Natural Approach 2

- Really dug the opening segment. Both Ziggler and Punk come out looking really important, which is key for both guys at this point.
- And on that note, I dug the main event a ton. Orton/Barrett continues, and I trust you won't over-saturate it like the WWE has done.
- The matches were all written well, but some I probably would have fast-forwarded through if watching on Youtube. Not much love from me for Ryan, Hennig Jr, or Otunga. I'm a giant fan of Yoshi Tatsu though, so I probably would have watched that match twice
- One of my favorite parts through all of this was Michael Cole. You managed to make him ridiculous without becoming "change the channel" annoying. Almost like writing Bobby Heenan, but, well, nobody can touch Bobby Heenan. Still something that managed to tie the show together from start to finish. Very good show.

Brodus Clay should get you Natty, beam down to Planet Funk already

Just read the show through, and really enjoyed it, especially the little smarky comments that you throw into your writing, it truly does make me laugh. The promo work was solid, you've always had a talent for that going back to your TNA thread. I'd say the storyline that intrigues me the most at the moment is Beth Phoenix and her withdrawal from the Divas division, and to be fair, that's saying something if you can create a buzz around that division.

I guess the only real problem with the show was a lack of star power (not your problem though really), Ziggler is making that transition to main eventer, so really Punk was your only top dog on the show (unless I'm mistaken, I couldn't see Cena on the show). Still you got away with it, but I can see why you'd wouldn't rule out Smackdown guys coming over to Raw at this stage.

Keep up the good work Natty.

Originally Posted by Big Papa

I'm going to have to give it a second read-through later but on first read... Everything I expected and more. Two Big Papa thumbs up.

Big Papa thumbs up are wayyyy better than normal thumbs up, so I am truly honored.

Originally Posted by Exponent

- Really dug the opening segment. Both Ziggler and Punk come out looking really important, which is key for both guys at this point.
- And on that note, I dug the main event a ton. Orton/Barrett continues, and I trust you won't over-saturate it like the WWE has done.
- The matches were all written well, but some I probably would have fast-forwarded through if watching on Youtube. Not much love from me for Ryan, Hennig Jr, or Otunga. I'm a giant fan of Yoshi Tatsu though, so I probably would have watched that match twice
- One of my favorite parts through all of this was Michael Cole. You managed to make him ridiculous without becoming "change the channel" annoying. Almost like writing Bobby Heenan, but, well, nobody can touch Bobby Heenan. Still something that managed to tie the show together from start to finish. Very good show.

Dolph Ziggler made the transition to my favorite wrestler at some point this year, which is interesting, so I'm going to try to do him justice but he's so much better at Ziggler than I am.

Thank you for digging the main event. I liked it too. Personally, I am of the opinion that on any given night any one can lose, so I rarely consider a loss to be a BURIAL like some. I think it was important for Ziggler to take the pinfall tonight, especially after his Royal Rumble win. He's not superman. He's not invincible. He's exactly what the main event scene needs more of.

Be careful with fast-forwarding through matches - there's an unexpected gem waiting in every Ezekiel Jackson vs. Great Khali. Well, maybe not... but a Hunico/DiBiase match I would have normally skipped through gave me a new perspective on Hunico and now I'm a fan of his. You never know! I have a sometimes controversial view when it comes to pro wrestling and characters/wrestlers. Ken disagrees with me, I think. He's of the mindset that you should only hire someone when you know what you are going to do with them. I disagree. I say hire whoever you want, and then use them to their strengths. If you're doing it right, the pieces fall into place naturally and make for a cohesive whole.

Lulz Michael Troll. Love that guy. He's way more fun than he should be. In the "BTB" I did for WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2010 on Xbox 360, I had Jerry Lawler revert to his attitude era ways - it just felt right. Here, I'm going to let Lawler stay boring and old. It's Cole's time to shine.

Originally Posted by Ed

Brodus Clay should get you Natty, beam down to Planet Funk already

Just read the show through, and really enjoyed it, especially the little smarky comments that you throw into your writing, it truly does make me laugh. The promo work was solid, you've always had a talent for that going back to your TNA thread. I'd say the storyline that intrigues me the most at the moment is Beth Phoenix and her withdrawal from the Divas division, and to be fair, that's saying something if you can create a buzz around that division.

I guess the only real problem with the show was a lack of star power (not your problem though really), Ziggler is making that transition to main eventer, so really Punk was your only top dog on the show (unless I'm mistaken, I couldn't see Cena on the show). Still you got away with it, but I can see why you'd wouldn't rule out Smackdown guys coming over to Raw at this stage.

Keep up the good work Natty.

1. Get the Funk out.

2. Smarky comments are here to stay. They are "my voice" amid all the madness and I'm glad you enjoy them.

3. Lack of star power isn't just a problem with my show, it's a problem with the WWE, unfortunately. I think I made good use of Punk, Ziggler, Foley and Orton for the show. The Ryder/Eve/Cena stuff was kept to a minimum to give people a ****ing break but rest assured it will play out.

4. Thank you sir.

Initially, I wasn't thrilled with the card, but I'm not supposed to be. I still have to mold this universe to the way I like it and that will be a transition fur sure.

