Calling a grieving friend.

Inogenius · 10-21-2009, 08:48 PM

A friend of mine was killed in Afghanistan yesterday due to a road side bomb. His tour with the Marines was scheduled to end November 29th. The family is obviously devastated. I'm also very good friends with his brother. Another friend and I were talking today, and we're just confused on when we should call; what we should even say when we call.

At which point would you recommend doing it? We don't want to be a detriment, having them just repeat what they've already told everyone else. Waiting until the funeral seems very heartless, but this also seems like a time when the family needs to be together mourning.

KenTheKiller · 10-21-2009, 09:16 PM

I don't know.. it's a hard thing. A friend of mine's fiance died on New Years and.. I don't know. I just couldn't say anything to him. I said I was sorry and was there for him but that's about all I could do.

Zar · 10-21-2009, 10:30 PM

Sorry to hear sir. Honestly, I think just going to see him in person, say you're sorry and just hang out. Even if it is in silence.

Unless you know him as a guy that likes to deal with things alone or just with family, then give him a call, condolences and you will be there when he needs you.

Inogenius · 10-22-2009, 12:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zar
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Sorry to hear sir. Honestly, I think just going to see him in person, say you're sorry and just hang out. Even if it is in silence.

Unless you know him as a guy that likes to deal with things alone or just with family, then give him a call, condolences and you will be there when he needs you.

Yeah, I think that's what I'm going to do. They're flying to Maryland right now to go through the process of identifying and claiming the body. Once they get back, I'll definitely be stopping by.

You know, this war has been going on for 8 years. It wasn't until yesterday that it finally became real to me.

Brandon · 10-22-2009, 12:51 AM

I think that's the thing to do. Let them handle what has to be done and then stop by their house and talk to them in person. I wouldn't want to call.. it's something that should probably be done in person.

Sorry to hear about that though.. definitely.

Beaker · 10-22-2009, 07:00 AM

I'd stop by personally and offer any help I could. My condolences to you on losing a friend though. That's beyond tragic

The Pope · 10-22-2009, 01:19 PM

I normally think of giving it a week and then ask them how their doing and hope they'll be okay.

You can't really say much, eventually they will be okay.

Freak · 10-22-2009, 02:37 PM

When my friend's girlfriend died, I just told him briefly, "If you need to talk, let me know."

Beaker · 10-22-2009, 04:54 PM

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Originally Posted by Freak
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When my friend's girlfriend died, I just told him briefly, "If you need to talk, let me know."

That's all it takes. Just letting them know your their for them if needed is good enough. You definitely don't want to push it however.

Daddy · 10-23-2009, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Inogenius
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You know, this war has been going on for 8 years. It wasn't until yesterday that it finally became real to me.

Funny how that works out cause it is that way for a lot of people.

I won't say anymore than is already said, because people hit it right on the head.

Calling a grieving friend.

This is a discussion on Calling a grieving friend. within the General Discussion forums, part of the Non Wrestling Forums category; A friend of mine was killed in Afghanistan yesterday due to a road side bomb. His tour with the Marines ...