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July 12th 2008 Live from the PWN Arena in Hartford, Connecticut!
PRESHOW MATCHES:
-L.A.W.-, Shawn Wilson, and The Great Shan0 defeated John, Shane McMichaels, seXus, and Teh Tedd0rz
Emperor Paulz0 McSexersmithson defeated CM Shitbag
Erin Edwards defeated Erica, Nicole Scorpion, and Angela Stone
Stu “The Snake” St. Clair defeated Nick Malone
Fireworks explode as “Ready To Fall” by Rise Against begins to play. The PWN Arena is packed with well over a thousand fans on their feet holding up signs and enjoying themselves already. The scene cuts to backstage quickly with everyone seemingly in a hectic worry. The bully from England, Dmac is shown walking in the opposite direction than the medics and backstage staff. The camera man decides to follow the medics which leads to Shawn Wilson on the ground with blood pouring from his face. A medic is heard screaming that something is wrong with his eye. With that, we cut to the ring for a number one contenders match. MATCH: Shaun Quinn vs. Mark Fraser (Number 1 Contendership)
Shaun Quinn vs Mark Fraser : M. Fraser walks into a high dropkick from Shaun Quinn. Shaun Quinn strikes M. Fraser. Shaun Quinn hits a rolling kick on M. Fraser. S. Quinn hits a dropkick on Mark Fraser. Mark Fraser reverses a hip toss. M. Fraser hits a dropkick on Shaun Quinn. Flying reverse elbow by Mark Fraser. Cover for a two count. S. Quinn counters an avalanche with a raised foot to the face. Super frankensteiner on M. Fraser, who hit hard. Cover for a two count. Vicious kick to the teeth from Shaun Quinn. Akira Maeda would be proud. Hooks the leg for a close fall. Mark Fraser reverses a hip toss. M. Fraser hits a wicked chop that echoes through the building. S. Quinn pushes out of a Mark Fraser hold. S. Quinn hits a dropkick on Mark Fraser. The two competitors end up in the corner, grappling. The referee tries to break them up, but S. Quinn pushes him away. The ref tries again, and this time M. Fraser is the one to shove the referee away...and that prompts a double DQ decision from the referee! The fight has started up again! Shaun Quinn attacks M. Fraser, and they brawl all around ringside, then into the crowd! They eventually disappear backstage, still fighting. I'll give this a ***1\4 rating.
Winner: Draw
ROAD AGENT REVIEW:
Match Quality: 90%
Crowd Reaction: 61%
Overall Rating: 75%
No Other Notes
MATCH: Cowboys From Hell vs. Pimpin' Porno
Cowboys From Hell vs Pimpin' Porno : Tom Red slams Holden McGroin. Running knee lift from Tommy Red. There's a two count on the pin. Tom Red tags out to Ken the Killer. Cowboys From Hell whip McGroin into the ropes and hit a double clothesline. Hooks the leg for a two count. KTK slams Holden McGroin down. Holden McGroin pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Spear by Holden McGroin. Hooks the leg for a two count. Tag between Holden McGroin and Seanneth McAssSmacky. KTK takes a quick lariat. Pin, but KTK is out just before the three count. Big dropkick by Seanneth McAssSmacky, who got good elevation. Ken the Killer fights out of a grapple. Ken the Killer snap suplexes SMS...with authority! ('With authority', trademark G.Monsoon 1986.) Tag to Tommy Red. SMS takes a headbutt from Tommy Red. Tag to Holden McGroin. Running knee lift from Tommy Red. Cowboys From Hell have Holden McGroin to themselves. Tiger Bomb (Ken) Backbreaker! 1....2....3! It's over. Cowboys From Hell climb opposite turnbuckles, working the crowd as they celebrate their victory. A good *** rating.