Raw Review (As reading)

The opening debate between Ziggler and Punk was great and Ziggles rightly pointed out that he is going to WM where as Punk isnt yet, Ziggler to wipe the gold from Punks shoulder please. Punk is a great champion but now is a great time for the title to change hands and a new star to be made

Glad Tatsu got the victory the guy is very underutilized and Slater is just a bore

Ryan picking up the win gives him some more momentum but hopefully not enough to get him anywhere, cant stand the guy as a singles competitor even though hes billed from the place im born and live

Slater and Gabriel as a tag team is not something I want to see again, one is obviously much better and I dont want to see Slater dragged down by Gabriel, sorry Gabriel dragged down by Slater haha

Otunga would try to steal the spotlight but Foley saves the day to the delight of the fans. Makes sense that Foley would steal the spotlight himself and wonder what his future holds

Glad Clay got the victory and the upper hand in the post match attack, The Funk is aweome just roll with it

Coles fart comment was hilarious

Jericho trolling was awesome, out of a limo into another, cant wait to see your reasoning behind his return

Kofi wasnt really going to win with it being a basic 3 on 1 and it showed, Bourne costs his partner from the outset

Woah Kane really destroyed Eve and it was a bit sickening to read but adds to the story nonetheless. Cena is embracing the hate, let him release it

Glad Orton got drafted in but Ziggler taking the fall is a bit odd maybe Barrett should have took the fall or even Ziggler pinning Orton to make Ziggler look stronger

Very good show overall and ticked the boxes for factoring in storylines all over the card from main event to lower card to the divas division even

Cant wait for more

Definitely seems like you're having fun and that's always something that makes me enjoy reading! Adding little things that are hilarious kinda shows that, stuff like Cena walking away "all angry-like", "it doesn't look as cool as Slater thinks" and "lol I'm a snake". The Kane & Eve segment was just great and hilarious! Also you somehow made Michael Cole pretty awesome throughout the night. Although this obviously isn't simply a comedy project it's really great stuff all around!

I'm not liking the Brodus hate but if it helps get Hawkins & Reks over and they end up murdering him then I'm completely fine with it! I'm extremely happy that someone is actually booking these guys! Otunga was perfect in his role tonight as well, too awesome to get buried but not awesome enough to win anything so it's good. Foley as GM for the night is great! I hope he finds some way to keep up his role! I don't know how you write Laurinatis yet though, hopefully you don't make him too exciting....

Ryder getting screwed out of a main event tag match? That feels familiar... only this time he was left able to wrestle but didn't! Could Eve be secretly trying to play Yoko Ono by getting herself hurt? >.>
This whole Beth Phoenix stuff has me really intrigued... I guess it's either a way to kill the Divas division or make it actually interesting! So far it's kinda doing the first. Speaking of women... Vickie taking Mr. Socko was awesome! Orton made for a good partner and it helped further the Orton / Barrett hate! I also have to wonder if Kofi will find himself a new partner to take on Primo & Epico? And will Gabriel join Slater? I wonder if you could make that any good...

Chris Jericho, the Ayatollah of being a troll-a was the highlight of the night. Just awesome.

Friday, February 3rd, 2012

Cody Rhodes: “Welcome, everyone, to Friday Night Smackdown!”

Rhodes is standing in the center of the ring with the classic Intercontinental Championship belt over his shoulder and a microphone in his hand when WWE Friday Night Smackdown begins. A few people are booing Cody, but not many.

Cody Rhodes: “On tonight's edition of Smackdown we're going to see Booker T competing in... a flaming tables match!”

Cody slowly turns to face Booker at the commentary desk. Book doesn't seem to know what Cody is talking about.

Booker T: “What.”

Cody Rhodes: “We all know the pop you got during the Rumble on Sunday wasn't enough. You've said you wrestle because the fans want to see you wrestle, Booker. I bet if you got in this ring with me right now and asked them all if they want to see you in a flaming tables match tonight you'd get a resounding YES. You know why?”

Booker waits for Cody to finish.

Cody Rhodes: “Because these people don't give a damn about your well-being. They don't care about you. They never have. So stop wasting your time thinking about them and start thinking about you. Do yourself a favor, Booker: retire... while it's still your choice.”

The crowd starts to boo loudly.

Cody Rhodes: “Hopefully it's not too late, Book. Hopefully they can remember you for the days when you actually deserved respect, instead of the nostalgiac punching bag you've been reduced to.”

Booker's upset but remains silent to avoid exacerbating things.

Cody Rhodes: “That's what I thought.”

More boos for Rhodes.

Cody Rhodes: “So why are you challenging me to a title defense when you and I both know you don't deserve this.”

Cody uses his spare hand to lift the classic Intercontinental title into the air. He looks real angry. He stares down Booker for a few moments. Cody places the belt back over his shoulder as a ringside official hands Booker T a microphone. The five time WCW Champion looks puzzled.

Booker T: “I don't know wh-”

Cody Rhodes: “Don't play the oblivious fool, Booker! It's a very natural look for you but I'm not buying it. Not anymore.”

Booker T: “I don't know what you're talkin about, Cody.”

Cody Rhodes: “I wasn't scheduled to start Smackdown by exposing the shortcomings of a wrestler well beyond his prime but why wait for later, Booker. You want to challenge me? You want to be back in the spotlight?!”

Cody looks at his championship belt. He stares deeply at it.

Cody Rhodes: “Fine... Then I accept. But I pick the time. And I pick right now.”

Booker T: “What are you talkin' about 'challenging?'...”

Michael Cole: “Yeah, Cody. If anyone's challenged around here, it's Booker!”

Cole starts to laugh before quickly stopping himself.

Michael Cole: “Let me save everybody some time and say I am sorry for my insensitive words to anyone who may have been offended. When I made those comments-”

Booker T: (into headset, away from microphone, never taking his eyes off Cody) “Shut up, Cole.”

Rhodes snaps out of it, looking away from the classic Intercontinental title and locking eyes with Booker T. He's smiling... almost laughing.

Cody Rhodes: “Booker, why would the agents tell me I have a title match against you if-”

The colored house lights come on suddenly and the crowd turns bright gold. Cody whips around to face the entrance as the screen format goes letterbox. Booker T fills the shucky ducky quota and seems genuinely surprised by this turn of events. Goldust appears on stage, standing in a golden glow with a microphone in hand.

Cody Rhodes: “No.”

Goldust brings the microphone up to his mouth.

Cody Rhodes: “You turn around and you walk away now.”

Goldust: “I'm afraid I can't do that, Cody.”

Cody Rhodes: “You actually think you can take this title away from me?”

