Jim Reviews WWE Weeklies

[Jim]

I remember watching Macho Man making his predictions. I remember he said, "Good News, Owen Hart...", then pulls his name off of the bracket and throws it behind the board, "Doesn't qualify or move on" something to that effect. Then that ended up being the winner. Kind of wonder if that was intentional or what. Looking back at that King of The Ring, he was the obvious winner.

"The good news is Owen Hart...runs out of rocket fuel".

That segment was actually pretty fun because of how Savage would explain all of his choices for the winners.

[Cloud Strife]

"The good news is Owen Hart...runs out of rocket fuel".

That segment was actually pretty fun because of how Savage would explain all of his choices for the winners.

Ah yes, thanks for the correction. If I remember correctly, the only first round winner he got correctly was IRS defeating Mabel? I think Kid beat Double J by DQ or something, and Razor made it to the finals. It would be kind of cool for WWE to make this an event again. If nothing else, make it a Network Event. Have 16 Wrestlers, wrestle qualifying matches on their brands and then have all three rounds in the same night. They could also do a female version as Queen of The Ring on the same show. That way you have six matches, which could cover two hours. If not, throw in a Mid Card title (even the CW Title would suffice) match. Just my opinion though.

[Jim]

Smackdown
July 8, 2004

Michael Cole and Tazz runs down the main matches tonight including two title matches - John Cena defending the US Title against Booker T and The WWE Tag Champions The Dudley Boyz defending against Billy Kidman and Paul London.

Rob Van Dam vs Mark Jindrak
RVD’s current rival, Rene Dupree, joined the commentators to provide some guest commentary. At this stage, Jindrak is still doing his Reflection of Perfection act, but he’s already lost his manager, Teddy Long. The Reflection of Perfection was such a dud of a gimmick that it only lasted a few months, mostly on Velocity. In fact, since coming over to Smackdown in the draft back in March, this is only Jindrak’s second match on Smackdown, with the previous being way back in April. Jindrak would attack before the bell to give himself far more offense than you would have expected. Most of the offense is build around working over RVD’s back. RVD would make a comeback only to set-up a very awkward Rolling Thunder attempt because he took forever to actually attempt the move. Seriously, I don’t know what happened. First RVD looked at the crowd, then slightly adjusted Jindrak, then looked at the crowd some more, stalling, looking at the crowd, before finally going for the Rolling Thunder that Jindrak would counter with a pair of knees to the back. Not that Jindrak’s regaining his time on offense would matter though as moments later, RVD knocks him off of the middle rope during a superplex attempt with RVD finishing Jindrak off with the Split Legged Moonsault. Just in case you weren’t already aware that Jindrak was a geek, he was beaten by something that wasn’t even RVD’s finisher. With that, Jindrak would be sent back to Velocity where he’d kill a few months before finally returning to Smackdown in the fall to become a member of Kurt Angle’s new faction. Pretty easy victory for RVD despite rarely being on offense. **

In a replay from last week, JBL defended his newly won WWE World Title by beating Spike Dudley. After the match, Eddie Guerrero came out to attack him to continue the fight. Guerrero announced that in two weeks, the two would have a cage match.

Backstage, Josh Matthews interviewed JBL regarding his WWE World Title defense inside of a steel cage next week. JBL puts himself over as such a gentleman while Guerrero is a lowlife. In a questionable line, JBL claims that Guerrero never bothered coming to wrestle in Canada while he was WWE Champion like JBL is apparently going to do tonight in Winnipeg. What a bizarre line. I understand heels lie, but it was just a few weeks ago that Smackdown held a televised taping in Toronto while Guerrero was champion and he wrestled on the show. Couldn’t you have just given some BS insult against Eddie that while true, isn’t fair to use against Guerrero? Anyways, JBL brings out another champion, El Gran Luchadore, to tease their upcoming match tonight. Don’t worry, JBL promises to pay for Luchadore’s hospital bills. See, THAT sort of BS line is something I love since it’s Canada. Even if Luchadore is going to have to go to the hospital, it’s not as if he’d have to worry about it money wise like he would if the show took place in America.

The Dudley Boyz © vs Paul London and Billy Kidman - WWE Tag Titles
A rematch from the last episode of Velocity where Kidman and London won a non-title match by DQ. Going into this match, there wasn’t any reason to suspect a title switch would even be a possibility. After all, their previous match didn’t even air on Smackdown! At this point, just seeing London in such a match is pretty rewarding because even though he is really low on the card, he’s hungry to deliver a good performance. The entire match was built around London excelling. Early on, it was just London’s dives before he crashed and burned on the outside. That set-up a Dudley Boyz’ face-in-peril sequence with the commentators questioning if London will even be any help to Kidman if he could get the hot tag. Once Kidman got the hot tag, things picked up with a lot of hope spots for the challengers. London is showing fire and you’re somewhat buying into the idea that an upset is at least possible. London prevents a Dudleys’ What’s Up by knocking D-Von off of the top rope. Kidman would switch places with Bubba Ray and London would deliver a What’s Up Drop that literally destroyed London’s knee brace due to the force of coming down on the mat. London would lay Bubba out with a super kick and Kidman would nail a Shooting Star Press to win the match and crown NEW WWE Tag Team Champions. Great job by London and I found it impressive that they slowly won over the crowd. Although London/Kidman wouldn’t do anything with the titles, considering the fact that they were penciled in to be The Dudleyz program for the next couple of months, they needed this upset victory to add any sort of heat to the program. Otherwise, it’s just The Dudleyz randomly feuding against a pair of JTTS. ***

Backstage, the new champions are congratulated by their fellow cruiserweights, The Bashams (...wut), The FBI, and Billy Gunn. The Dudleyz confront London and Kidman and after a stand off, offer their hands in a sign of respect to the new champions. I’m actually surprised that the WWE put as much effort into this as they did.

Elsewhere, Josh Matthews interviews Kenzo Suzuki. He’s looking to win the WWE US Title, but now states that he loves America. Hmm…

Cena comes out to defend his WWE US Title. He cuts a quick rap on Booker before Kenzo Suzuki runs out to try and attack Cena. Cena is able to get the best of Kenzo, but in knocking Suzuki out of the ring, Luther Reigns blindsided Cena. Reigns would drop Cena on the mat with his finisher, The Reign of Terror. Looks like the US Title match will have to wait.

