funny sex acts

Originally Posted by Freak

No, I never much liked you either.

Originally Posted by Tyler Durden

Quit repping me and sending me lyrics to your songs then.

Like I can't work out the true meaning of "Bend me over backwards my English master". I've got my eyes on you.

Originally Posted by molebeing

omg it has been a while since I seen your pretty face. I would do anything sexual with you.

Originally Posted by Tyler Durden

Quite the opposite to my good friend Meatloaf.

He said "He'd do anything for love but he......"

Oh you get the picture

Originally Posted by molebeing

No I don't. Explain it slowly and in a sexy voice.

Originally Posted by Tyler Durden

I'm old.

Everything I do is slow.

My voice is somewhere between Betty Boop and Barry White

Originally Posted by molebeing

lol time for a retirement home.

Originally Posted by Necro

Rolodex of Love

The Rolodex of Love
The following sexual acts and descriptions are part of a fad that has run through the internet, that of coming up with the most terms for whatever extreme things you could do in bed with your partner. Most of them were born with the 21st century but some are decades old. They are generally crude, rude, and nasty to women; if you find them that way, don't do them. Thank you.

Cold Lunch
The act of vomiting directly onto some chick's head while she's performing fellatio


Daisy Chain
Partner (A) is sucking off or eating out partner (B) who is sucking off or eating out partner (C) and so on until the final person is sucking off or eating out partner (A). Partners can be gay, lesbian or straight.


Dirty Sanchez
A time honored event in which while laying the bone doggie style, you insert your finger into her asshole. You then pull it out and wipe it across her upper lip leaving a thin shit mustache. This makes her look like someone whose name is Dirty Sanchez

Gobstopper
With two hands, spread your tramp's anus open, then spit a big-ass loogie down the asshole then close it back up. You can give her a smack on the ass when you're done, if you want.

Hershey Highway
When plugging your girl in the ass, you run into some hot diarrhea. Don't hurt her feelings by getting grossed out though, just pretend it's extra lube.

Hot Lunch
The result of defecating a tube of shit directly into a girl's mouth.

The Hunter Gatherer
You and your partner defecate while 69ing. Pretty much self-explanatory.

The Juanita Special Bean Dip
While your tramp rides you like a mechanical bull, insert your thumb into her poop chute (be sure to get your thumb nice and gooey), then stick your brown thumb into her mouth, and slip it under her tongue so she can get the full robust taste of the Juanita "special" bean dip.


Monroe Transfer
When you and your partner connect each other's assholes with a tube. One defecates through the tube, thus transferring the turds to the rectum of the other.

New York Style Taco
Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go down, you barf on her box. Happy trails.

Peanut Butter And Jelly Sandwich
Shit on a woman's snatch during menstruation. Proceed to munch. Mmmm Mmmm Nasty! (Crunchy or smooth...depending on what you've been eating.)

The Pirate's Treasure
While fucking your girl in the ass, you strike a hefty load of shit. After you've found this buried treasure deep in her booty, you scream, "Argh!", like a pirate.