Goldust: “I held that title proudly more than a decade before you put on your first pair of wrestling boots, boy. I'm not here to take anything from ya... I'm here to give ya the beating of your life.”

The crowd pops.

Booker T: (to Cole and Matthews) “Tell me he did not just say dat!”

Josh Matthews almost gets a word in but Cody cuts him off.

Cody Rhodes: “Yeah ok. Let me guess: Dad doesn't approve of my approach to being Intercontinental Champion, right? And you wanted to come out here and put me in my place to show him you aren't incompetent. That about right? Or are we going to pretend he isn't the only reason you ever manage to nut up in life.”

Goldust doesn't respond.

Cody Rhodes: “You being out here is a mistake, Dustin. And it's not like the other mistakes you've made where you end up in court. I will put you in the hospital and I will do it with a smile on my face. You come out here, you step into my ring, and I will tear you apart. I did not become the Intercontinental Champion to wrestle a string of novelty matches. You and Booker T should be nothing more than downloadable content in a video game.”

The crowd boos.

Goldust: “What happened, Cody? Legacy don't matter to you any more? What kind of champion disrespects-”

Cody Rhodes: “You've got it backwards. I am the Intercontinental Champion. I deserve respect. Not dad. Not Booker. Not you.”

Goldust: “Clearly you learned a different definition of the word 'respect' growing up than I did. Maybe that's dad's fault, maybe it's not. I don't know. But it sounds like you need a little reeducation.“

The crowd gives Goldust their support and Cody Rhodes looks annoyed. He does an interpretation of a Goldust taunt, mocking his half-brother.

Cody Rhodes: “You teach me about respect? If you had had any respect for yourself, you might still have a career. Instead you're a washed up circus clown. Face paint? Check. Stupid wig? Check. You may have traded the polka dots in for black and gold but underneath it all you're still just a living, breathing joke begging for validation. And spoiler alert, Dustin: you won't get it from me.”

Goldust looks out toward the crowd and they begin to rally behind him. He studies their reaction for a few moments. It's only growing louder. Goldust looks back at Rhodes.

Goldust: “I'll see you later, Cody.”

Fans chant Goldust's name as he heads back through the curtains. Cody stares at Booker T intensely for a moment before turning and walking backstage. Commentary reminds us that we are set to hear from Beth Phoenix in just a short while, but right now it's time for the opening match.

JUSTIN GABRIEL vs. PRIMO

Fun match with a lot of aerial manuevers. Justin Gabriel makes a concerted effort to keep his eyes on Epico at ringside, which appears to give Epico the advantage at times. Gabriel manages to take control after a lot of back-and-forth, setting Primo up for the 450 Splash as we approach the finish. Thinking ahead, Gabriel knocks Epico back with a baseball slide before climbing up to the top rope. He hits the 450 Splash! The referee counts 1...2... and Rosa manages to get Primo's foot on the bottom rope. The ref suspects foul play and argues with Rosa Mendes. Behind his back, Epico blasts Gabriel with the Backcracker and drags a hurt Primo over him. The referee turns around just as Epico has left the ring. 1, 2, 3.

Primo wins via pinfall.

Commentary puts over Epico and Primo's innate ability to elude disqualification. The cousins work like clockwork in and out of the ring, continually proving their title win over Air Boom was no fluke. Rosa and Epico celebrate with Primo as we take a commercial break.

# COMMERCIAL BREAK #

We return from the break and it is time to hear from Beth Phoenix. She makes her way out to the ring with a bag over her shoulder and everyone's curious to hear what she has to say. There's a little bit of booing here and there, but when it looks like Beth is about to speak, everyone shuts up.

Beth Phoenix: “You know that weird social phenomenon where people will say cruel things about a celebrity until that celebrity dies, then all of a sudden people care and they have the nicest things to say? Well this week that celebrity was the WWE Divas division. It was on life support for a very, very long time, and as champion, it was my decision to pull the plug.”

The crowd reaction is mixed.

Beth Phoenix: “But this isn't a eulogy. Because we are not here to mourn the death of the Divas division. No...”

Phoenix reaches down and grabs the bag she brought with her to the ring. She unzips it and holds up the WWE Women's Championship belt.

Beth Phoenix: “...we are here to celebrate a resurrection.”

Beth puts the Women's Championship over her shoulder.

Beth Phoenix: “No more 'just because' battle royales or random eight-woman tags. No more stupid butterfly belt. It's no secret that the boys don't think too highly of the Divas. That's why it's time for a change. Because we are not divas, we are WRESTLERS.”

Beth casually glances toward the curtains and thinks for a moment.

Beth Phoenix: “I want only the toughest females. The Women's Division will be the strongest it's ever been. If there's a wrestler out there who deserves to challenge me for this belt, I'll fly them out myself. You want to be one of us? No contract signing, no interview – you come down to this ring and you prove you can hang.”

Beth looks into the WWE cameras.

Beth Phoenix: “First chapter begins next week.”

Beth's music hits and she leaves the ring with the WWE Women's Championship belt. Michael Cole is speechless. Everyone savor this moment. Good? Good. It's time for our next match.

JINDER MAHAL vs. BIG SHOW

Big Show comes out very aggressive, still upset at his failure to capture the gold on Sunday. Mahal should be letting the mastodon tire himself out but he makes several fleeting attempts to out-wrestle the big man and comes up short. Mahal makes the mistake of gouging Show's eyes in desperation. Big Show responds by throwing Mahal into the corner and decimating him with a series of palms across the chest. Big Show keeps going well past the referee's warning and earns himself a disqualification. It's only when Show has tired himself out that he stops and allows a tattered Jinder Mahal to collapse onto the mat.

Jinder Mahal wins via disqualification.

Big Show leaves the ring and ignores the fans looking for a high-five. Big Show stops at the top of the stage and turns to the audience. He lifts his huge right paw and the crowd cheers.