JBL vs El Gran Luchadore
Billed as a Champion vs Champion match with Luchadore apparently the champion of all of Mexico. This is actually a rematch from the April 22nd edition of Smackdown, which oddly enough also took place in Canada. On that night, the masked man was portrayed by Paul London. This time around, it’s Shannon Moore. It’s pretty decent for what it is. Luchadore hangs in there, but he’s all about posing, resulting in JBL easily able to always get the best of him. Late in the match, a second El Gran Luchadore appears to knock JBL out of the ring. The new Luchadore switches places with the original and actually gets in offense against the champion. Immediately it becomes clear that this new Luchadore is actually Eddie Guerrero. The match just sorta...ends with JBL on the outside and the new Luchadore getting on the mic to hype next week’s JBL/Guerrero WWE Title steel cage match. We couldn’t get a finish here? Eh, it served its purpose. ** ¼

Backstage, Josh Matthews interviews Booker T regarding his upcoming WWE US Title shot. Booker’s all smiles due to Cena’s previous attack by Kenzo and Reigns.

Raw Rebound highlights Eugene’s chance to be GM for the night due to Eric Bischoff’s absence. Chris Jericho earned an WWE IC Title shot by winning musical chairs, but Batista would interfere in his match to ensure Randy Orton retained the title. Meanwhile, Triple H conned Eugene into fucking over Chris Benoit and Edge during a tag match against Triple H and Ric Flair. Vengeance is this Sunday.

Backstage, Rey Mysterio is hanging backstage with Spike Dudley and Scotty when The Dudley Boyz show up. Dudleyz request some alone time with Spike where they reminded Spike that they offered to accompany him during his match last week against JBL. Spike refused to let them, which meant he may have prevented himself from becoming WWE Champion. Bubba again tries to talk Spike into accepting his offer of providing Spike a bit of help in his upcoming match, but Spike blows off his brothers, laughing at the fact that they’re no longer the tag champions.

Rey Mysterio, Spike Dudley, and Scotty vs Chavo Guerrero, Jamie Noble, and Akio
Although this one obviously didn’t receive much time, they made the most out of what they were given. The first half was just about Mysterio playing the face-in-peril until he could get a hot tag to Scotty. That kicked off a second half where it was all about all six men hitting spots and immediately going into the next spot. Tons of energy with even guys like Akio standing out with his dive to the outside. Despite not becoming The Boss yet, Spike already feels more relevant and fresh than he had in a couple of years in this current position. Alas, the Spike story is about how despite looking good, he can’t get victories without The Dudley Boyz helping him out. As a result, Noble counters a Dudley Dog into a neckbreaker and then pins Spike with a Tiger Driver. A bit surprising that Noble would be the one picking up the pinfall instead of Chavo since this is only Noble’s second victory on Smackown this year, the first being way back in mid January. Fun stuff. ** ½

Back from commercial and Paul Heyman is in the ring. He reads off a written speech where he throws his now former clients, The Dudley Boyz, under the bus, blaming them for everything that happened to Paul Bearer. Heyman is in tears as he begs for forgiveness from The Undertaker. Heyman is a great sniveling coward.

Before the main event, we get another plug for next week’s main event. Inside of a steel cage, JBL will defend the WWE World Title against Eddie Guerrero! Also announced is Luther Reigns vs Charlie Haas in a rematch from Great American Bash. Joy...

John Cena © vs Booker T - WWE US Title
Booker earned this title shot by winning a triple threat last week against RVD and Rene Dupree after he stole the pinfall from RVD. These two always had shit chemistry and this wasn’t any different. Before the match began, Kurt Angle was wheeled out by Luther Reigns to watch the match up close. Although the match only went fifteen minutes, it felt way longer. While Angle spent the match cheering on Booker, he would also break one of his crutches over Cena’s back when the referee wasn’t watching. This allowed Booker to maintain the advantage for most of the match. Cena would slowly get in more and more offense the longer it went on, causing Angle to become more desperate. The finish would see Booker selling on the outside, Angle using a cane to stand next to Booker, screaming for him to get up when Cena would continue the fight with Booker. Due to Booker ducking during a Cena closeline attempt, Angle would accidentally by hit with the closeline instead. Stealing Angle’s cane, Cena would knock out Reigns and then toss Booker back into the ring. Just before Cena can get the victory, Reigns attacked to cause the DQ. So glad I endured all of that just for a fuck finish. It gets worse though as Angle gets on the mic and demands that Reigns brings him the US Title because as a result of Cena laying his hands on the Smackdown GM, Cena is officially stripped of the US Championship! My big annoyance about this is that it didn’t really led to anything. Sure, Booker would become US Champion next week, would have a future messed up match with Cena in the future to kick off the Best of Five Series, but Angle flat out screwed Cena over, but it didn’t result in a Cena/Angle program. Why bother going to the effort of stripping Cena of the title and giving Booker the title if you’re going to keep the Cena/Booker feud going on and there’s already plans of having another screwy finish in an upcoming match? It’s all pointless. Another dull Cena/Booker encounter, but this one has the extra bonus of being overbooked when it didn’t need to be. * ½

Overall
If nothing else, this edition of Smackdown felt newsworthy. Between Cena being stripped of the WWE US Title and the Dudley Boyz being upsetted for the WWE Tag Titles, that’s two title switches, of sorts, in one night. With Great American Bash now eight days in the past, you can really feel like Smackdown is beginning its next chapter following its initial post-Wrestlemania angles. Eddie/JBL is just about done with Guerrero set to renew his program with Kurt Angle following next week’s episode. Booker T is now set up as Cena’s main rival. Spike Dudley actually an angle going on with the Dudley Boyz, who are now in a somewhat interesting program with Billy Kidman and Paul London. Even Chavo Guerrero has been depushed out of being a meaningful Cruiserweight star. Quality wise, I’d say the next few months is slightly better than the post-WM months, but the post-WM months had much greater highs such as the two Guerrero/JBL PPV matches beating out anything Smackdown is going to offer for the rest of the summer and fall.

[Stojy]

I take complete credit for this review. You're welcome everybody .

