horrorfan_1986

WWE Royal Rumble
January 25, 2004

Heat

Molly Holly vs Victoria
Victoria still has the awesome Tatu music and is with Stevie Richards. She's in the process of turning face though. Holly is the Women's champion, but the title isn't on the line. Victoria has a side headlock on Molly for a while. I'm beginning to have my doubts this will be any good. Molly snapmares Victoria and hits a sliding dropkick. Holly rips at the mouth of Victoria. Handspring elbow gets Holly a two. Molly gets another two after slamming Victoria's face to the mat a couple of times. Victoria counters a neckbreaker with one of her own. Oklahoma gets Victoria a two count. Another rollup by Victoria. Molly runs into a pair of straight punches. Victoria connects with a standing moonsault. More face slamming by Molly. Holly climbs to the top rope, but Victoria hits the rope causing Molly to loose her balance. Victoria pulls Molly off of the top rope right into the Widow's Peak for the victory. Well it looks like they heard my fears and changed the match completely. Almost a Japanese style pacing during the match with technical wrestling to start, a lot of quick falls then an exciting finish. They could only do so much with the little amount of time they had, but they made it work. These two were easily the two best women wrestlers of the WWE this decade. They seemed very comfortable being able to wrestle against someone who they didn't need to carry. At this point, I'm longing for a 15-20 minute PPV match with these two from around this time. Unfortunately, besides digging through my Raw 2004 VHS collection, the only other match to see is their Wrestlemania bout that was given the same amount of time as this was. Pity. 5 Minutes. 2 1/2 Stars.

PPV

Ric Flair and Batista (c) vs The Dudley Boyz - Tag Team Titles Tables Match
The Dudz seemingly retained their tag titles after a Gauntlet match at Armageddon until Eric Bischoff sent out Flair and Batista as their final test. Evolution won and spoiled the night for the Dudleys. Due to the fact I didn't have cable from post Survivor Series 2003 until a few days before Wrestlemania XX, I'm not sure what all happened in the build to this rematch. The rules of the match is that only one member of a team needs to be put through a table for the match to end. Coach talks about the Dudley Boyz 3Ding him through a table on the last Raw. Brawl on the outside to start. Flair takes a back body drop on the floor. Has Flair ever had a match where he didn't take a back body drop? Batista misses a punch on Bubba and nails the post. Bubba pulls out a table from the opposite side of the ring and slides it all the way across the ring to hit Batista. Nice. Flair is caught on the top rope by D-Von and is sent flying back down to the mat. The Dudley's sets up the table in the middle of the ring, but The Coach hits the ring. He's easily overpowered by the Duds. WAZZUP Drop to The Coach. Flair throws Bubba out of the ring, but takes a falling top rope closeline from D-Von. D-Von turn around right into a Spinebuster through the table by Batista for the win. That's it? In many ways, a wrestling match is like sex. However, if the first thing the woman says after you're done is "That's it?", you know you sucked. I hate the one member only rule and it doesn't help that the match was over before it really got going. Batista was still very reckless at this stage of his career. I'm shocked that no one was injured from how sloppy this one was. I would of much rather this match traded places with the Women's match. Fun Facts - This would be the fifth and final Royal Rumble match for the Dudley Boyz. Every single match they had at the PPV was for the tag titles and was the opening match. Interestingly, their wins depended on whether the year was odd or even. On even years, they would lose. However, odd years, they would win the Tag Titles. 4 Minutes. 1 Star.

Rey Mysterio (c) vs Jamie Noble w/Nidia - Crusierweight Title
Nidia is still blind from Tajiri's late 2003 black mist attack. Noble has started using her blindness to help him win matches turning him back heel. Fast start. Noble counters a 619 attempt with a high press. Stun Gun gets Noble a 2 count. Noble runs through Mysterio with a closeline. Another 2 count by Noble. Noble goes back to what works best for him by doing a kneeling abdominal stretch. Mysterio blocks a second high press with a dropkick. Bulldog gets Mysterio 2. Shots of Nidia trying to listen carefully to the match. Noble does for the Gibson Driver, but Mysterio blocks it. Jamie hits the ropes, but Nidia trips him up. 619 and Rey Drops the Dime to pin Noble and retains the CW title. Way too short. New idea, just scrap the tables match completely and give Mysterio vs Noble the entire first 20 minutes of the show. The match was non-stop action, but there just wasn't enough time to make it anything special. Sadly, I'm sure you can find several longer matches of theirs on SD from throughout the years. For whatever reason, these two have only wrestled twice since Noble returned to the WWE at the end of 2005. 4 Minutes. 1 1/2 Stars.