# COMMERCIAL BREAK #

We return from the commercial break to find Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, and Vickie Guerrero entering Teddy Long's office. Teddy is in the middle of a sit-down with Drew McIntyre.

Vickie Guerrero: “Excuse me!”

Teddy Long: “Actually, Vickie, this is my office, so you can excuse yourself right out that door.”

Jack Swagger: “You don't talk to a lady like that.”

Teddy Long: “And you don't talk to a General Manager like that, playa.”

Swagger backs off.

Drew McIntyre: “We're in the middle of a meeting!”

Teddy Long: “No we're not Drew, you just barged in and wouldn't go away!” (he turns to Vickie & Co.) “What can I do for you?”

Dolph Ziggler: “I am the 2012 Royal Rumble winner!”

Teddy Long: “I'm aware.”

Dolph Ziggler: “So why am I being told there's not enough time for me to go out there tonight?”

Teddy Long: “What do you want me to do, Dolph? The show was supposed to start with a match but Cody kicked things off and now we've got a lot to catch up on-”

Vickie Guerrero: “Dolph Ziggler is going to become champion at WrestleMania and you don't have time for him?! EXCUSE ME?!”

Teddy Long: “Dolph had time to say what he needed to say on Monday and I'm sure he'll have time to go out there and say something else on the next Raw but we've got a loaded Smackdown tonight and I'm not sacrificing my show just so Dolph Ziggler can run his mouth!”

There's audible applause from the crowd. Teddy Long pauses for a moment and looks at Jack Swagger, and the United States Championship on his shoulder.

Teddy Long: “You know what I was thinking this episode of Smackdown could use, however?”

Swagger cringes somewhat, certain the answer will not favor him.

Teddy Long: “A nice US Championship defense. How does that sound, Jack?”

Jack Swagger: (sighs) “That sounds great, Teddy. Thank you.”

Teddy Long: “Good, because I know just the man to challenge you. Drew...”

Drew McIntyre: “Yes-”

Teddy Long: “...do me a favor and tell Yoshi Tatsu to come see me.”

McIntyre frowns and begrudgingly accepts the task. He storms out of Long's office. Ziggler, Swagger, and Vickie argue amongst themselves as we fade out to ringside, where commentary reminds us that it's been some time since the United States Championship and the Intercontinental Championship were defended on the same night. Our next match involves neither title, however, as it's time for Sheamus and Hunico to go one-on-one-with-manager.

HUNICO vs. SHEAMUS

The match starts with a staredown between Sheamus and Camacho, which distracts the Great White long enough for Hunico to come out of nowhere with a springboard dropkick. A laughing Camacho leaves the ring so the referee can start the match and Hunico does not let up. He keeps momentum in his favor throughout the first half of the match, showing us a relatively rare side of Sheamus that's constantly on the defensive. Hunico's confidence is giving him the boost he needs to keep his larger adversary in check but Sheamus begins to pace himself and look for a window to mount his comeback.

After an unrelenting offensive, Hunico expects the audience to give him his due, but they are shouting Sheamus' name instead. An angry Hunico makes the mistake of responding to the fans instead of focusing on the match, allowing Sheamus to counter a running manuever with a back body drop that sends Hunico out onto Camacho. Sheamus fetches his opponent and brings him back in for the pin but only gets two. Camacho adjusts his sunglasses before hopping up onto the apron to complain to the referee.

Sheamus hasn't seen Camacho on the apron yet but he's aware of what's going on. Hunico swings at Sheamus, but Sheamus ducks and lifts him over his shoulder, setting him up for a Celtic Cross. He smiles and the fan response is overwhelming. Sheamus quickly turns and blasts Camacho with the Brogue Kick, sending him flying into the guard rail. He turns around and plants Hunico with the Irish Curse (Celtic Cross). The crowd is going nuts!

Sheamus wins via pinfall.

Booker T: ”Oh my goodness! That was ridiculous!!”

Michael Cole: “The Great White Sheamus able to keep Hunico strewn across his shoulders as he delivers the Brogue Kick to Camacho, can we see a replay of that?”

They air a replay.

Booker T: “I'm telling you, right there, fave five.”

Michael Cole: “A very exclusive club, I'm sure.”

Booker T: “You ain't in it, Cole!”

Michael Cole: “That's because I'm in a league of my own, Booker.”

Booker T: “Are you serious? Are you serious right now?”

Michael Cole: “I'm undefeated at WrestleMania. I'm a multiple time Slammy winner. I'm so great, I'm on two shows. That's because I equal ratings. The American people know what they want, and they want Michael Cole.”

Josh Matthews: “Well, I hate to interrupt whatever this is but it's time for a commercial break. More fairy tales about Michael Cole when we return on Friday Night Smackdown.”

Cole is heard correcting Josh that it's factual, pertinent information as Sheamus spends some time with fans at ringside and we go to a commercial break.

# COMMERCIAL BREAK #

When we come back from commercials, Randy Orton is backstage talking to Matt Striker about the Elimination Chamber.

Matt Striker: “Randy Orton, on Sunday you were eliminated from the Royal Rumble by Wade Barrett. On Monday you got your hands on him in tag team action but it was not enough, evidenced by the fact that you had to be pulled off of your opponent by a number of ringside officials. I guess the question on everyone's mind is: where does it end?”

Randy Orton is struggling to think of an answer that sounds cool, but you could mistake him for being deep in thought.

Randy Orton: “I don't know the answer to that any more than you do, Matt. That's because this isn't like before.”

Dramatic pause.

Randy Orton: “This time last year I was going after the WWE title. Four months ago, it was the World Championship. But right now I don't care about gold, I want blood. I want Wade Bar-”

Suddenly, a steel chair smashes across Randy's back and takes the Viper down. Wade Barrett is revealed to be the swinger ( ) and he gives us one more before dropping the chair to the side. He drags Randy to his feet and sends him face first into a vending machine. Barrett grabs a broom and breaks the end off. He uses the broomhandle to stave off officials who are trying to get involved. When Orton starts crawling to his feet, we see that he's been busted open. Barrett holds the broomhandle high above his head and brings it crashing down across Orton's back. The referees make a go for it and manage to subdue Barrett, driving a wedge between he and Orton. Barrett yells, “careful what you wish for, Randy” as he gets taken away.

