Felix

When I was younger, I had many close calls where I can honestly say "how the hell did I survive that???".

Once, a few friends and I thought it would be cool to attach a rope up in the treetops and extend it down to a stake in the ground, creating a zip line. Sounded fun at the time! We bough a $2.00 pulley, had some rock climbing rope which I knew without a doubt would hold us, and we tied this off way up in a tree and down to a wooden stake in the ground some 50 yards away.

First up was my friend Bill. With the rope threaded through the pulley and a nice handle attached to that, he took off. Made it half way down and the pin that held the pulley wheel broke, which was ok because there was still a metal shroud keeping him on the rope. Only thing that happened is he stopped mid way and had to drop about 10 feet to the ground.

With the pulley now broken, what were we to do. Bright idea #2... get dishrags, put Vaseline in the center of them, throw them over the rope and home on to each end. Surely this would work, but with Bill shaken up a bit from the pulley incident, I was the next test subject. First run, worked like a charm, only the speed in which I zipped down that line was so fast I slammed into the ground pretty hard.

We go into the garage and grab another piece of rope to attach to the other, making the run longer and not on such a steep angle. So now, unknown to us at the time, we've just added another element of danger. Can you guess what happens next?

I get to the top of the tree and all this time, my biggest concern is the rag burning in half and me dropping fro the sky. I seat myself in the platform we constructed at the top of the tree, throw the rag over the rope... and jump off... Immediately, I am plunging straight to the ground, and not at a angle but straight down. I hit every branch on the way down which is causing me to flip over and over before hitting the ground. Amazingly, I land on my feet but quickly collapse in severe pain.

My "friends" are laughing hysterically, I guess because I'm don't appear to have injured myself, I'm not screaming or moaning in pain... I just sit there with this look of shock as you can imagine.

So, what happened? When I stood up, the pain really kicked in. Turns out, when I landed on my feet, the pressure that went through my legs and to my pelvis caused it to break. That's right, I broke my ass. Not to mention, I'm 1/2 mile from home, no adults around, and have to walk home. I spent weeks having to sit on one of those donut pillows until my pelvis healed and when I was better, went back to measure the fall. 30 feet! Doesn't sound like much, but believe me, it was. Your home, if you live in a two story house is approx 9 ft per floor, so technically thats a three story fall.

There were other acts of stupidity too, but I'll let you share your story of stupidity with the rest of us before adding more of mine.

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Assassin™

Yeah, sorry, but I don't have any stories from when I was a youngin' that are quite that interesting. I use to skate, and I tried some pretty large jumps that I shouldn't have,and during the whole 'Jackass' era, one of my friends had a camera with which we filmed ourselves being jackasses (seriously, we were way funnier than Knoxville or Bam Margera), but I can't say that I've done anything life-threatening. I hung out with some twisted individuals who literally seemed liked they had a deathwish at times, but I wasn't much of a thrill-seeker myself.

When shit goes down, I'm usually the guy standing in the back somewhere laughing his ass off.

James Deuce

It was a long time ago, and doesn't really seem life threating anymore, but I thought it was at the time. Anyway, I was at a lake party, and we were playing on a tube, it flipped over and I was stuck underneath it. I wasn't a very good swimmer at the time, so I was flailing around like no tomorrow. I was screaming "Get me outta here!" It was quite the experience at the time.

Felix

I grew up in a new neighborhood where aot of construction was going on. I climbed up on a roof that was being sheathed in and someone forgot to nail down a piece of plywood. I ended up sliding off the roof of the house. Luckily, the back yard was a large hill that I fell against which lessened the overall fall.

We also had this thing where we would get on the roof of one anothers cars and see how fast we could drive through the mountain roads until you tapped out. My buddy got hit by a owl that had flown across the road and it knocked him off the car. I thought he would have surely been injured but some how he wasn't.

Guess we didn't have much to do when we were younger other than to get in some kind of trouble.

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Dakstang

When I was 5 years old I fell in the river behind my house. I would have drowned if my Dad hadn't been there and jumped in and pulled me out. He still had a hard time finding me though since the river was so muddy.

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There'll be no sorrow there, no more burdens to bear,
No more sickness, no more pain, no more parting over there;
And forever I will be with the One who died for me,
What a day, glorious day that will be.

Toaster Oven

I was the guy Assassin was laughing at tbh. Granted ours were more backyard wrestling esque as opposed to jackass.

I think the funniest one, and even when I look back on it was rather stupid to even think to do it. There was a stunt we did where I jumped off the garage roof(a good 20 foot jump) onto a table which my friend was lying on. Well I jumped and everything went to plan, except the table didn't break. Our crowd, maybe of fifty total people, of course only wanting us to hurt ourselves chanted for us to do it again, so we did. He remained "dazed" on the table, and I jumped again, well the table broke in two, and of course neither of us realized the weight that was about to hit the cold, unforgiving terrain below us, all in all, I ended up getting the wind completely knocked out of me(which I had never been so scared of in my life), breaking the lower half of my femur and sustaining a concussion which knocked me out cold.

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The Brain

Once I went swimming in the Atlantic off the coast of Virginia. The last time I had swum anywhere, I was in pretty good shape, so I was confident I could handle myself. Unbeknownst to me, the rip tide was especially strong that day, and I had gone out without a float.

Nothing will make you feel more helpless than being sucked out to sea. The harder I tried to get back to the beach, the farther out I went. I soon became fatigued and out of breath, which made the regular arrival of waves over the back of my head all the more troubling. If my buddies hadn't been boogie-boarding nearby, I'm sure I would have drowned. It's the only time I can remember calling out for help and really meaning it. It gives me chills just to think about it.

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Dr. Proxy

Once, I went through a phase of drinking bleach
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Seriously, I have never had a near death experience, but Ive encountered many "Near internal injury" because, an old friend of mine had a huge back garden, anout three acres, he had a huge shed, which we used to do stunts on, we even made our own wrestling ring, and out own Barbed wire bat (Thats right, we went out with pliars and cut some barbed wire off a fence), we had steel chairs (Stolen from a local football club[dumbasses left the door open])we had a ladder, and we made our own tables.

Any way, to cut a long story short, the shed is like 15ft high, and we decided to push me off it (Just like taker did to mankind '98 HIAC) into a table, which was poorly constructed, you can imagine the pain I was in...so we just decided to fall off the 10ft ladder infuture.

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PeaceSells

The best I've got is nearly losing an eye 3 times.

First time wasn't too bad, I got hit in the eye by a stone and was rushed to A&E and they told me much harder and I'd have lost my eye basically. It just turned into an awful black eye basically though.

Second time, I fell off my bike and into a row of steel railings with like spear-head style tops. That's the best I can explain them, so I fell into one of those eye first basically. It poked me just below the eye, with a lot of blood everywhere, I again went to A&E and was told any higher and I'd be blind.

Third time, we were playing a game called Hunts. Not sure if it's just a Northern Irish thing, or if everyone plays that, but I was being chased, and ran into some barbed wire basically, again head first. It cut me the whole way down from my forehead to my mouth, just beside my eye. Another trip to the A&E, and it was basically my closest call with losing my eye. I still have a scar across my face from that time.

That's the best I can come up with, can't think of any life-threatening times.

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Dr. Proxy

Ouch.
So im guessing your eyes are fucked now then.

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