give them 5's. Part three on the other hand is a whole different story.

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    Re: So you think you can review

    REVIEW THE LION KING

    Spoiler:

    I solemnly swear I am up to no good


    Quote Originally Posted by Steve
    I stopped reading when it became clear it was the same butthurt smarkf*g "real wrasslin'" crybaby rant on every youtube vid featuring Cena.



    Quote Originally Posted by Buff Bagwell on John Cena
    But I think he's bigger than Buff Bagwell. I really do.
    [02:00 AM] Dakstang : girls ain't dudes


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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by HoHo Shoryuken View Post
    You mean worthwhile your time for you to check out the movie you mean? I say 4 is good to me, I won't give movies usually 5's because I can always find something wrong with a movie, that could of been improved. Thanks for chiming in Nash I appreciate it!
    I see so it's not the actual size of the fist that matters, it's just raw numbers were dealing with.


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    2018 - 20/15/1 - 4th in Regular Season, 2nd Overall


  10. #10
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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by Carl Grimes View Post
    REVIEW THE LION KING
    The Lion King though, I might want to go into my childhood movies some more, I'll think about it. I would say by next week I should have another review up.

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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by HoHo Shoryuken View Post
    The Godfather part 1 and part 2 are those rare exceptions where I would give them 5's. Part three on the other hand is a whole different story.
    Hey fuck you part 3 is good get the fuck outta your own thread!

    Spoiler:


  12. #12
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    Re: So you think you can review

    Well now we go into my next review, I first gotta thank Creeping Death, and Professor Booty for telling me to check out this movie out a few weeks ago. I must say if you want to watch some good films, go to these two guys as well as Fuji, they will lead you in the right direction in the world of movies.


    Drive[2011]


    Here's one of those movies, both Booty and DD lead me to watch a few weeks ago, and it's called. The movie is starting Ryan Gosling, Bryan Cranston and Carey Mulligan among the great cast for this film. Now I'm going to be honest with the readers, I didn't at first want to see the movie, mainly due to not really being a fan of Ryan Gosling in his career. After I heard Cranston was apart of the film, and also hearing Ron Perlman playing Nino, I had to check out to see all the buzz about the movie. Now Driver is about a very quiet, to himself Hollywood Stuntman moonlighting as a getaway driver for criminals. Everything was going right in the life of the Driver, yes his name is Driver, I'll get to why I didn't like that later, but with the Driver on cloud 9 in his life, Cat shit just hit the fan when he starts getting involved with Carey Mulligan's character Irene! Now as a man myself, if I start to see problems getting webbed into my life, because of this girl, I'm not going to stay in the relationship. The Driver wanted some of Irene I suppose, he wanted to try all the crazy sex positions on her, because why else would he keep interacting with the lady?

    It gets worse when Irene's Husband Standard Gabriel returns from Jail, wanting to get away from the life of crime. It seems Standard had to pay debts especially the character Cook for protection in Jail, that leads to Standard having to rob a Pawn shop, to pay the debt. Who are you gonna call when you're in trouble, fuck the Ghostbusters in this situation, you're going to call the Driver! Ryan Gosling is the man at the wheel to make sure this robbery goes down, perfectly. Just like anyone else who hires the Driver, they have a 5 minute window. Driver says in those five minutes, I'm yours. If anything happens a minute either side of that, run for the hills, because you're on your own. You would think that with the Driver ready to help in this situation, everything would go well, and it did for a moment till Standard gets killed leaving the Pawn shop???! What to do..what to do for Driver book it bitch! This leads to the Driver, and Blanche also a person helping in the robbery, being pursued by a car. After some great driving skills by the Driver, he's able to get away!