Expected that sort of rating for the RVD/Jindrak match. Didn't realise this episode of Smackdown was such a big one in terms of title changes though, crazy. One thing though, boy that entire Cena/Booker program was a stinker.

[Jim]

Survivor Series Showdown
November 21, 1993

For whatever reason, there’s a greater emphasis on this being known as “The Showdown” or “Sunday Night Showdown” rather than the proper name of “Survivor Series Showdown”. Maybe Survivor Series Showdown got replaced like literally everything else Survivor Series 1993-like.

This weekend on WWE Superstars - Bret Hart wrestled IRS when Mr. Fuji came down to the ring. Bret punched out Fuji, but that brought out Yokozuna and Jim Cornette. Fuji would end up sticking his flag into Bret’s back for the DQ. When IRS looked to continue the attack after the match, Owen Hart ran out for the rescue, leading to Bret and Yoko going at it a bit.

Vince McMahon and Bobby Heenan opens up the show with the two plugging the main event tonight of Bret Hart challenging Yokozuna for the WWE World Title. They claim that the result of the match is going to have huge ramifications on the Survivor Series...which makes zero sense. Neither Bret nor Yokozuna is scheduled in a singles match on the PPV. The big news is that this event is being held from two locations with the other hosted by Jim Ross and Gorilla Monsoon. Their big matches will be Doink vs Bastion Booger and Marty Jannetty vs IRS. Heenan plugs the planned segment of Rio Rogers with Shawn Michaels visiting the Hart Family house.

Bastion Booger vs Doink the Clown
Jesus. This is brutal on paper. A preview of the elimination match of Team Bigelow vs The Four Doinks at Survivor Series. It’s even worse than I imagined. Before the match, there’s a bunch of hijinx from Doink including wearing fake arms. Booger eventually managed to get the best of Doink by tripping him up and dragging the clown out of the ring, splashing him against the ring post. What followed was several minutes of Booger working over Doink without any offense from the clown. You know it’s dull when Jim Ross brings up how deliberate Booger is being multiple times. Doink eventually got in a flurry of punches, but Booger quickly squashed that come back. When Doink managed to avoid a closeline, rather than go into some offense, Doink foolishly just laughs, which allows Booger to deliver a closeline once Doink turns around. Booger covers, but Doink slaps Booger’s back, as if it’s the referee telling Booger that he won. Booger gets to his feet, with Doink tripping him up, quickly rolling him up to get the victory. The match went nearly eight minutes and Doink got in...three punches as offensive moves? An absolute trainwreck. ¼ *

After the match, Doink pulls out some hot sauce and pours it on Booger’s pizza that the big man brought out to the ring with him. An unaware Booger takes a big bite out of his pizza and goes crazy with the hotness. Poor fella.

Three weeks ago on WWE Superstars, history was made as Ludvig Borga cheated to beat Tatanka using one finger to end Tatanka’s undefeated streak. After the match, Yokozuna delivered a Banzai Drop to further injure Tatanka.

Raymond Rougeau brings out The All Americans team of Lex Luger, The Steiner Brothers, and The Undertaker to cut a promo on The Foreign Fanatics for the Survivor Series. The PPV is still days away, but there’s already been a couple of eliminations with the injuries to Tatanka and Pierre! Looking back, it’s odd that Rougeau was tasked with interviewing the team when his brother, Jacques, is on the Foreign Fanatics team.

Over at the WWE Studio, Todd Pettengill gives the fans a crash lesson on how to order PPV. It’s never been easier!

Four weeks ago on Monday Night Raw, following Crush’s heel turn, things seemed to have been smoothed over after Crush and Randy Savage reunited. Instead, Crush attacked Savage. That brought out Yokozuna to deliver a Banzai Drop to complete Crush’s heel turn. A couple of weeks later on Raw, Savage attacked Crush, causing WWE President, Jack Tunney, to rule that Savage could no longer be a part of the commentating team.

Crush w/Mr. Fuji vs Virgil
It was just this past week that Crush was named as Pierre’s replacement on the Foreign Fanatics team for the Survivor Series. At this point, Virgil has fallen firmly into the role of a JTTS, often teaming up with actual jobbers in losing tag team efforts on TV, but every once in awhile Virgil will be given a win against a jobber on Wrestling Challenge or Superstars. Despite the opening couple of minutes looking like it will just be a squash, Virgil actually gets in a surprising amount of offense to the point that he lands several dives including one to the outside. Although I do really dig Virgil’s offense, the match went on for far too long. All Virgil needed was a tad bit of offense to make it interesting. At some point, Virgil looking so good is only going to make Crush look bad. How is Crush supposed to be one of the top new heels when he struggles against a JTTS? Crush would end up finally winning after eight minutes with his vice grip hold. Okay, but would have been better at just a couple of minutes long. **

We go back to Superstars last week with Razor Ramon defending the IC Title against Rick Martel. In the match, Adam Bomb’s manager, Harvey Wippleman, tried to interfere to help Bomb’s teammate at Survivor Series, Martel, but all that ended up happening is Wippleman accidentally getting Martel counted out. That led to Martel roughing Wippleman up until Bomb came out to defend his manager. That brought out Diesel and IRS to try to calm their partners down so that they can go into Survivor Series on the same page. The segment ends with The Model and Bomb hugging it out.

We had off to Canada with Rio Rogers (Brother Love working a Texan gimmick where he sounds just like Dusty Rhodes) is with Shawn Michaels. They’re apparently right outside of the Hart family home. Inside of the “Hart” home, is a guy dressed in an old woman’s mask portraying Helen Hart. Stu Hart is another guy wearing a mask. Shawn makes a point that the Hart family favors Bret to Owen.

IRS vs Marty Jannetty
A preview of the upcoming Survivor Series match of Team IRS vs Team Razor. This is also billed as a former IC Champion vs a guy who wants to be IC Champion. Unlike with the Crush/Virgil match, Jannetty isn’t given much of a chance to fly around sadly. Although Jannetty is able to use his speed at first, once he’s sent head first into the steel steps, it allows IRS to control the majority of the match. As expected, IRS in charge means it’s dull city. Things would improve some as Jannetty makes a comeback at the very end, but he suffers a killer closeline that causes Jannetty to be turned inside out ala Rikishi. That gives IRS the victory. As a match, it’s okay, but I expected more with Jannetty in it. * ¾

Raymond Rougeau now brings out the entire Foreign Fantastics team. Jim Cornette gives a summary of the Foreign Fanatics/All Americans build-up with Tatanka being eliminated early, The All Americans smartening up and eliminating Pierre, but that only meant they could add Crush to their team. Johnny Polo dedicates the PPV match to Pierre.