Commentary is concerned for the health of Randy Orton, but the show must go on. Michael Cole and Booker T spend a moment letting us know that Teddy Long will be making his official selections for the World Heavyweight Championship Elimination Chamber next week on Smackdown and has announced a special main event that will involve all six men. But right now it's time for a United States Championship defense. Yoshi Tatsu is out first, followed by Jack Swagger, followed by Vickie Guerrero holding his United States Championship belt high.

YOSHI TATSU vs. JACK SWAGGER
UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP

Swagger's size advantage plays a big part in his dominance early in the match but the quick and agile Tatsu is able to shift momentum over to his side. The crowd gets behind Tatsu as he delivers a series of audible kicks but Swagger's able to catch the last one and plant Tatsu with a t-bone suplex. Swagger gloats and the fans boo. Swagger almost loses the title to a quick roll up from Tatsu that gets the fans on their feet. A frustrated Swagger gets sloppy and misses the next clothesline as Yoshi ducks underneath before taking the champion down with a spinning heel kick. Tatsu heads to the ropes again to make it two for two but Vickie manages to trip up him up. Swagger's waiting for him in the middle of the ring and finishes him with the Gutwrench Powerbomb.

Jack Swagger wins via pinfall, retaining the US Title.

Booker T and Michael Cole argue over whether Swagger deserves the United States Championship or not. We go backstage to see Cody Rhodes stretching out before the main event. It's time for our last commercial break.

# COMMERCIAL BREAK #

When we return, we see Mark Henry leaving Teddy Long's office, presumably discussing Teddy's decision for the Elimination Chamber match. He bumps into the Big Show.

Mark Henry: “Let me guess, you about to go in there and tell Teddy Long to put you in Smackdown's Elimination Chamber, huh?”

Big Show: “What's it to you?”

Mark Henry: “It's insulting is what it is. You're the reason that little weasel is still champion.”

Big Show: “No I'm not.”

Mark Henry: “And why do I gotta share a main event with some one that hurts ladies?”

Big Show looks away, frustrated that it's being brought up again.

Mark Henry: “When Chris Brown does it, people call for the scarlet letter. But you, you get a shot at the title.”

Henry shakes his head.

Mark Henry: “That ain't right.”

Big Show: “It was an accident, Mark.”

Mark Henry: “Yeah, that's what you say.” (Henry looks Show in the eye) “Just stay away from the match, okay? When the guy that I shared a Rumble main event with loses to Jinder Mahal, it makes me look bad.”

Henry walks past Show and disappears off screen. Big Show collects his thoughts and walks up to Teddy Long's office. He reaches out to grab the door knob but doesn't open it. He hesitates for a moment before letting go and walking away. Booker and Cole speculate as to what this means and take the time to wish A.J. Lee a speedy recovery as she attends injury rehab. She is accompanied by Daniel Bryan, who could not be with us tonight but will be appearing on the program to discuss her injuries next week. And with that, it's time for our last match of the night.

# MAIN EVENT #

GOLDUST
vs.
CODY RHODES
INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP

Years of animosity between these two men come pouring out as they put it all on the line in Smackdown's main event. Cody Rhodes gets the upper hand and runs circles around Goldust with plenty of energy to spare. The old veteran, however, is not out yet, returning from an irish whip to drop to the mat and slap Cody from the floor (his back body drop reversal.) The wheels of momentum start to spin in Goldust's direction and Booker couldn't be happier for “Goldy.” Goldust isn't making any mistakes but Cody still manages to break away long enough to hit the ropes and come back with the Beautiful Disaster. Goldust kicks out at 2 and Cody is livid. Cody begins to argue with the referee. He grabs the referee by the shirt and it looks as though Cody is going to try to get himself intentionally disqualified.

Booker T sees that finish coming from a mile away and does his part to prevent it, calling Rhodes a coward and chastising him from ringside. A recovering Goldust sees that Cody's attention is divided and surprises him with a Curtain Call. Goldust makes the cover for 1...2... and a kickout from Rhodes. Both men take a few moments to get to their feet but Goldust, having had more time to recover, is in control. He sends Cody into the corner and starts laying into him with lefts and rights. Then he chops Cody across the chest and gets a Woo! from the crowd. Then another. Then another. Goldust is getting dangerously close to being disqualified just as the Big Show was earlier. He realizes this and stops to smile at the referee. He grabs each of Cody's legs and drapes them over the middle rope as the referee pleads with him not to continue. He ignores the referee and gives Cody Rhodes some Shattered Dreams.

Cody Rhodes wins via disqualification, retaining the Intercontinental Title.

The referee tries to give Cody the belt, but he's a little bit busy writhing in pain. Booker T joins Goldust in the ring and holds his arm up as though he won. The crowd cheers loudly. Booker makes a point of looking Cole in the eyes as he celebrates with “Goldy,” and Michael Cole laments. Just then, Dolph Ziggler hits the ring and blasts Booker T with the Zig Zag. Goldust turns around and starts to brawl with Ziggler but Ziggler sends him over the top rope while Booker rolls out to the floor. Having cleared the ring, Ziggler helps Rhodes to his feet. Rhodes and Ziggler stare down Booker and Goldust as the show comes to a close.

Cool Smackdown.

I'm kinda desperate to see Cody enter a little mania feud with Goldust, and I'm pretty confident that's what we're getting, but in the meantime I can enjoy your ideas for a feud. Cody's mic work was great.

Oh and Beth rebuilding the women's division is cool, that sounds like it's got more long term potential than just 'Beth faces Kharma - the end'.