Eddie Guerrero vs Chavo Guerrero w/Chavo Sr.
This is the culmination of a long buildup. After Chavo returned to SD in 2003 after an injury, Los Guerreros quickly won back the tag titles. However, Eddie's luck ran out as he would lose both the tag and US titles in the same week. Chavo began blaming Eddie for everything. Kurt Angle stepped in to help the Guerreros come back together. During a rematch against The Bashams, Chavo allowed the Bashams to double team Eddie. After the match, Chavo attacked Eddie, busting him open. Chavo Sr. would come into the feud as the one Guerrero who was on Chavo's side. Slow start with a couple of collar elbow tie ups that ends in a stalemate. Some chops and Eddie goes to Chavo's eyes. Chavo Sr. throws Eddie into the steps. Chavo lays in a lot of forearms. Eddie takes over with the Three Amigos and finishes Chavo off with the Frogsplash to win the match. Post-match has Eddie attacking both Chavo's. Chavo Sr. is lowblowed and is tied to the bottom rope by his necktie. Chavo Jr. blades after several punches. Well that was pointless. After months of build, the big blow off was nothing more then a lot of stalling followed by an out of nowhere win by Eddie. This shouldn't have even been wasted on PPV. With this kind of build, they should of had Chavo win the first match by cheating. Either delay Eddie's title win or have Eddie luck out and get a title shot at No Way Out and continue the feud after Eddie won the belt. Looking back, the sole purpose of this feud seemed to be to give Kurt Angle a reason to feud with Eddie. Even then, it didn't make a whole lot of sense. As for Chavo, after getting squashed, he gets pushed at the next PPV by winning the CW title. Boring and pointless. 8 Minutes. 1 3/4 Stars.

Brock Lesnar (c) vs Hardcore Holly - WWE World Title
September 2002 - Brock Lesnar breaks Hardcore Holly's neck. November 2003 - Hardcore Holly returns looking for revenge against Brock Lesnar. This is now the culmination of the feud. Holly jumps Lesnar on the outside to start the match. A lot of back-and-forth meaningless brawling in the ring. Alabama Slam by Holly. Holly attempts to lock in the dreaded Full Nelson (His temporary finisher), but Lesnar powers out of it. Lesnar throws Holly up into the F5 and pins Holly to retain his title. Yet another grudge feud that resulted in a short, meaningless match that ended very abruptly. Although the feud had a purpose, I don't think anyone believed Holly had a chance. I can remember thinking back when the feud began that as long as they kept the feud on Smackdown only, I wouldn't have a problem with it. This was nothing more than a chance to have Lesnar look good going into Wrestlemania. The only problem is after spending the past year defeating the likes of The Big Show, The Undertaker and Kurt Angle, defeating Holly meant as much as defeating a local jobber. The only redeeming aspect of this feud was the fact that Lesnar was scared of Holly.
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7 Minutes. 1 1/4 Stars.