Winners: Cowboys From Hell
ROAD AGENT REVIEW:
Match Quality: 77%
Crowd Reaction: 77%
Overall Rating: 76%
Other Notes:
Ken the Killer is losing overness because of his weak gimmick. ---COMMERCIAL BREAL---
MATCH: Chi Town's Finest vs. Stone Cold Killas
Chi-Town's Finest vs Stone Cold Killas : R. Stone walks into a high dropkick from Jason Danielson. Legsweep out of Nowhere. Where is Nowhere, and why do moves keep coming out of there? Does it have a factory? DDT from the top rope by Jason Danielson. That looked brutal. Tag between Rob Stone and Jay Stone. Jason Dani walks into a high dropkick from Jay Stone. J. Stone drops an elbow...but misses. Fate can be so cruel. Jason Danielson scores with a back heel kick on J. Stone. Jason Dani tags out to Jaylon Danielson. Jason Danielson scoops up J. Stone. Jaylon Dan bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Flying reverse elbow by Jaylon Danielson. J. Stone walks into a face crusher variation. Tag between Jaylon Danielson and Jason Danielson. Jay Stone is in big trouble...Double Darkness Falls!! 1....2....3! Chi-Town's Finest remain in the ring, celebrating their victory. **1\2 rating for a decent contest.
Winners: Chi Town's Finest
ROAD AGENT REVIEW:
Match Quality: 73%
Crowd Reaction: 61%
Overall Rating: 67%
No Other Notes
Shaun Quinn is walking backstage when Mark Fraser comes from behind and attacks him with a chair. Mark Fraser walks off after hitting a few more chair shots, leaving S. Quinn down on the floor.
MATCH: Mike Roberts vs. Kizzy McAwesome
Kizzy McAwesome vs Mike Roberts : Spinebuster by Mike Roberts, executed with Arn-esque perfection. Kizzy walks into a face-first flapjack. Flying spear out of the corner! Kizzy nearly got snapped in two. Cover, but there's a last second kick-out. Flying shoulder tackle by Mike Rober sends Kizzy to the mat. Hooks the leg for a two count. Mike Rober walks into a trip. Flying shoulder tackle by Kizzy sends Mike Rober to the mat. Mike Rober walks into a spike slam. Mike Roberts fights out of a grapple. Powerful Spear by Mike Roberts. Kizzy McAwesome can barely stand. Here it comes - Sitout Spinebuster. 1....2...3, it's finished. Kizzy McAwesome leaves and walks back down the aisle. Wait...Mike Roberts comes running as well, and Kizzy gets dropped with a clothesline, followed by a load of stomps. He is left lying in the aisle. I'm knocking off half a star for some blown spots, so that's a ***1\2 rating.
Winner: Mike Roberts
ROAD AGENT NOTES:
Match Quality: 91%
Crowd Reaction: 61%
Overall Rating: 76%
No Other Notes
---COMMERCIAL BREAK---
MATCH: Natasha Silver vs. Ms. Patricia Webber
Ms. Patricia Webber vs Natasha Silver : Super frankensteiner on Natasha Si, who hit hard. Vicious kick to the teeth from Ms. Patricia Webber. Diamond Dust from Ms. Patricia Webber, Natasha Si is out. Pin, but Natasha Si is out just before the three count. Ms. Webber hits a dropkick on Natasha Silver. Hooks the leg for a two count. Natasha Si ducks a wild right hand. Second rope flying axe handle, Ms. Webber goes down. Flying cross body off the top rope! I'll give a 0.8 on the Steamboat scale for that effort. Ms. Patricia Webber reverses a hip toss. Natasha Si takes a hurrancarana from Ms. Patricia Webber. Natasha Silver hooks up a suplex, but Ms. Webber flips out and lands on her feet, and quickly grabs the tights to score with a school boy pin! 1...2..3! The referee somehow missed the blatant cheating! Ms. Patricia Webber climbs each turnbuckle in turn, working the crowd as she celebrates her victory *** rating, as it was good, but nothing too special.
Winner: Ms. Patricia Webber
ROAD AGENT NOTES:
Match Quality: 84%
Crowd Reaction: 55%
Overall Rating: 69%
No Other Notes
MATCH: Gabriella vs. Samantha McSexy
Gabriella vs Samantha McSexy : Sexy Sam takes a back suplex. Samantha McSexy takes a butterfly suplex from Gabs. Cover for a two count. Samantha McSexy takes the advantage after a i-block-your-punch-you-don't-block-mine routine. Sexy Sam uses a basement dropkick to the knee. Samantha McSexy strikes Gabs. Legsweep out of Nowhere. Where is Nowhere, and why do moves keep coming out of there? Does it have a factory? Gabs blocks a kick from Samantha McSexy. Brainbuster suplex by Gabriella, who apparently is in the mood to bust some brains. Gabriella moves in for the kill. OWNED! 1....2....3. Gabriella climbs each turnbuckle in turn, working the crowd as she celebrates her victory A good *** rating.