Interesting to see you've not announced any matches yet for the Elimination Chamber, a different approach to the WWE where they'd announced the elimination chamber entrants in the week after the rumble - a natural approach

Originally Posted by Ed

I'm kinda desperate to see Cody enter a little mania feud with Goldust, and I'm pretty confident that's what we're getting, but in the meantime I can enjoy your ideas for a feud. Cody's mic work was great.

Oh and Beth rebuilding the women's division is cool, that sounds like it's got more long term potential than just 'Beth faces Kharma - the end'.

Interesting to see you've not announced any matches yet for the Elimination Chamber, a different approach to the WWE where they'd announced the elimination chamber entrants in the week after the rumble - a natural approach

Cody should go all Mick Foley circa September of 97 on him and do a promo featuring all of his gimmicks from the past two years. I enjoy Cody, Booker, and Goldust. This should be fun.

And yes, Beth rebuilding the Women's needs to happen. When she started the Divas of Doom thing with Natalya, I was excited. But the more she pointed out how much better she was than everyone else, the more obvious it became that she didn't really have competition to begin with. Not sure how long Beth has had this in mind, but you can be sure that with all the uncertainty going on at WWE's corporate offices, it's the right time for her to make a move like this.

As for the Elimination Chamber...

*looks at calendar, then stretches out his arms and puts his feet up on the desk*

...we've got time.

Monday, February 6th, 2012

This episode of Monday Night Raw begins with the sound of a car crash. Mick Foley comes out to a tremendous ovation and tells the live crowd he's got some announcements to make. First, he's glad to be back in whichever city they're broadcasting from tonight. (Cheap pop.) Secondly, he will be resuming his role as Commissioner while the higher-ups deliberate over who will officially take the reigns next. That's means that tonight Foley's Law will be abided again. The fans are behind Foley's every word until...

“I'm here to show the world, I'm here to show the world, c'mon... BRING IT ONNNN.” Dolph Ziggler appears on the stage, alone, with a microphone in hand. Mick Foley is all smiles but Dolph addresses him with a serious tone.

Dolph Ziggler: “Seven weeks.”

Foley cocks an eyebrow and waits for Ziggler to finish.

Dolph Ziggler: “Seven weeks until I walk out of WrestleMania as WWE Champion.”

The crowd disagrees unanimously.

Dolph Ziggler: “Seven weeks to get the WWE up to Dolph Ziggler standards.”

Mick Foley: “Just so we're clea-”

Dolph Ziggler: “No! You shut up. Your time ended long ago.”

Mick looks upset enough to respond, but hesitates, as there's an air of truth to the Rumble winner's words.

Dolph Ziggler: “And if you don't stay out of my ring, I'm going to end you.”

Mick Foley: “What's your problem, Dolph?”

Dolph Ziggler: “My problem? My problem is people like you. People like Booker T. People like Goldust. Like Kevin Nash, Triple H, etcetera etcetera. People who should be showing up at awards ceremonies, throwback episodes of Raw, and little else, but somehow keep popping up in WWE rings on WWE television.”

Mick Foley: “Listen, D-”

Dolph Ziggler: “The observant among you will have noticed that I said people, not wrestlers. That's because I am a wrestler and I am out here representing wrestlers. I am not a relic of a time gone by. I am not a legend finding convenient ways to grab a paycheck every few months. I am not “the last of an era” that refuses to die. I am damn good, I deserve respect and I will not have has-beens crowding center stage.”

Mick makes a gesture to Dolph asking if it's okay to respond.

Dolph Ziggler: “No. I don't want to hear what the hardcore legend has to say. This isn't the first time I've told you that you do not belong here. I didn't come out here to have a conversation or a quick chat. I came out here to deliver an ultimatum. I am about to become the WWE Champion and mine is just weeks away from being the face that represents this company. I will be the main attraction. No more legends. No more movie stars. No more Mick Foley.”

The crowd jeers at Ziggler.

Dolph Ziggler: “Your 'John Cena: This is your life' segment was among the worst wastes of time I have ever seen in this business, and that's saying something. In its place, two young guns should have been duking it out in this ring proving to the world that they're worth a damn. Instead, we had an out-of-shape, out-of-touch Mick Foley trying to coerce fans to cheer for John Cena.”

There's a low roar as the crowd gives a mixed reaction to the mention of Cena.

Dolph Ziggler: “Here's the thing, though, Mick... John Cena didn't need your help. You know in your heart that you were putting yourself over that night. And tonight you're doing the same thing. What kind of future champion would I be if I allowed that to continue?”

Ziggler takes a moment to consider his next words.

Dolph Ziggler: “In seven weeks I will represent World Wrestling Entertainment as its champion and my WWE has no room for fossils. It's taken me six years to get to this point but damnit I have made it. I told myself when I was coming up and paying dues that if I ever had the chance to change things for the better, I would.”

Dolph pauses and looks at Foley eye-to-eye. Foley is listening intently.

Dolph Ziggler: “It's time do some 'spring cleaning' of my own. I want to be a WWE Champion who defends against the best wrestlers in the world. Money makes the world go round and right now your contract is eating up more than its worth. I want challengers that are hungry and really deserve it. As Champion-to-be I am making it my mission to balance the budget. You've got a wife and kids, so you get one warning. If you don't-”

Mick Foley: “I hate to cut you off, Dolph, but this is only a two hour program and as Commissioner, I still have a lot of things to do tonight. Production truck – if you could do me a solid...”

“I'm here to show the world, I'm here to show the world...” Dolph's music begins playing him out. He's smiling at Mick but you know he isn't happy. Ziggler turns to walk away.

Mick Foley: “Wait, wait, wait... cut the music.”

Ziggler stops dead in his tracks but doesn't turn around.

Mick Foley: “I'm glad you came out to say hi, actually. I got so caught up listening to your eloquent little speech that I almost forgot to pass on what Teddy Long told me... you're going to be teaming with Cody Rhodes to take on former tag team champions Booker T and Goldust on Smackdown this week.”