Triple H (c) vs Shawn Michaels - Last Man Standing World Heavyweight Title
Their 2002 feud was reignited on the last edition of Raw in 2003. From San Antonino, Texas, Shawn Michaels wrestled Triple H in what is regarded as one of the best free TV matches of 2003. While he didn't win the title (I seem to remember some sort of Dusty finish), Michaels did earn a rematch. The WWE is following the rules that you do not need to be pinned for the referee to count. Michaels locks in the Figure Four early on. Hunter gets to the ropes, but the ref chooses to ignore him. Michaels pulls Hunter away and Jim Ross mentions how Hunter can't tap out, so he must get to the ropes. I guess someone forgot to mention that to Earl Hebner. Mindless fighting for the next few minutes. Michaels goes for a springboard crossbody on Hunter on the outside, but Hunter moves out of the way and Michaels crashes through the announce table. Michaels is bleeding badly. I love it whenever a wrestler blades deep when the move doesn't even look like it'd cause any blood. The match grows even more tiresome as Michaels on woozy legs keeps teasing defeat, only to get on his feet before the 10 count. Hunter nails the Pedigree, but the bloodied Michaels gets up at 9. Hebner isn't even caring if a wrestler is on their feet or not. As long as their backs aren't on the mat, he calls off the count. Michaels suprises Hunter with the Sweet Chin Music, but collapses. Hebner gets to 8 while Michaels tries to get up, but falls back to the mat. Hebner gets to 10 with both men still on the mat. And the result of the Last Man Standing Match is a draw. The fans instantly starts booing and chanting 'Bullshit'. Jim Ross tries to twist it around by saying the fans are just upset that Michaels didn't get up. Err no, Jimmy. They're pissed because they paid a lot of money for tickets and you just screwed them out of a real finish. Just about as paint by numbers as you can get. After such a badly worked match, they went the very risky approach of going for the draw. That's such a terrible thing to do on PPV. It worked for Mankind vs The Rock (St. Valentine's Massacre) because that was just one small chapter in a short amount of time. Plus, the WWE was offering the rematch the very next night. And even then with a great match, the fans booed. So really, if the fans booed at the end of Rock vs Mankind, what was Vince thinking by agreeing to this finish? It's bad enough that the Raw main event has been terrible on PPV for the entire year of 2003. But to start off the year with a non-finish was just BS. By this point, Michaels and Hunter made it clear that they needed some serious help if they were going to stretch the feud out any longer than it already was. Luckily, for us, the WWE realized that and by the next night, they had the answer to their problem. Hands down, their worst match together up to this point. But at least this given some time. 23 Minutes. 2 Stars.

The Royal Rumble Match
In the leadup to the Rumble, John Cena and Chris Benoit defeated the FBI to earn spots in the match. Smackdown GM, Paul Heyman wasn't so willing to help Benoit out any more than possible, so he made Benoit the number 1 entry. Over on Raw, Goldberg won a battle royal to be the number 30 entry. Meanwhile, Kurt Angle has dedicated his win to all of the armed forced. The commentating team is Raw's Jim Ross and Smackdown's Tazz. Chris Benoit comes out awaiting number 2. Randy Orton ends up picking the number 2 spot. Easily one of the better opening pairings in Rumble history. Both men takes their time before tying up. Benoit takes the advantage early on with boots and his trademark running forearms. Orton takes over with some stomps and tries to throw Benoit out. Benoit sends Orton to the ropes and gives him a knee. Mark Henry is out at number 3. Henry goes after Benoit. The question is will Henry and Orton work together? They were teammates at Survivor Series. Henry answers my question by choking out Orton. Benoit and Henry are fighting in the corner as Tajiri comes out to receive a boot from Orton. Bad mistake. Orton takes a few trademark roundhouse kicks. Benoit deems Tajiri unworthy so he gives him a pair of German Suplexes. Raw guys are paired off with Raw and SD with SD. Henry thinks he's eliminated Orton, but Randy Pearl Harbors the big man. Bradshaw comes out as number 5. JBL gives the Closeline From Hell to the heels and Tajiri. He tries it on Benoit, but Benoit counters it into the Crossface. JBL forces himself to his feet to try and toss Benoit out, Benoit hangs on and JBL ends up falling out of the ring as the first elimination. Rhyno comes out next and goes right after his former best friend, Chris Benoit. Tajiri fails at trying to give the Tarantula to Henry. Rhyno GORES Henry which causes Tajiri to be knocked out. Benoit hits the ropes and hits Henry out of the ring. Benoit is 2-0 against the big men. Matt Hardy V.1 is out next and goes after Benoit. Hardy lays in the blows against Orton and Rhyno. Sign Effect to Rhyno. Benoit instantly grabs Hardy and narrowly throws him out. Orton and Benoit continues their fighting while Rhyno tries to eliminate Hardy. Countdown begins again leading to Scott Steiner coming out. On the plus side, he can't be much worse than the previous year. Everyone runs into a Steinerline. Suplex to Orton. Twisting Belly-to-Belly to Benoit. T-Bone to Rhyno. Steiner's on fired. Which means...Benoit lays in the German Suplexes to Steiner. JR reminds us that there aren't any previous winners in this Rumble. Matt Morgan comes out at 9. Morgan goes after Benoit and gives him a twisting Sitdown Powerbomb. Hardy takes a big boot from Morgan. Morgan can't get enough of the shoulderblocks in the corner. The Hurricane is the final entrant in the first third. Hurricane flies in the air landing on Hardy. Morgan no sells the punches and tosses Hurricane out of the ring. So long Helms, thanks for making an appearance. Hardy is almost eliminated by Morgan. Hardy has been the new Michaels or Hunter as far as somehow always staying in.

