Pickup Lines that WONT Work

Angelique

1. If you and I were squirrels,could I bust a nut in your hole?

2. I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.

3. If it's true that we are what we eat,I could be you by morning!

4. How do you like your eggs: poached,scrambled,or fertilized?

5. I was about to go masturbate and I needed a name to go with your face.

6. You are so fine that I'd eat your shit just to see where it came from.

7. My love for you is like diarrhea,I just can't hold it in.

8. Roses are red.Violets are blue.I like spaghetti.Let's go fuck.

9. Is that a keg in your pants? 'Cause I would love to tap that ass!

10.If your right leg was Thanksgiving,and your left leg was Christmas, could I meet you between the holidays?

11. You remind me of a championship bass,I don't know whether to mount you or eat you!

12. Your parents must! be retarded,because you are special.

13. Could I touch your belly button.....from the inside?

14. I'm not too good at algebra,but doesn't U+I = 69?

15. How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I'll give you the meat.

16. Guy: "Would you like to dance?"
Girl: "I don't care for this song and surely wouldn't dance with you."
Guy: "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants"

17. I'm new in town,could I have directions to your house.

18. Fuck me if I'm wrong,but is your name Yolanda?

19. I love every bone in your body - especially mine.

20. You might not be the best looking girl here,but beauty is only a light switch away.

21. Hey baby,what's your sign? Caution,slippery when wet,dangerous curves ahead,yield?

22. I can't find my puppy,can you help me find him? I think he went into this motel room.

23. Wanna play Pearl Harbor?....Its a game where I lay back while you blow the hell out of me.

24. Your body's name must be Visa,because it's everywhere I want to be.

25. Can I buy you a drink,or do you just want the money?

-3:16-

^That one's the best...or worst shall I say. Lol.

God

Super Moderator

I see Mikk has been coming on to you a lot then.

Angelique

lol ... best line that works for me yet ... so that gold label tequila u want or black label!! ;)

James Deuce

WC Moderator

I could see these being used by Quagmire on Family Guy. Haha.

Angelique

Giggity!

whisper in the wind

the best is someones farted, lets get out of here