The crowd pops.

Mick Foley: “But you know what, Dolph, I don't think we should have to wait until Smackdown to see you 'show off.' I think the WWE Universe wants to the Royal Rumble winner in action tonight. I think the WWE Universe wants to see you in action against... John Cena.”

The crowd pops even louder. Ziggler turns, staring Mick down from the top of the stage.

Mick Foley: “And it just so happens I've got the power to make that happen.” (to the crowd) “What do you say?”

The crowd voices their approval unanimously. Dolph decides to leave before making things worse for himself. After he leaves, Mick Foley finishes up by letting the audience know he will be announcing the participants for the Raw Elimination Chamber at the end of the program. He leaves the ring and we get ready for the first match.

JINDER MAHAL vs. JUSTIN GABRIEL

Nice, short opening match. Mahal has a slight strength advantage over his opponent in the early going, but he gets distracted by the fans and gives Gabriel the opening he needs to turn it all around. Gabriel gets the crowd to roar for the 450 before obliging them.

Justin Gabriel wins via pinfall.

# COMMERCIAL BREAK #

When we come back from the commercial break, Justin Gabriel is walking through the backstage area. He happens upon Heath Slater heading the other direction.

Justin Gabriel: (under his breath) “Oh, great.”

Heath Slater: “Soooooooo?”

Justin Gabriel: “So what?”

Heath Slater: “Our tag team. Time to stop losing matches and start winning titles.”

Justin Gabriel: “Losing matches? I just won-”

Heath Slater: “Hey, can't talk! I got a match to get to.”

Heath gives Justin a light punch on the shoulder and takes off.

Justin Gabriel: “Who are you fighting?”

Heath Slater: “Dunno...” (trailing off) “...last minute...”

Gabriel continues walking toward the backstage area when he sees a producer walking around. He stops the producer and asks to look at his clipboard. He searches the page until he finds what he's looking for: Heath Slater's opponent. Gabriel laughs to himself and hands the clipboard back to the producer. Fade out to a video package detailing the history of the Elimination Chamber.

SIX BEGIN AND ONE CAN WIN.



THE ONLY SAFE THING TO DO



IS NOT GET IN.



ELIMINATION CHAMBER 2012
February 19 at the Bradley Center in Milwaukee, Wisconsin

It shows classic Chamber moments and features a speculative look at twenty-or-so of the top wrestlers that may be competing at the event. We return to ringside.

Michael Cole: “Folks, later on we'll have word from Mick Foley on who has been chosen to participate in the Elimination Chamber match for the WWE Championship, but right now it's time for a match everybody has been waiting for.”

Jerry Lawler: “Oh, stop it, Cole.”

Michael Cole: “I can't believe they're giving this away on television!”

Lawler sighs.

HEATH SLATER vs. MASON RYAN

This feels like more than just a throwaway match. Slater's bringing pent up hostility to this match and showing a more aggressive side. Mason Ryan, however, is a beast. He's a beast. And beasts destroy things. Slater wants to look dominant in this one but struggles to hold his own against the much larger Ryan. Mason ends its with the Pumhandle Slam.

Mason Ryan wins via pinfall.

Slater's groggy when he gets to his feet but he throws a tantrum nonetheless. Backstage, we see Justin Gabriel looking on and shaking his head with a smile on his face. Slater never had a chance.

# COMMERCIAL BREAK #

Vickie Guerrero: “I'm telling you, Jack, this is not a good idea!”

Camera fades in and we find Vickie Guerrero and Jack Swagger arguing backstage. Swagger is wearing his gear and has the United States Championship over his shoulder, ready for competition.

Vickie Guerrero: “You can't just open it up to anybody!”

Jack Swagger: “I know you don't agree with it Vickie but I need to do something. Nobody takes me seriously anymore. Nobody takes this title seriously anymore.”

Vickie Guerrero: “So you're going to go out there and lose it?”

Jack Swagger: “No, I'm going to go out there and become a big deal again. Who said anything about losing?”

Vickie realizes her slip and tries to backpedal.

Jack Swagger: “Save it, Vickie. I've got enough confidence for the both of us. Why don't you just stay backstage for this one.”

Swagger walks off and leaves Vickie speechless. Michael Cole admonishes Swagger for talking to Vickie that way but Lawler commends the U.S. Champion for showing some spine. Jack Swagger makes his way out to the ring as the announcer calls this an “open challenge for the United States Championship.” Jack Swagger holds the championship belt proudly above his head until his opponent's music hits.

Swagger looks like he regrets his decision until Reks and Hawkins reappear on Raw. Brodus has made it to the bottom of the ramp and is turning toward the steel ring steps when they blindside him and send him crashing into the apron. Brodus clutches his ribs as they bring him to his feet to throw him into the steps, causing a loud crashing sound. Swagger gets a microphone.

Jack Swagger: “Thank you.”

Hawkins and Reks take their attention away from beating on Brodus. Officials are showing up to tend to the fallen Funkosaurus as Swagger addresses his attackers.

Jack Swagger: “If I had to watch that fat mess jiggle around this ring one more time, I would have vomited. So thank you for dealing with that. But that leaves us with a problem, because I didn't come out here to stand around.”

Sensing this to mean Jack Swagger was extending this offer to anyone else, Tyler Reks steps forward to claim the opportunity. However, before he can do so, Curt Hawkins steps in front of him and enters the ring. Reks looks a little ticked off.

CURT HAWKINS vs. JACK SWAGGER
UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP – OPEN CHALLENGE

Swagger and Hawkins have a very athletic competition. Both men find themselves winded multiple times and Hawkins is using the most of his air time to prove his worth. He falls just short of defeating the United States Champion, however, who manages to counter a back body drop with his Gutwrench Powerbomb.

Jack Swagger wins via pinfall, retaining the U.S. Title.