Number 11 is Booker T with his terrible remix theme music. Booker and Steiner fights it out renewing their WCW feud. Hmm...I don't hear any "Dubya See Dubya" chants. Booker nails a Scissors kick to Orton. Pryo goes off signaling the entrance for Kane. Booker tosses out Steiner. Kane chokeslams Benoit. Chokeslam to Morgan. Rhyno takes a boot when he attempts a Gore on Kane. Chokeslam to Orton. Countdown ends and we hear the bell tones of the Undertaker. Kane yells at the entrance only to have Booker T toss him out. Spike Dudley comes out making Kane think he's the one behind the gong of the bell. Kane chokeslams Spike on the entrance ramp. Rikishi is number 14 which means Spike is officially eliminated. Rhyno runs at Benoit, but Benoit back drops Rhyno out of the ring. Could we call that 3-0 for Benoit? Rikishi is paired with the large Morgan. Rene Dupree finishes off the first half of the entrants. Dupree Stun Guns Hardy and dropkicks Matt out of the ring. Rikishi superkicks Dupree out. 5 men are currently in the ring - Benoit, Orton, Rikishi, Booker and Morgan. A-Trains runs out to collide with Rikishi. That's 4-2 in SD's advantage. Morgan tries to give Benoit a big boot, but Benoit ducks and then hits Morgan out of the ring. 4-0. Orton surprises Rikishi by tossing him out. Orton continues by eliminating Booker. Countdown begins bringing out Shelton Benjamin. Benoit eliminates A-Train. 5-0. Orton lays in some European Uppercuts to Shelton. Benjamin comes back, but misses a kick allowing Orton to eliminate him. We're down to only Benoit and Orton, numbers 1 and 2. Saito Suplext to Orton. Double KO spot. Out comes some guy with a wig introducing Ernest 'The Cat' Miller. Lamont (Wig dude) and The Cat dances in the ring while Benoit and Orton are still down on the mat. Benoit apparently doesn't like wigs as he tosses Lamont out. Orton eliminates The Cat. And just like that, the Cat's WWE career is over. Thank-God. Kurt Angle comes in at number 19. Loud 'You Suck' chants. Angle dedicated his victory to the men and women of the armed forces. Benoit chops away at Angle. Angle gives Benoit a snap suplex. Angle attempts to eliminate Benoit. Rico finishes off the second third of the Rumble. Sadly, Miss Jackie doesn't stay out. Orton and Rico trades blows in the middle of the ring. RKO to Rico. Benoit gives Angle the triple German suplexes. Orton presses Rico out of the ring. Benoit goes up for the Flying Headbutt, but Angle catches him crotching him.