    Driver's head must be spinning right now, like if was on Speed, because he's pretty much kept outta trouble, and now trouble is meeting him straight in the face, and you can't escape it now. As Blanche and the Driver hid out at a local Motel, he finds out not only does the bag full of money have a value of million dollars, but finding out this was a set up all along. After the Hitmen find out their locating, and the gravy train kill of Blanche, the Driver once escapes killing both Hitmen! Geez he's good at what he does, why don't he go overseas and take his skills into the war going on these days. After finding the location of a Cook, who's real name is Chris at a local strip joint, he starts to use his inner Home Depot in him?! Yes he brought a Hammer, and it uses it well as he gets Chris to tell him Nino set up the Heist, and the plan was to have Standard and the Driver dead. Now just before all this chaos happened, the Driver had finished up a business deal with the help of Shannon, Bryan Cranston character, to invest in a race car, for the Driver to drive. Now the big Don in this movie, Bernie Rose after seeing the skills of the Driver, gave him to the deal. Nino obviously didn't like the Driver, and from that moment on, it lead to the plan to kill him later in the movie.Since Nino knows this movie belong to the Mob, he needed that money back, and the deaths of the Driver and Irene are needed for him to not have any heat on him.

    After the Driver meets with Irene telling her what happened, and to take the money and run, one of Nino's Hitman shows up in the apartment elevator! After a long kiss with Irene and the Driver, the Driver gets the best of the Hitman. No..no he didn't just knock him out, we thought Bryan Danielson kick a motherfuckers head in, The Driver did some work on that dude's face. By the end, you can't even see where his face is, brother is bad ass. Just make sure you ain't eating during that scene, you might throw up! After the Driver warns Shannon to get out of town, Rose shows up at their garage and kills Shannon! It's a game of chess now, and the Driver is going for the checkmate, and he's going to win no matter what! The Driver starts to stalk Nino at his Pizza place, and a car cash insues, I wonder who won that?! The Limo Nino is sitting in tumbles over a cliff, and I thought Nino was dead. Nope Nino is still alive, as he is stalked by the masked Driver, and he is downed by the Driver, now he can sleep with the fishes tonight! After Rose gets the phone call by the Driver, that Nino is dead a meeting is set up between the two characters. After Rose tells the Driver, Irene and her son will safe, he can't say the same for the Driver. With the Driver knowing he could be killed right here, he knows it and welcomes the fate of his life to approach it head on.

    After the Driver and Rose go to the parking lot, for the Driver to give Rose the money, Rose pulls out a knife and stabs the Driver in the abdomen. The Driver didn't come to the meeting alone as he had, his own knife and stabs Rose in his neck! After the Driver pulls himself together, the film ends with the Driver bleeding badly, driving away in the dark! Now I must say their was a few things I had a problem with. One the lack of story with the Driver. The audience should of been given more of a story of his life. I mean I'm a person who likes to keep his personal life to himself, but if you get to know me, I will tell you everything if I trust you. I would of thought the Driver would of told Irene more about him, but maybe he didn't have time to do so. Another thing I didn't like at times, the Driver and Irene's interactions in the movie. At times both characters were oddly just looking at each other, I was like are you two going to fuck, or just look at each other in a staring contest? Lastly the ending seeing Driver hurt, just driving away in the dark? That ending makes me believe, theirs a opening for a second film, even though it seems that might not happen anytime soon. I guess the Driver was moving on to the next town, to start over again being to himself? Either way those are minor faults I didn't like, but overall I did love the movie. I legit one of those Scorpion Jackets Ryan Gosling's character was rocking, but it's in the Summer I don't want to pass out wearing it. The opening ten minutes got me hype, to watch the rest of the film, so I would say to anyone who wants to see the movie give it that amount of time. If you want action, blood, car chasing this is movie right up your alley!


    Rating:4 outta 5 fists

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    Re: So you think you can review

    Not bad HoHo, I would leave out running down the entire movie but otherwise, a pretty solid review. I scored it a 9/10 when I did my review a couple of years ago, so we're pretty even on our overall feelings. In regards to your mentioning a possible sequel, I thought this might provide you with a little closure in that regard....