Todd Pettengill is back with a Survivor Series reports. The big story going into Survivor Series is all of the early replacements. Pettengill hints that there may be even more replacements before the PPV! The card so far includes The Foreign Fanatics vs The All Americans, Bret Hart and the Harts vs Shawn Michaels (Previously Jerry Lawler) and The Knights, Team Razor (Currently with Mr. Perfect, but will be replaced with Randy Savage) vs Team IRS, and Team Bigelow vs The Four Doinks (Which ended up not even including the actual Doink!) There’s even going to a SMW Tag Team Titles match between The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express vs The Heavenly Bodies! Again, Pettengill stresses that he suspects there will be more changes announced. Be sure to watch tomorrow night’s edition of the shortened version of Survivor Series Showdown to get the latest news! Jesus, the build-up to this PPV was an absolute trainwreck. Literally the only match that either didn’t get changed in some manner or ended up being purposely misleading (Doink not being on The Four Doinks) is the non-WWE match!

Since I already reviewed the main event at the start of this year, let’s do a bit of copying and pasting.

Yokozuna © w/Mr. Fuji vs Bret Hart - WWE World Title
The DVD credits this as being a Raw match and while it is technically true it aired during a Raw telecast, it’s actually from Survivor Series Showdown 1993 (Yes, Jim, we know that this is Survivor Series Showdown…). What ended up happening is the week of Survivor Series ‘93, there was a 2 hour Survivor Series Showdown special on the USA Network on Sunday, Raw was then replaced with an one hour version of the Survivor Series Showdown on Monday, and then Survivor Series would air on PPV on Wednesday. This ended up being a rather good match that I’d consider as being better than both their underrated WM 9 match and their weaker WM 10 rematch. With this match going through two commercial breaks, it’s roughly the length of both of their Mania matches combined. Yoko was still at the stage of his life where he could move around rather fast for a guy his size. He brought some violence to the match by hitting Bret with a chair a couple of times behind the ref’s back. Fuji tried interfering, but Bret caught him on the apron and punched him down. The longer the match went on, the more I was getting into it with the crowd actually buying into the idea that we might see a new champion being crowned. Bret was able to knock Yokozuna down a few times and got in a few nearfalls following a middle rope bulldog. The finish of the match is admittedly pretty screwy, but it does make sense once you learn what really happened, which I will explain after the match review. What we saw was Bret locking in the Sharpshooter and Owen Hart coming down the entrance way high fiving the crowd. Then there’s an abrupt cut to Owen apparently attacking someone before going after Mr. Fuji and using the salt bucket to strike Yokozuna while Yoko was still locked in the Sharpshooter to draw the DQ. That result made little sense to me. This bizarre finish hurt the match some. It doesn’t ruin it, but when you had a rocking match going on and then the finish is the shits, it’s pretty disappointing. Still, I LOVE that the WWE has finally released a match from an USA Network special like the Survivor Series Showdown. It’s better than either PPV match between Bret and Yoko. Even with the awful finish, it’s well worth checking out. *** ¼

So, what REALLY happened at the end of that match? To explain what happened, it’s important to go over what was happening in the WWE at the time. Like nearly every non-PPV, Survivor Series Showdown ‘93 was taped a couple of weeks in advance. That was normally not a problem, except in this case, Jerry Lawler was charged with rape claims, forcing the WWE to pull him from Survivor Series and hastily replace him with Shawn Michaels as the leader of the team that would face Bret, Owen, and the rest of the Harts at the PPV. Not only did the WWE have to quickly edit out a Jerry Lawler vs Owen Hart match that was taped for Survivor Series Showdown, but they also had to edit out Lawler coming out to the ring to try and interfere. So in actuality, Owen Hart’s entrance was actually taken from earlier in the taping for the Lawler match and that was spliced in the Yoko/Bret match while purposely trying to avoid showing Owen attacking Lawler. So the actual finish makes sense, but due to Jerry Lawler’s legal troubles, the WWE had to edit it to try and remove Lawler, causing the finish to make little sense.

Back from commercial and we head back to both sets of commentators for the final hype job for Survivor Series 1993. They’re eventually interrupted by Men on a Mission with a special Survivor Series rap.

Overall
Especially in the last couple of years, it’s pretty common for major changes to occur in the WWE to affect Survivor Series in the weeks leading up to the PPV. Yet, AJ Styles winning or losing the WWE Title and Becky Lynch getting hurt is nothing compared to the sheer mayhem that the WWE endured in the lead up to Survivor Series 1993. All of these changes forced Survivor Series Showdown 1993 to become a highly important show in terms of explaining the changes. The Jerry Lawler rape accusation forced the WWE to pull him out of his planned match with his Knights against the Hart Family at Survivor Series. At the taping for this Showdown, he had wrestled Owen Hart, forcing the WWE to edit out the match, edit the Yoko/Bret match to remove him, and then to film a last minute skit with Shawn Michaels and Rio Rogers to explain why Michaels and Bret are now at odds. As interesting as it is seeing this show pop up on the WWE Network, I would have been even more interested in seeing the never before seen original version of this event with the Lawler/Owen match. The Survivor Series main event of The Foreign Fanatics vs The All Americans was a match built around replacements and it was how they hyped this match all throughout the show. Granted, once Crush was added to the match, it made little sense that The Undertaker had been Tatanka’s replacement when Randy Savage would have made much more sense. Not only had Savage been fired as a commentator, but he was now engaged in a program with Crush. But wait, Savage is going to be a last minute replacement at Survivor Series, but replacing Mr. Perfect after his insurance deal forced him to leave wrestling again. Did it make any sense for Savage to be on Team Razor against Team IRS? Absolutely not. In fact, I’d say based on the past, it would have made more sense for The Undertaker to be on Team Razor since he had just recently wrapped up a year+ feud against Harvey Wippleman’s clients. Team IRS had someone Wippleman managed! But ultimately, Taker was inserted into the main event instead, which did help set-up the Taker/Yoko program, so I suppose it had a purpose. The main event of Survivor Series Showdown 1993 is the only match worth watching. If you don’t own the Bret Hart Blu-ray, where I originally reviewed the match, check out this match on the WWE Network on the Showdown. Ultimately, as much as I’m thankful that the WWE Network has uploaded one of these pre-PPV specials, I’m left scratching my head why they picked this one. An earlier Survivor Series Showdown had a much clearer theme. But hey, I finally got my wish of one of these specials on the WWE Network. Woo!