Test's music hits for number 21. He's nowhere to be found though. RKO to Angle. Benoit and Angle are down. Cut to backstage, Test is down out cold. Steve Austin talks to someone ordering them to take Test's place and get to the ring. Cue Mick Foley's music. Oh SHIT. Foley is coming for Randy Orton. Trading blows Orton and Foley gets the crowd on their feet. Trademark Foley punches in the corner. Cactus Closeline to eliminate Orton and himself, leaving only Angle and Benoit. Foley smashes Orton's face against the steel steps. Mick wraps a camera cord around the throat of Orton. Christian comes out at number 22. Foley smashes official, Finlay with the stairs. Orton bashes Foley's brains in with a chair. Mick pulls out Mr. Socko. Nunzio comes out and gets a taste of Mr. Socko. Orton gives a low blow to Foley allowing Nunzio to escape. Nunzio sits down at ringside, not getting in the ring. Angle gives a German Suplex to Benoit and Cage. The Big Show is out next. Show looks huge compared to nowadays. JR reminds us of the past success of big men winning the Rumble (Big John Studd in '89 and Yokozuno in '93). Chris Jericho makes it number 25, leaving only five more. Jericho and Cage lays in the kicks on Angle. Jericho gives some chops to Show only to get a giant chop in return. Cage jumps on the back of Show. Everyone is now trying to eliminate Show. Show over powers everyone. Charlie Haas is out next. Lets see if he can last longer than his partner. Let's see...it's now 4-2 (5-3 if you count Nunzio) with SD having the advantage. Jericho back body drops Christian for the second year in a row. Angle gives Haas a German Suplex. Billy Gunn makes his return from yet another injury. Fame-Ass-Er to Angle and Jericho. Gunn gives the Fame-Ass-Er to his old Show Gunns partner. More shots of Nunzio watching the Rumble. Benoit German Suplexes Jericho. John Cena gets number 28. Show awaits his rival in the ring. Cena spots Nunzio on the outside. Cena throws Nunzio in the ring. Nunzio and Show double teams Cena. Big chop to Cena. Nunzio tries eliminating Show. Rob Van Dam, Mr. "Is this a one shot deal" heads out to the ring. With only one man left, these are the final 10. Haas chokes away at Jericho. Gunn tries to eliminate Show. Cena gives Angle an FU. Number 30 is Goldberg. So a quick rundown - Goldberg, Jericho and RVD for Raw. Benoit, Gunn, Nunzio, Angle, Haas, Cena and Show for SD. Gunn takes a spear. Goldberg pushes Haas out of the ring with Nunzio on his back. 9 left. HUGE SPEAR to Nunzio. Goldberg closelines Gunn out. 8 left. Goldberg presses Nunzio out of the ring. 7. Goldberg looks to give the Jackhammer to Show, but Brock Lesnar runs in and gives Bill the F-5, thus officially starting their feud. Goldberg yells at Brock allowing Angle to sneak up and eliminate Goldberg. 6 left. 4-2 with SD's advantage. Everyone tries eliminating The Big Show. Show shoves everyone off. Show knocks everyone down. Lionsault to Show. 5 Star Frogsplash to the big man. Cena pumps up his kicks for the 5 Knuckle Shuffle. Flying HEADBUTT!!! Angle now directs traffic to use everyone to eliminate Show. The five men can't even lift Show. Show shoves everyone off. Cena is eliminated and has that nasty fall to the floor that was shown in the WWE 'Don't Try This At Home' videos. 5 left. RVD is thrown out by Show. Final Four. Jericho is tossed over the top rope by Show, but stays in. Jericho repeats the trick for a second time. Middle rope Bulldog by Jericho to Show. Jericho turns Show over in the Walls of Jericho. Show is tapping. Angle attacks Jericho. Show CHOKESLAMS JERICHO OUT OF THE RING! Final three. We have Angle, Show and Benoit. All SD guys. Jericho is the Raw winner, if there is such a thing. Show chokeslams Benoit. Angle Slam to Show. Benoit attacks Angle. Angle Slam to Benoit. Down goes the straps. Angle points to both men asking the fans who he should go after. Show goes for a chokeslam, but Angle reverses it into an Angle Lock. Show is screaming out in pain and tapping. Show forces himself over the top rope and back in under the bottom eliminating Angle. Angle is pissed. Final two. Show and Benoit are both former WCW Champions. Benoit gives Show a flying headbutt to a standing Show knocking him back into the ring from the apron. Show goes for the chokeslam, but Benoit counters it into the Crossface. Show taps out again. 'Benoit' chants starts growing. Show picks Benoit up and slams him back down to the mat. Benoit has now passed the one hour mark. The record for the Rumble is 64 minutes set by Flair in 1992. Show drops the strap. Show taunts Benoit as he presses him in the air. Benoit gets in a front facelock. Show forces Benoit on the apron, but Benoit wont let go. Show starts to leave his feet and the crowd is growing louder. Benoit is crawling more and more under the bottom rope while Show's feet lifts higher off of the mat. Benoit keeps pulling until Show finally loses the balancing act and falls out of the ring and is eliminated!!!! Benoit wins and proves to be a giant killer with a record of 6-0. Benoit's set to go to Wrestlemania XX. With the past couple years producing fairly unmemorable Rumbles, this finally gets another good Rumble in the books. While the first half had too many jobbers for my taste, the Benoit/Orton aspect helped that time period go by without it hurting the match too much. The final third was almost all top guys who could realistically win. The major story of the match was Benoit for the second year in a row saving a Rumble PPV by putting in a lot of effort to get out one great match. It's one of the reasons why it annoys me so much that the WWE has tried to erase Benoit from the history books. What Benoit did was a horrible unforgivable thing, but he was still the guy who went into terrible PPV's unwilling to let the fans go home without one match they could remember as being great. With the running storyline of Benoit (And earlier Benoit/Orton), this Rumble is one of the better ones. However, with so much crap in the early going, it's hard to really beat out the fantastic 1990 and 1992 Rumbles. It's pretty much a toss up between which was the best Rumble of this decade between 2001 and 2004. 62 Minutes. 4 Stars.

