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Thread: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

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    Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Lazy Mods :p

    Drew Stevenson: This was a fantastic promo, one of your best. Right from the opening line it oozed arrogance and immediately put Drew over everyone else. It did so in creative way as well, fighting for the purity of wrestling and claiming to be the last man left who believes in it and represents it. While the FWA-CWA war goes on all Drew cares about is wrestling. I love the idea of Drew fighting his own battle amid everything going on in the FWA. Using that ideal of his to put himself above all others and dub himself as always being the victor because he's a pure wrestler is a great way to write it. It lets Drew constantly have that arrogance and sense of success because he's the best Champion in the FWA. The ending was just as good, after the simplicity and pride in the simplicity of the promo, literally painting an elaborate scene was a very nice touch, and perfect way too end it considering Halls penchant for the elaborate. Most importantly though this was an enjoyable read, one that I really cant critique at all.

    Devin Golden: It was a really good touch to use the events of Five Star Attraction to set the scene, and create the theme of being "almost there". It not only accomplishes that but helps expand and reinforce the FWA/CWA universe. It was a unique, yet classic Devin Golden promo. Never trash talking, never flat out putting his opponent down, but still doing enough to make Devin look better than PAJ. That in and of itself is no easy feat. It also comes across as Devin dangling that greatness in front of PAJ, telling him how important this match is and constantly reminding PAJ he isn't there yet. Another great promo. This Fight Night is off too a great start so far.
    Credit to Comeback Kid for the GFX

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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Starting to continue to the theme of Rondo having face elements (comedy, honesty) mixed in with an overall heel attitude. Hence the gif at the end of the promo. I really enjoyed writing that actually, I feel like it as a heel, it's damn easy to just resort to insulting people and whatnot. Tried to do it in a different way this week. Will start giving out reviews tomorrow at some point.


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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Wolf: There's something so beautifully haunting about Wolf singing a children's song. This promo was set up really well. You created a physical scene to imagine and a sense of discomfort and the peculiar to go along with it. From there it was very cool to get a look at Wolfs childhood, not exactly what I had imagined but that character arc/memory really adds to the promo and the match. He's endured the pain of betrayal before and I liked the little moment of madness with him drawing on that past pain and cursing Roy. It was classic Wolf, but minus his full fury. I actually quite liked the absence of the all caps Wolf going mad paragraph in this promo. It showed him to be focused and intent, even slightly calm (by his standards) as he embraces being the light and not the darkness of old.

    Jason Gryphon: Like Wolfies promo it was cool getting a glimpse at Jasons past in this promo, this time through meeting up with an old friend in Zeus. The man born into wealth and into success is a classic tale to tell but you did it well here, uniquely enough to be Grypon, using Zeus to motivate him was a nice way of keeping the promo together as well and delving into any arrogance Jason had built up as Champion. The back and forth between the two of them seemed alot more natural than it has in some of your promos as well. Definitely an improvement there.

    Ryan Rondo: This was a great start to the new heel Ryan Rondo, I really liked the intro. Instantly giving him an air of arrogance and superiority by sitting among the unwashed masses. The autograph as payment was an awesome extension of that. After years and years of writing Rondo as the squeaky clean face you have made the transition to him being a heel very smoothly. This wasn't a promo that seemed like an experiment in writing a heel, just a great heel promo. He was cocky and rude and all about himself. I'm looking forward to reading more heel Rondo promos. The only negative I can point out is some of the coding seemed a little off and the visual image of Ryan taking a leak will haunt my nightmares.
    Credit to Comeback Kid for the GFX

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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Ashley O'Ryan: This one stood out to me as the deepest and most meaningful promo of the week. It really explored Ashleys mindset, especially as it relates to Gabrielle and Stu's place in his life. Theres alot of material there and understandably so their places in his life would weigh on him. This was another one of those promos that really makes Ashley seem like a real person, everything's not perfect and he's stuck in a place where the woman making him happy is not approved of by his dearest friend. Add the drama of his marriage on top of that and the CWA business and its a turbulent time to be Ashley O'Ryan. And on that topic I loved the ending, I remember when you mentioned you were thinking of having Moira partner off with Ben Cryos, and it was just as touching a moment as I thought it would be. Very touching nod to the people behind the characters of the FWA.