    Quote Originally Posted by Fuji Vice
    While the soundtrack to the film is excellent from all sides (including a repeated but near perfect use of Brian Eno's "Ascent (An Ending)" for the scenes between Gosling and Mulligan) the song "A Real Hero" by College actually echoes a lot of what the film is trying to say in its ambiguous ending. To begin with, Gosling's character has proven to be a real hero, and for once, a real human being. As I firmly believe, his character is somewhat of a sociopath and has a lot of trouble dealing with people on a personal or emotional level. He is also prone to fits of violence and realizes that his lifestyle allows these violent acts to follow him wherever he goes. Therefore he chooses, as the song states, to be a real hero and a real human being for once in his life and simply walks away from the woman and her child. Realizing that by staying with them he will only end up causing their suffering is a major step in his life, perhaps allowing him the opportunity to grow on some sort of emotional level in the future. While the ending may not have been the one that some wanted, it is nevertheless an accurate one and one that shows a lot of heart in a character that didn't show much throughout the duration of the film.
    Personally I don't feel a sequel is warranted and I'm pretty happy with my assessment of the ending.


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  14. #14
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    Re: So you think you can review

    Yeah I fell you Fuji, if I had to guess for a sequel Irene and her Son would need to be kidnapped. The Driver has to come out of retirement to save their lives and he gets the job done in the end. Shoot I didn't even mentioned the music, I dug the 80's theme throughout the film, some people might be put off by it.

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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by HoHo Shoryuken View Post
    Yeah I fell you Fuji, if I had to guess for a sequel Irene and her Son would need to be kidnapped. The Driver has to come out of retirement to save their lives and he gets the job done in the end. Shoot I didn't even mentioned the music, I dug the 80's theme throughout the film, some people might be put off by it.
    Yeah, the music was really good, definitely a big part of making the movie feel the way that it did.

    If you enjoyed this I would highly recommend seeking out To Live and Die in LA and Manhunter, two 80's movies that this one borrows heavily from in terms of style.


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  16. #16
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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by Fuji Vice View Post
    Yeah, the music was really good, definitely a big part of making the movie feel the way that it did.

    If you enjoyed this I would highly recommend seeking out To Live and Die in LA and Manhunter, two 80's movies that this one borrows heavily from in terms of style.
    To Live and Die in LA, isn't that movie with Willem Dafoe? If so I might need to check out that film this weekend.

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    Re: So you think you can review

    Quote Originally Posted by HoHo Shoryuken View Post
    To Live and Die in LA, isn't that movie with Willem Dafoe? If so I might need to check out that film this weekend.
    Yep, he's in it, along with William Petersen of CSI fame. Really good film.


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    Re: So you think you can review

    Jesus, I didn't think anything could make me dislike Drive, but this might. I'm conflicted too. Part of me says you didn't write this since it's literally the first post I've ever seen from you in which you use halfway decent punctuation with periods, commas, spaces, etc, but your spelling and nonsensical comments still stick. So, idk.

    Regardless, Drive is one of about 10-15 films I'd give a five star rating for and the soundtrack is probably my favorite of any film. Space Jam is up there too, but this takes the cake.

  19. #19
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    Re: So you think you can review

    Jesus. That was unnecessarily harsh to Hoho.

    Solid review man.

    Spoiler:

    I solemnly swear I am up to no good


    Quote Originally Posted by Steve
    I stopped reading when it became clear it was the same butthurt smarkf*g "real wrasslin'" crybaby rant on every youtube vid featuring Cena.



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  20. #20
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    Re: So you think you can review

    Please review the following cinematic masterpieces:

    Surf Ninjas
    3 Ninjas
    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3
    The Super Ninja
    American Ninja 3
    Ninja III: The Domination
    Revenge Of The Ninja
    Ninja: Prophecy Of Death
    Lethal Ninja
    Black Dynamite





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