[Shock]

Bastion Booger is to me what Damien Mizdow is to you. I love bad things in wrestling, but I think he's the one guy I just refuse to watch again.

Yokozuna and Bret had good chemistry together. I must have seen this match if you say it's on one of his dvds but I don't remember it.

Sent from my Moto E (4) Plus using Tapatalk

[Jim]

Bastion Booger is to me what Damien Mizdow is to you. I love bad things in wrestling, but I think he's the one guy I just refuse to watch again.

But unlike Mizdow, Booger never really did much. Even if you refuse to watch any of his matches, what are you really missing? One PPV match and a handful of Raw matches. Meanwhile, Mizdow was involved in many championship matches, whether directly or indirectly, and I believe on every PPV during his run.

Yokozuna and Bret had good chemistry together. I must have seen this match if you say it's on one of his dvds but I don't remember it.

It's on The Dungeon Collection DVD, but only as a Blu-Ray extra.

[Jim]

Velocity
December 17, 2005

You can find this full edition of Velocity in the hidden gems section of the Network where it’s titled “Up Next”. For whatever reason, it doesn’t state that it’s a Velocity episode.

Since October 2005, WWE Velocity has been a WWE.com exclusive since WWE switched back from Spike TV to the USA Network, with USA not interested in HEAT or Velocity. Unlike HEAT, which lasted a few years on WWE.com, Velocity would be cancelled in mid 2006 with the launch of WWECW.

For context sake, this is the Velocity go home show for Armageddon.

William Regal w/Paul Burchill vs Scotty
Believe it or not, but these two actually had a bit of a program in mid 2005. Following the 2005 Draft, a babyface Regal was sent to Smackdown where he quickly found himself the target of Smackdown’s newest faction - The Mexicools. With Scotty also having issues with The Mexicools, a tag match was booked on Smackdown that resulted in Regal walking out on his partner, turning heel in the process. Burchill was then introduced as Regal’s new partner with the two Brits beating Scotty a couple of times on Smackdown before they moved on to other things. In these later years of Scotty’s career, it always impresses me just how popular Scotty is. He’s a perfect guy to put in an opening match because he gets and maintains a reaction despite the fact that he’s an easy person to beat. The match is just fine as Regal worked over Scotty some. When Scotty looked to take over, Burchill attempted to run in, but Scotty side stepped in, causing Burchill to fly out of the ring. The distraction was still effective though as Regal is quickly able to surprise Scotty with a Knee Trembler for the victory. What stood out about this match the most was Josh Matthews’ commentary. In hyping Bobby Lashley, since he’s feuding with Regal/Burchill, he claims that no one has been able to beat Lashley so far. In fact, “I don’t even think Lashley could beat Lashley!” The fuck does that even mean? Anyways, this match just served as a reminder that the WWE had a fun team in Regal/Burchill, but proceeded not to do anything worthwhile with them. **

We’re joined in process from Smackdown with Batista and Rey Mysterio beating MNM for the WWE Tag Titles. Moving on!

Jamie Noble vs Tommaso Whitney
Noble just returned to the WWE days ago with this being his first televised match. To think, one of the best wrestlers of 2005 is now just wrestling on Velocity. Meanwhile, his jobber opponent, Whitney, is one of the reasons for this episode of Velocity being added to the WWE Network. Whitney only began wrestling at the start of 2005 with this being his first ever televised match in the WWE. With his long black hair and red trunks, Whitney looks like a taller version of Nunzio. Matthews hypes this as Noble’s return match after spending a lot of time in New Japan Pro Wrestling. Noble looked good out here in this squash, working a really physical style and borrowing from Roddy Strong with the fireman’s carry into the gut buster followed up with a low sick kick. Noble would force Whitney to tap out with an inverted guillotine choke. I know if it was up to me, I would have pushed Noble in 2006. As for Whitney, maybe he needs to become a bit more evil if he wants to succeed in the WWE. SQUASH.

Paul London and Brian Kendrick vs Arch Kincaid and Scotty Charisma
Much like Jamie Noble, Kendrick left the WWE in 2004, worked the indies and Japan, before re-signing with the WWE in the second half of 2005. He’s been back for a few months now. After initially wrestling London on an episode of Velocity, the two quickly began to team up as a plucky underdog tag team that was kept nearly entirely on Velocity. Kincaid was a wrestler from the New England area. Never really made a name for himself, but you’d often see him pop up on HEAT or Velocity in 2003-2005 whenever the WWE was in the area. Same thing can be said about Charisma, except this is the start of his jobbing occasionally on WWE TV while Kincaid was finishing up. Londrick just recently altered their look, ditching the trunks in favor of their signature pleather shorts. So you can tell that they’re trying to find a way to make their new team more marketable. Poor Charisma spent the majority of the match just being assaulted by the babyface team before a distraction by Kincaid finally allowed him to tag out. Kincaid has a bit more success against London, but it doesn’t take long before the future WWE Tag Team Champions regains the control. Charisma would be sent out of the match with a double super kick while Kincaid suffers Londrick’s original tag finisher a Flatliner (Kendrick)/Enzuigiri kick (London) to get the victory. Much like Noble, I’m all for a push in 2005, but unlike with Noble, I would actually get to see Londrick pushed some. SQUASH.