    Saddle Sally: Saddle Sallys sexiest promo ever and we learned who wears the pants in that relationship, even if they are tiny denim short short pants. I liked seeing the raw sexual side of Sally come out for this match, and some of that dirty talk was quite...nice. I liked as well how she started out staying true to her good Christian morals, but by promos end was focused on 'enjoying' herself out in the ring with Gabs. The last two paragraphs focusing on Sally wanting to show Gabby she's the new bad girl of the FWA was a good way of keeping the sexuality going and letting Sally brag about beating Gabby. This is going to be the sexiest match ever!
    Credit to Comeback Kid for the GFX

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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    I am SOOOOOOOOO glad that I'm not grading the Bra & Panties Match between Gabby & Sally as the pictures alone would make things way too hard to choose between them.

    [I WIN]


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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Stu St.Clair: As much as I do love the Vodka and Venom partnership, greatest tag team in FWA history the strain on their friendship adds alot to promos like these, it helped make Ashley's promo deeper and it helps make Stu's promo. Especially after we've seen them as worst of enemies and best of friends over the years, this new dynamic is a fresh one. Its helping reignite that old flame in Stu as well. I liked as well how Stu seemed to build his opponents up, talking up their accomplishments, particularly Princeton and then using those past heights to tear them down and remind them where they are now.

    The only thing I will say negative, isn't about the promo but rather how this match now feels so huge. I think honestly with all the history these promos have reminded me about between VnV and McLean/Princeton this would have made a great match for a PPV.
    Credit to Comeback Kid for the GFX

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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Ryan Hall: The first part of the promo was really well written and did everything it intended to do. It was a smart move, and an interesting way to mock Stevenson. Showing his love for wrestling then showing him have to start to embrace the theatrical side of it. It fits Drew's gimmick in that sense of his passion for something in a world that focuses on other things, and makes him look pathetic, heel trash talk 101, without actually 'speaking' as the Hall character. Instead just presenting a scene, and that fits the bill perfectly of what this match is; the passionate, strictly wrestling loving Stevenson vs. the theatrics of Ryan Hall. From there it was Ryan at his simple cruel best. I really liked that paragraph on precious stones, after mocking Drew for being a wrestling purist as it were, you focused on other aspects of him and tore into those as well. The same goes for Ryan bragging about his wrestling pedigree, wanting to beat Drew and what Drew does best, epitomizes the arrogance and love of humiliating others. He even destroyed his own trophy as a way to ridicule what Drew cares about most. As always it was a fun and really well written promo from you, minus the occasional spelling mistake :p
    Credit to Comeback Kid for the GFX

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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Quote Originally Posted by The Altyrell View Post
    I am SOOOOOOOOO glad that I'm not grading the Bra & Panties Match between Gabby & Sally as the pictures alone would make things way too hard to choose between them.
    I just had to.

    Okay let me get some of these reviews going!

    Gabrielle: WOW that was a sexy promo. Way to go after Sally but you also interweaved the great history between the two characters and even the possible sexual tension. This promo was fun, energetic, seductive and very engaging. Bra and Panties matches are the kind of events that I wish the WWE was still doing, because they bring out such an interesting dynamic in characters (including Ashley) and I have a feeling this match will have it's fair share of memorable moments.

    Drew Stevenson: Well done rp, you kept things focused and really went after Ryan Hall in an affective way. This is a good example for other rpers how concise promos that don't drag on can really have an impact. Comparing Hall to Kennedy and even going so far to basically call Hall an imitation of Kennedy was cold blooded but you made your point very clear and supported it in a nice way. I really liked this promo. Maybe could have done with a bit more description of Drew's actions and demeanor but overall great work.

    Whyte Thunder/Devin Golden: I am enjoying what's going on with this character and how he is evolving into such a big face for the company. This was a solid promo that really went into the relationship Golden has with the FWA and why he dislikes PAJ so much. The almost famous theme was used well without ever becoming too gimmicky for a match of this nature. Some of the meandering about PAJ's possibilities in the future was a bit oddly placed for the wind down of your rp but still you had an engaging rp for an engaging storyline.

    Wolf: I agree with ETE imagining Wolf singing a children's song is unsettling in all the right ways. If I were Jimmy King I'd be terrified about what Wolf was going to do to me after hearing this promo. Well done getting the arc and the details of it into an rp without feeling too much like a recap. This is classic Wolf; threatening, aggressive and powerful. Powerful in the sense that I could feel the freedom, the will to belong the frustration all of it I could feel it; the emotion of this promo.