Winner: Gabriella
ROAD AGENT NOTES:
Match Quality: 77%
Crowd Reaction: 72%
Overall Rating: 74%
---COMMERCIAL BREAK---
Nordstr and NKA are walking backstage when they run into Cowboys From Hell. The two teams stare each other down, and threats are made, then they walk away from each other, looking angry. MATCH: International Champion Mark McSexersmithson vs. Ramone Montana
Mark McSexersmithson vs Ramone Montana (For The PWN International Title) : Ramone Mon gets caught with a belly to belly suplex from Mark MS. Mark McSexersmithson snap suplexes Ramone Mon. Ramone Mon gets caught with a short powerbomb from Mark MS. Ramone Mon gets caught with a short powerbomb from Mark MS. Mark McSexersmithson gets taken down out of nowhere. Rude Awakening on Mark McSexersmithson by Ramone Mon. Driven full nelson slam on Mark MS. Cover for a two count. Mark MS counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Gutwrench into a stomach breaker, Ramone Mon may be winded. Hooks the leg for a two count. Delayed brainbuster suplex, Mark MS really drove that one down. Cover, but there's a last second kick-out. Ramone Mon kicks Mark McSexersmithson in the gut to reverse the momentum. Mark MS takes a headbutt from Ramone Montana. Mark MS counters an avalanche with a raised foot to the face. Vertical suplex by Mark McSexersmithson. Ramone Montana can barely stand. Sexy Time! 1....2....3. Mark McSexersmithson offers a handshake to Ramone Mon...but he spits at Mark McSexersmithson and walks off! This was missing something, so it only gets a ****1\2 rating.
Winner (and STILL champion): Mark McSexersmithson
ROAD AGENT NOTES:
Match Quality: 94%
Crowd Reaction: 94%
Overall Rating: 93%
No Other Notes
Angela Stone is walking backstage, when she meets Gabriella. They trade insults, get in each others faces, but eventually walk off without coming to blows.
---COMMERCIAL BREAK---
MATCH: Jason Roche and Dale Carpenter vs. Dmac and Mike
Jason Roche and Dale Carpenter vs Mike and Dmac : Dale takes a back suplex. Hard impact russian legsweep by Mike. If you're going to get impact, 'hard' is probably a good way to go. There's a two count on the pin. Tag between Mike and Dmac. Mike \ Dmac whip Dale into the corner. Mike whips Dmac in for a hard clothesline to follow-up. Hooks the leg for a two count. Driven DDT by Dmac. The ring shook violently, instantly making it better at selling than some of the current roster. Dale Carpenter avoids a Dmac avalanche. Super kick by Dale Carpenter. There's a two count on the pin. Tag to Jason Roche. Jason Roch crushes Dmac with a sweet running senton. Pin, but Dmac is out just before the three count. Jason Roch hits a dropkick on Dmac. Jason Roch only gets knees on a splash. Flying elbow from Dmac. Dmac tags out to Mike. Mike snap suplexes Jason Roch. Tag between Jason Roche and Dale Carpenter. Gut buster, Dale hits hard. Dale scores with a forearm, sending Mike down into the corner. The referee pulls Dale Carpenter away to get the break. Wait! Mike has pulled something out of his tights. Dale Carpenter walks over...and gets floored by a punch! 1....2....3! The referee never saw the brass knuckles! Mike \ Dmac remain in the ring, celebrating their victory. I'll give this a ***1\4 rating.
Winners: Mike and Dmac
ROAD AGENT NOTES:
Match Quality: 83%
Crowd Reaction: 80%
Overall Rating: 81%
Other Notes:
Dmac is losing overness because of his weak gimmick
After the match ends Mike and Dmac celebrate while awaiting their fallen victims to stand. They eventually do and Mike nods at Dmac, who walks over and floors both men with a clothesline. Mike smirks arrogantly and grabs a mic. He reveals that general manager Ken Howlett, who is out on business, told him that at the first ever large event, Summer Slaughter I, Mike will go one on on ewith Dale Carpenter for the Heavyweight Championship. Dale and Mike raise their arms in the ring as the show comes to an end. 
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