Doug Basham vs Todd Hanson
YES! It’s a Basham Brother! Okay, here’s the deal. Following the 2005 Draft, Danny Basham was sent to Raw while Doug stayed on Smackdown. They were both given new gimmicks with Danny becoming a Raven-like character with the intention of going by his OVW name of Damaja. Meanwhile, Doug changed up his look and became The Bash Man - Doug Basham. But here’s why I’m so excited to see this. Although I was fully aware that the gimmick changes took place, but since Danny only lasted one televised match (Against some kid named Nigel McGuinness on HEAT) and Doug only lasted a few televised matches on Velocity, I never got to actually see the gimmicks. I assume it’s only a matter of time before Danny vs McGuinness neds up on the WWE Network as a new hidden gem. As for Hanson, he’s just another Northeastern indie wrestler who looks a bit like Rhyno. I think my favorite thing about this The Bash Man gimmick is that it wasn’t even explained what it’s about. He’s got fancier ring gear and looks like more of a star, but who is he supposed to be? Hanson managed to get in a couple of spots to show off his agility for being a big guy. Basham tried to be physical, but came across as a weaker version of Jamie Noble though. Hanson would attempt a sunset flip, but Basham would counter into an armbar to force the submission. The Bash Man would quickly find himself off of TV. As for Hanson, he’d probably look better if he shaved his head and grew a bad ass beard. SQUASH.

Orlando Jones w/Jillian Hall vs Funaki
Well, some Velocities in 2005 featured great matches like Regal vs Benoit or the Cruiserweights going crazy in spotfests and then there’s some Velocities where this is the main event. Despite this being star vs star, it’s not much more competitive than the three squash matches. OJ dominated, mostly by using the bearhug a couple of times. Funaki would get in a brief flurry of offense, but Jordan would silence him with a nice looking neckbreaker. One Black Ice (Carlito’s Backstabber) later and OJ wins. Too short to be bad, but I was hoping for at least a decent little main event, not a glorified squash. * ¾

Overall
Well, it’s Velocity. You win some, you lose some. This just happens to be the latter. These days, the episode stands out for Noble’s return and for the squashes of future NXT stars Hanson and Tommaso Ciampa. For me though, it’s more of a reminder of some of the lowcard stars that I really dug at the time, despite the WWE not doing anything with them (Regal/Burchill, Londrick, and Noble). Who knows, maybe this will be the start of Velocity coming to the WWE Network soon to be able to watch some of the standout matches like Regal/Benoit and Akio/London.

[Shock]

I love stuff like this where you see future stars in their jobber days. Or even better is when you get a guy that didn't actually make it in WWE on one of these random shows (like Christopher Daniels).

[Jim]

Superstars
April 18, 1992

This would be the first official episode of Superstars with all episode previous to this being called Superstars of Wrestling. Coidencedentaly, it was also in April 1992 that WCW renamed their World Championship Wrestling program to WCW Saturday Night.

Vince McMahon opens up the show with Mr. Perfect. Perfect is quick to bring up how stupid The Ultimate Warrior is for sticking his nose in Sid Justice’s business. This week we’ll see Money Inc, The Texas Tornado, Bret Hart, The Legion of Doom, and a special interview with The Ultimate Warrior.

The Legion of Doom w/Paul Ellering vs Duane Gill and Barry Hardy
At this point in time, Hardy and Gill are two of the more prominent jobbers you can see on WWE TV. Gill, of course, would later find popular as Gillberg. This would actually be Ellering’s first time managing LOD on WWE TV. At the sound of the bell, LOD predictably attacked the jobbers and began mauling them. We get an insert promo from The Beverly Brothers and The Genius where they call LOD and Ellering a bunch of sissies. Whoa...that’s pretty extreme, yo. Back to action and it’s not long before LOD delivers a Doomsday Device to the future WWE Light Heavyweight Champion for the victory. SQUASH.

Over at the Update with Mean Gene, he goes through the latest WWE Magazine starting with Randy Savage showing proof that Ric Flair’s original photos with Miss Elizabeth were doctored. We’re shown new photos with Savage and Elizabeth in the same poses that Flair’s fake photos were later posed in. We’re shown a clip from Wrestlemania 8 where Flair forcefully kissed Miss Elizabeth after losing the WWE Title, but Elizabeth shoved him away, leading to a brief pull apart between Savage and Flair.

The Repo Man vs Chris Hahn
Hahn looks a good deal like Lex Luger, if Luger wasn’t roid’d up like hell. Hahn was just a local wrestler from the midwest. Repo Man used an unique style of tossing Hahn in and out of the ring before starting a series of catapults into the bottom rope before finally putting Hahn out of his misery and pinning him. SQUASH

After the match, Repo Man wraps his rope around Hahn’s neck and pulls him around for a bit.

In the Event Center with Sean Mooney, we’re shown a recorded promo with The Big Boss Man. He cuts a generic promo about protecting people and the good people believing in him. We switch to a recorded promo from Rick Martel who also cuts a generic promo about his gimmick. Not much of an Event Center.

In a vignette, an altered voice issues a threat to The Big Boss Man while we’re shown images from a prison cell. Uh oh…

Bret Hart © vs Tom Bennett - Non-Title
Bennett looks a bit like Seth Rogen. The entire purpose of the match was to hype up the new IC Title program between Bret and Shawn Michaels. The commentators discussed Shawn for a bit before we get an insert promo from HBK and Sherri. Without Bennett getting in a single move, Bret forces him to submit to the Sharpshooter. SQUASH.

Back to Sean Mooney in the Event Center. He mentions how Bret Hart’s IC Title win has brought out a slew of new challengers. We get a recorded promo from The Mountie, wanting his former belt back again. Mountie even has a big surprise coming soon. We then hear from The Bushwhackers where they recount talking to Butch’s mom, letting her know that the WWE fans not only love their marching, but he thinks they love their licking too. Oh dear…

We’re shown a coming soon vignette promoting Crush. Crush explains how he got his name - he liked to crush things as a kid. Okay then.

The Berzerker w/Mr. Fuji vs Mark Roberts
At the start of the squash, Mr. Fuji cuts an insert promo challenging The Undertaker to a fight to his Berzerker. McMahon can’t believe that Berzerker would actually have the guts to face Taker. Berzerker quickly finishes Roberts with a power slam. As Berzerker was leaving, Mr. Perfect teases the idea of Berzerker using his sword on The Undertaker. Hmmm. SQUASH.