    Jason Gryphon: Good promo! Really learned a lot about Jason in this promo and I like what Zeus Jordan brought to the table. It was like Jason defending himself in a sense, the conversation had just the right amount of conflict to make an rp that was a tad long winded flow nicely and become a quick read. This had a very cinematic feel, like this is some scene from a movie. Some of the dialogue was a bit too stilted at times, but for the majority of the promo it worked nicely.

    Ryan Rondo: I'm not sure why but this promo reminded me a bit of the final speech from Walter White on "Breaking Bad" it was like Rondo just doesn't give a crap anymore. He's here to finally get what he wants and what he feels he deserves. There is something very insightful about this rp and I can't place my finger on it at this very moment but it's almost beautiful and poetic. I hate Rondo in the sense of what he's doing to the FWA storyline wise but this rp is the kind of stuff that makes a character memorable, and even almost relatable. This Rondo/Wolf match is going to be so hard to grade.

    Stu St. Clair:: Great promo, always fun going aganist you. You analyze Princeton so well and it makes for interesting promos and results.

    PAJ: Like that PAJ is a man who wants to earn his accolades he's a heel but that kind of heel that wants to prove himself, he doesn't want it handed to him. That's a hard line to walk but you're doing a fine job of it. PAJ is one of my favorites of the past year and I think 2014 is going to be even bigger for him. This promo may have been a bit too soft for the match that you are in, but I appreciated it and liked the character development this brought forward.

    Vincent Blackbird: Actually I'm not 100% sure what just happened in this promo. I mean that in both a good and bad way. It's intriguing and it makes me want to know more, but it was horribly short and didn't quite give enough to tease it more frustrated me. What's going on with Vincent? He's a gun for hire now? Is he King's gun for hire? I'm confused I've got to admit but intrigued.

    Ryan Hall: You always have the best hooks into your promo that just draw you in and make you want to know more and more. Ryan has such a nice flow and you have a way with words that makes him equally sophisticated and dangerous. But in this promo he also comes off as a scholar a student of the game and a teacher in some regards. This was a nice way to go after Drew Stevenson and assert yourself against him. A good read.

    [b]Jehtro Warren[b]: So different than most promos and so it stuck out to me. Maybe tone down the salty language but this was a cool promo that didn't feel like a promo more like a vignette into Jehtro's life. He is a character that every week makes me want to know more about him, so keep up the good work. Also this seems like the first ice fishing promo and reminds me of a hilarious running joke from "American Hustle" which I know you haven't seen but now I encourage you to do so.

    Ashley O' Ryan: This promo was so damn cool! Good dialogue with Ashley it just oozes his character and that little twist at the end with Moira has been on the hook like I'm watching a tela novella!



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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Got to love the double entendres :p and I do so enjoy confusing the heck out of people lol as for being a gun for hire, or being one for Mr. King, if the price is right and it benefits Vincent he'd be a gun for hire for even Carmine Reaper... If the price was right. But as for Vince and Mr. King's deal, that will be for another promo as Vincent has to deal with two people from the past whom stolen his rebuilt Norah. Hopefully she won't have to be rebuilt yet again.

    [I WIN]


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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    A big apology for again failing to promo, as I'd said I'd been having computer issues, so brought home my work laptop to promo, only to find I could not connect it to the Internet. I then began to type my promo on my mobile phone, but when I went to "Go Advanced" it disappeared (by this point it was about 5am) and I conceded defeat.

    I am due a new computer to arrive tomorrow, but I'll confirm this when I'm good to go.

    Mainly, apologies go out to Jabby & Nash, but especially to Matty.
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    Quote Originally Posted by AzaleanShake View Post
    may have been too high to English at one point. My bad.

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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Thomas Princeton: The Jimmy-Tom interactions were my favourite part of this promo, they felt very natural. I can see that conversation actually occurring on the show, The Roots involvement just added to the realism. As I mentioned in Stu's review, I'm really digging the history here, theres alot to the VnV/Tom & Shane feud, and you drew on all of it in writing this promo. You write Tom with a very understated confidence, he's not over the top but you always know he thinks of himself as the greatest thing since sliced bread.

    Jethro Warren: This came across as a scene out of a spy movie (a dirty hippie spy movie) but a spy movie none the less as opposed to a typical promo That worked with and against the promo I feel. It was written really well and was a great scene, but the lack of focus upon the match at hand does hurt it, but again the story told within in it is a great one.
    Credit to Comeback Kid for the GFX

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    Re: Fight Night 1/8/2014 Promo Discussion

    Thanks for the reviews ETE and Matt, appreciated, will have one for you guys soon when i wake up, tired as shit.


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