Overall
For the second year in a row, the Royal Rumble produces a terrible PPV outside of one match. The main problem with this one is that matches that needed longer time (Tables and CW match) doesn't get it while matches that needed to have a few minutes cut (WHT) doesn't. It was pretty obvious that things needed to be changed on Raw. While they had the star power, they had very few people who could actually produce a good match. Meanwhile, SD was loaded with talented wrestlers, but most who lacked the star power. The card is very deceiving. It looks pretty good on paper, but nothing outside of the Rumble match actually delivers. While the Rumble match is one of the better of the decade, the entire PPV is one of the worst Rumbles of this decade. All I have to say is thank-God for Benoit being booked on the show.

Best Match: The Royal Rumble match
Worst Match: Batista and Flair vs The Dudley Boyz

Sign of the Night: WC>All

Overall grade: D+

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King Steventon

YOUR THOUGHTS=MY THOUGHTS

I think you may have underated the Rumble itself, I think it's probably the best Rumble ever and even rewatching it is still pretty incredible. Probably the best booked match of the decade.

Chavo/Eddie was dull as shit, but I wouldn't say it was pointless as it was the win that set Eddie up forr his title shot. HHH/HBK was also a horrendous borefest. And yeah, the tables match was awful. One match show, but just about as good of a one match show as you'll ever see.

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horrorfan_1986

With such a long build, the match needed to be more than a virtual squash. Even though Chavo was always below Eddie, they should of been paired off as near equals due to Chavo's knowledge of Eddie (Think Owen vs Bret). I'm not saying Chavo should of won, but to have a squash made all of the past few months pointless in my eyes.

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Marketh.

I remember watching this PPV at the time and thinking it was very good. But then I watched it a year or so ago and thought very different. I agree that the Royal Rumble match was the only redeeming aspect of it.

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tom2cool

I dis-agree, i thaught this was a good rumble, better than 05, 07 and 08. I genrally thaught the last man standing match was good, but i havnt watched the match for a long time so i may have to re-check it out

i'l give this RR a C+ / B-

horrorfan_1986

Really? 2005 with the forgotten, but good Edge vs Michaels and the two title matches that was better than either World Title match on this show? 2007 with the fantastic Umaga vs Cena, the surprisingly good Kennedy vs Batista and a solid Hardyz vs MNM? Or 2008 which had an at least average across the board show?

2004 just has too much crap to be anywhere near as good as those other Rumble PPV's.

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tom2cool

Ok not 07, mistakn about that.
But 05, when i watched the whole thing live it bored me, not the actual rumble match but all the rest, it wasnt bad but it wasnt good.

About 04 i guess im being biast, as i lived for the HBK vs HHH feud at the time. I was a huge HBK mark at the time. And you gotta love the actual rumble match. Just loved the thing with foley and Mick Foley


EDIT: Just been watching some stuff on youtube on both Rumbles ( 04 and 05 ) 05 is genuinly alot better than 04. My bad...

Often when you say RR il just think of the actual rumble match