On the interview stage, Mean Gene is with a bunch of little warriors and brings out The Ultimate Warrior. The topic of the interview is his new issue with Sid Justice thanks to Warrior coming out to Hulk Hogan’s rescue at the end of Wrestlemania 8. Warrior claims you need friends to get by and that his little warriors give him strength.

Rick Martel vs Red Tyler
Tyler is a no good ginger. Unlike the other squashes so far, Tyler managed to get in a couple of hope spots including a nearfall. We get an insert video of a highlight from the latest WWE Magazine where Martel has an article. Back to action and Martel has things back under control before forcing Tyler to submit to the Boston Crab. SQUASH.

McMahon hypes the Coliseum Home Video release of Wrestlemania 8 including never before seen action! The tape is released this Thursday. Sean Mooney gives us a small preview of some of the extras including a costume contest and a charity rally featuring dancing from The Mountie, The Nasty Boys, Jimmy Hart, and Sherri.

The Texas Tornado vs Warren Bianchi
We’re sadly at the end of Von Erich’s run in the WWE with Tornado only have a few more TV matches after this. In a really depressing moment, we get an insert promo from The Texas Tornado where he promotes his return (He had been off of TV for a couple of months) and hypes the fact that he’s better than ever and will be dedicating his life to the WWE, his family, and religion. Tornado looked solid in this squash though as he quickly disposes of Bianchi and pins him with the Discus Punch. SQUASH.

We’re shown an ad hyping the weekly show of WBF BodyStars. Oh god.

Money Inc. © w/Jimmy Hart vs Jim Powers and Buck Zumhofe - Non-Title
Yikes. First episode of Superstars on the WWE Network and it features Zumhofe, a piece of shit rapist/pedophile. Since Powers is a JTTS and not a full fledged jobber, he’s allowed to get in some offense on IRS before tagging out to Zumhofe, but Buck quickly gets bested. We’re shown an insert promo from The Natural Disasters, continuing their program with Money Inc. DiBiase forced Zumhofe to submit to the Million Dollar Dream. During the match, we also got news that we will get Paul Bearer’s response to The Berzerker’s challenge to The Undertaker. SQUASH

Back to Event Center, we hear from Owen Hart, who is open to all challenges. We then hear from Papa Shango cutting a creepy promo.

To a proper taped promo, Paul Bearer and The Undertaker accept the challenge, seemingly hinting that it will take place next week.

We cut to another taped promo where Mr. Fuji claims Taker fell for his Berzerker’s plan.

McMahon and Perfect hypes next week’s episode of Superstars featuring Sgt. Slaughter, Shawn Michaels, Ric Flair, and the big match-up of The Undertaker vs The Berzerker.

Overall
It’s an episode of Superstars filled with squashes. It was what it was. They did a swell job at hyping up the upcoming Berzerker/Taker match, a match that is one of my fondest wrestling memories from my early childhood. There was also a lot of emphasis on the growing main event program of Sid Justice vs The Ultimate Warrior. Sadly, that wouldn’t result in anything worthwhile since Sid would leave the company by the end of April. In fact, Sid’s last televised match the following day with a taped match for Wrestling Challenge against a jobber and a match against The Undertaker at UK Rampage 1992, but the latter was only shown in England. Even though the matches couldn’t have been good, Sid/Warrior is not only a fresh match, but it feels pretty important. Elsewhere, this episode showcased the usual further highlighting of current feuds like HBK/Bret, Beverlies/LOD, and Money/Disasters.

[Jim]

Superstars
April 25, 1992

Vince McMahon opens up alone to discuss his broadcast partner, Mr, Perfect’s buddy, Ric Flair, and his growing problems with Randy Savage. McMahon quickly goes over what to expect tonight with The Berzerker vs The Undertaker, Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, and Shawn Michaels.

Ric Flair w/Mr. Perfect vs Ron Cumberledge
For a jobber, Cumberledge has a pretty good look. Going off of looks alone, give the guy a gimmick and he would have fit in just perfectly in the WWE as a regular wrestler. It’s really weird just seeing Flair work a weekly WWE program when by comparison, Hulk Hogan virtually never did. It’s been over two years since Hogan’s last weekly TV match! Poor Cumberledge doesn’t get in any offense before he’s forced to submit to the Figure Four. Thanks for coming, Ronnie. SQUASH.

Over at the Update with Mean Gene, he hypes the unseen WM 9 weekend footage that can only be seen on the Wrestlemania 8 Coliseum Home Video. That home video is now available! Looks like you can still snag that VHS on Amazon for just $20.

The British Bulldog vs Kevin Kruger
Kruger looks as if he could be in high school, but during his introduction, he acts a bit cocky, so he’s alright in my book. After missing the first match, Perfect joined McMahon to start commentating. Kruger (Also spelled Krueger on some sites) did some jobbing as late as 2003 on Velocity. It’s all Bulldog as he quickly destroys Kruger with the Running Power Slam for the win. SQUASH

It’s time to promote the WBF again with WBF BodyStars every Saturday morning on USA!

The Beverly Brothers w/The Genius vs Eric Collins and Mike Freedom
The Beverly Brothers’ theme song is so snazzy. The jobber team are the anti Ron Cumberledge with their looks. Freedom looks like a white man’s version of El Dandy while Collins resembles Fonzie if Fonzie was bulkier and had worse hair. We get an insert promo where The Beverly Brothers call Legion of Doom sissies again. Again, it’s an easy squash for the superstars with the Beverly Brothers winning by killing Collins with the Shaker Heights Spike (Launching Collins in the air and then spiking him in the mat). SQUASH

After the match, The Beverly Brothers hold Collins while The Genius rubs green face paint on the poor jobber to further build their issue with the Legion of Doom.

Over on the Event Center with Sean Mooney, we hear from some of the stars of the WWE. First up are The Legion of Doom and Paul Ellering. They talk about their masculinity, undoubtedly to make up for the fact that they’re sissies. The Repo Man talks about how the government is in bad shape and the people are struggling to pay their bills. He’s all in favor of taking everything so that everything can be his. Maybe The Repo Man can end this shutdown?

Another coming soon vignette is shown for Crush. This time we’re shown a flashback to Crush’s childhood where he sucked at pouring milk, but somehow he still managed to grow up strong. These coming soon vignettes are so bad for Crush.

