ATM Etiquette

pp2

Heh, this is pretty much spot-on:


A sign in the Credit Union Lobby reads: Please note that this
credit union is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling members
to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Members using this
new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when
accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE
procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your
gender.

MALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align
car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger
seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back
and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine
due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN
written on the inside of the back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and reenter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place
cash inside.
17. Write deposit amount in check register and place
receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Recheck makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place
card into the slot provided.
23. Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to
irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.

Danny Diamond

Founder/Admin

Hahaha. I have seen it b4 but still funny.

Bouchie

I thought this was going to be "people should stay well enough away from the person using the ATM" post.

Personally, I like to get within an inch of the person at the machine and pretend my ___ is a gun sticking in their leg.

pp2

Edit: cause yeah, I just actually read what Bouch posted and basically repeated the obvious.

Nothing to see here, move along...

Jackie Pies

hahahah, women and stoners, i swear, always driving w/ the break on.

Mr. Kennedy

That's pretty funny pp2, where did you get that from?

Visit and shop for video games at my Amazon-based store, also get discounted HD DVDs while they last.

pp2

I get many of these every day lol. Some of my family members like to do the mass-mailing of jokes. This particular one is courtesy of my mom and the 80 or so other people she sent it to.