Shawn Michaels w/Sherri vs George Anderson
Anderson is super pale. Unlike the other matches so far tonight, this one goes to the outside for a bit with Sherri distracting Anderson to allow Michaels to deliver a double ax handle from the apron. We get an insert promo with Bret Hart bringing up Michaels’ challenge last week and is determined never to let HBK tarnish the IC TItle by getting his hands on it. After a super kick, Michaels would finish Anderson off with the Tear Drop Suplex for the win. So far the most fun squash today. SQUASH.

Back to the Event Center with Mooney. We hear from The Texas Tornado. So many wrestlers fight for the wrong reasons, but him, he’s fighting for all of the right things in life. The Nasty Boys and Jimmy Hart gloat about rising back to the top of the tag ranks. Gee, I sure hope that doesn’t cause problems with Hart’s other tag team - Money Inc.

Sgt. Slaughter vs The Brooklyn Brawler
Slaughter’s at the end of his full time in-ring career with the WWE. His tag team with Jim Duggan has quietly wrapped up until being removed from TV in a few months where he’d be a kayfabe WWE official. He’s still got one more memorable angle left in him before he’s done though. In an insert promo, Sgt. Slaughter brings up his current feud with The Mountie while continuing to beat up on The Brawler, even leapfrogging him at one point. A Cobra Clutch would force the submission for Slaughter. I’m actually surprised that Brawler didn’t get in any offense. SQUASH.

During the previous match, it’s also briefly mentioned that a certain prisoner from The Big Boss Man’s past will be released soon.

On the interview stage, Mean Gene brings out Sid Justice and Harvey Wippleman. Sid laughs off The Ultimate Warrior’s last week’s claim that you need friends to get by in life. Sid doesn’t need any friends! Sid reminds Warrior that Warrior saved Hulk Hogan during his last match, but he has one question for Warrior - who is going to save Warrior? Sid Justice rules this world~! Again, this program would prematurely come to an end with Sid’s release.

In the ring, The Fink announces to the arena that Shawn Michaels has left the building!

The Natural Disasters vs Kent Carlson and Tom Stone
Oddly, it’s pretty much all Earthquake and Carlson. Stone never even legally tags in. Granted, I don’t mind at all seeing Quake instead of Typhoon. The one time Stone does jump into the ring to try and help his partner, he’s jumped by Typhoon causing The Natural Disasters to spash both jobbers in the corner. An Earthquake Splash to Carlson allows for Typhoon to hit his Tidal Wave (Bounce off of the ropes and splash) on Carlson to get the win. During the match was an insert promo from Money Inc where they just gloated about leaving Wrestlemania 8 with the WWE Tag Titles. SQUASH.

Back to the Event Center. We hear from Skinner who claims he’s been having to prove himself ever since coming to the WWE and he’s been doing just that. Dude...your team got swept at Survivor Series, you lost an IC Title match at This Tuesday in Texas, you lasted 2 minutes in the Royal Rumble, and you got beaten at Wrestlemania 8 with Owen not even hitting a single offensive move. If this is you proving your doubters wrong, I’d hate to see how you’d perform while failing. Meanwhile, Tatanka talks about his success thus far in the WWE and thanks the fans for their support while he continues to try and improve. See, Tatanka has reason to brag. The dude’s undefeated. Skinner could learn a little something from Tatanka. And now I oddly want to see Tatanka vs Skinner.

The Undertaker w/Paul Bearer vs The Berzerker w/Mr. Fuji
Aw yeah. This was set-up last week in the biggest development. Strangely, there’s not been much promotion for this match throughout the show. This was pure chaos with Fuji stealing the urn before the bell and knocking Bearer out of the ring. Berzerker would use his shield to try and attack Taker, but it wouldn’t keep Taker down for long. Berzerker would pull out his viking sword and leap to the mat missing Taker and instead stabbing the ring. The fighting went to the outside where Fuji was throttled by Taker. That gave Berzerker time to pull up the mats so that he could deliver a piledriver on the cement. With Fuji pushing Berzerker to the back, Bearer was able to re-obtain the urn, bringing his Undertaker back to life, following The Berzerker to the back. We ended up not getting a proper match, but boy was this fun. It’s the Superstars match I remember the best from 1992 and now it’s still a really fun angle. For whatever reason, while these two would work a ton of house show matches together, by time Taker was ready for Summerslam, he’d be moved into a program with Kamala rather than working with Berzerker. So if you wanted to see a proper match between Taker and Berz, you’d have to find a few meetings on Coliseum Home Video. Awesome angle though. ANGLE.

With this being a new era of Superstars, there’s a new weekly segment of the Featured Match. Taker vs Berzerker was the first week of this. It’s revealed that next week’s featured match will be The Ultimate Warrior vs “Proving his doubters wrong” Skinner. We hear from both men to hype up that match with Warrior wanting to remind everyone what the Warrior can do.

The show closes with a replay of the sword going into the mat from this week’s featured match.

Overall
It’s the episode where The Berzerker plunges a sword into the ring mat. It doesn’t matter what else happened on this show. It’s a great show. As it was typical for the time period, there’s not a lot that felt different about these individual episodes from week to week. It’s all about highlighting the 4-5 programs each week. Normally, that means hearing from one wrestler the first week and then the rival the following week. If you were just interested in following along in 1992 to see what were the various programs, you can probably get away with watching one Superstars episode a month. But again, this episode featured The Berzerker stabbing the ring with a fucking sword. Forget NBC. This was must see TV.

For fun, especially if I keep going and watching all of these 1992 Superstars that’s on the WWE Network, here’s my made up PPV card had the WWE ran monthly PPVs back then. These will always come at the end of the month and will focus on what the WWE was booking, not what I wanted to see:

Backlash 1992

Spoiler:

WWE World Title
Randy Savage © vs Ric Flair

WWE Tag Titles
Money Inc © vs The Natural Disasters

WWE IC Title
Bret Hart © vs Shawn Michaels

The Ultimate Warrior vs Sid Justice

The Undertaker vs The Berzerker

The Beverly Brothers vs The Legion of Sissies

Sgt. Slaughter vs The Mountie

The British Bulldog vs The Repo Man or Skinner

Debut of Nailz in attack of The Big Boss Man?