Lawler and Cole discuss Swagger's victory without Vickie present as well as Hawkins and Reks' beef with Brodus Clay. They comment that Kelly Kelly was scheduled to make an appearance tonight but with Beth Phoenix's vicious assault at the Royal Rumble and Kane's attack on Eve, she does not feel that it's a safe working environment. Cole agrees with her and blames WWE's Board of Directors with not finding any lasting solutions to the leadership problems around here.

Lawler has to disagree, however, citing the old saying that 'anything can happen in the WWE.' It's not the safest place to work, he says, but it is the most rewarding. With that we segway to our next match.

THE MIZ, EPICO and PRIMO
vs.
R-TRUTH and THE USOS

Fun, fast paced match that sees The Miz doing work on The Usos then avoiding R-Truth. Epico and Primo use this match to convince the audience that tag team wrestling is not dead, pulling off back-to-back double team moves on R-Truth before The Miz manages to get in and finish things with the Skull Crushing Finale.

The Miz, Epico and Primo win via pinfall.

After the fun six-man tag, we head to the last commercial break of the evening.

# COMMERCIAL BREAK #

When we return from the commercial break, cameras in the parking lot catch a limousine pulling up and it's Zack Ryder sporting his serious face. We cut to John Cena for another pop as he makes sure his wristbands aren't too tight before getting ready for the main event.

# MAIN EVENT #

DOLPH ZIGGLER
vs.
JOHN CENA

Vickie Guerrero accompanies Dolph Ziggler to the ring after being noticeably absent during the show's opening. Dolph Ziggler manages to live through an Attitude Adjustment after Vickie puts Dolph's foot on the rope. The referee doesn't catch it and calls off the count. Cena gets a little frustrated, but moves on.

Cena smiles at Vickie, as though to say 'this is your fault.' He sets Dolph Ziggler up for another Attitude Adjustment but Ziggler wiggles free and manages to counter it into the Zig Zag! Cena kicks out at 2.99. The crowd pops and Ziggler is beside himself. He argues with the referee and then starts screaming at Vickie. Cena starts to regain some momentum and the match is in anyone's hands now.

The finish comes when Vickie Guerrero decides to get up on the ropes to 'more noticeable support' Dolph Ziggler. Cena gets up in her face and the crowd is cheering for him to clock her. Of course he isn't, but Ziggler almost does as he goes to blindside Cena but Cena dodges it. Ziggler catches himself on the ropes, preventing a collision between he and Vickie, but leaves an opening for John Cena to capitalize with another Attitude Adjustment and this one's over.

John Cena wins via pinfall.

A car crash sounds and Mick Foley comes out to personally congratulate John Cena in his victory over Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler gets to his feet and scowls at Mick. Vickie tries to console him but he screams at her and takes off, leaving her at ringside. She looks stunned for a moment and then hurries to catch up with him as he heads backstage.

Mick Foley: “Congratulations, John. That was a hell of a match.”

Cena thanks him as he catches his breath.

Mick Foley: “And its performances like this one that make it clear that you deserve to compete in the Elimination Chamber.”

There's a mixed reaction. Lots of kids in the crowd tonight.

Mick Foley: “But before we let all of the cats out of the proverbial bag, why don't we bring out our WWE Champion.”

The crowd cheers as “Cult of Personality” plays. CM Punk makes his way out to the ring with the WWE Championship fastened around his waist. He gets in the ring and shakes Mick Foley's hand. He smiles at John Cena and then raises the Championship above his head for a huge ovation.

Mick Foley: “Let's bring out our next contestant...”

Next up, the Elimination Chamber gets awesome with the addition of The Miz. He comes out to the ring and soaks in the hate.

The Miz: “You are looking at your next WWE Cham-”

Mick Foley: “Ok, we're all out of time. Next contestant!”

The Miz makes a boo boo face as Mick interrupts him to speed along the process. All the while, CM Punk is making faces behind The Miz's back to pass the time. 'The Truth shall set you free!' R-Truth comes out and gets in the ring, smiling wildly at The Miz, who looks none too happy about Foley's decision.

The Miz: “This is ludicrous. I just defeated him two matches ago and now he's getting the same opportunity as me? How do you justify that?”

R-Truth: “Maybe it's because R-Truth ain't a little Jimmy...”

The Miz: “Oh, here we go again with the little Ji-”

R-Truth: “-But it's probably because R-Truth ain't a little bitch!”

R-Truth and The Miz get in each other's faces before Mick talks over both of them.

Mick Foley: “And Mick Foley wouldn't be a man of the people if he didn't give the people what they want. So let's bring out contestant #5!”

The crowd absolutely erupts when Zack Ryder's theme song hits and Zack Ryder makes his way down to the ring. He looks like he's carrying himself a little, as though his injuries aren't entirely healed, but he looks much better than he did at the Rumble.

The Miz: “You're letting THIS GUY wrestle for the title? Really? REALLY?!”

Mick Foley: “Woo woo woo, you know it!”

Mick expects this to get a pleasant reaction from Zack, but Zack doesn't appear to be in a festive mood. He looks upset, and he looks upset with John Cena. Cena doesn't have a microphone but he starts to apologize to Zack again, regarding Kane's attack on Eve.

Mick Foley: “As much as I'd love to hear you guys clear the air, we're running out of time, and I think you're going to want to pay attention to my last decision.”

R-Truth and The Miz stop jeering at each other, Cena and Zack stop being emo, and CM Punk gives Foley his undivided attention.

Mick Foley: “Some people have accused me of going soft. Some people don't think I belong here. Let me remind you all that just because I am not competing in this ring, doesn't mean I've lost my love for creative violence. So while this decision may come as a controversial one, it can't be said that Mick Foley isn't here to do one thing and one thing only: give the people what they really want.”

Everyone looks a little confused besides Foley.

Mick Foley: “And without further ado, the last participant for the 2012 Elimination Chamber is...”

The lights go out for a moment. There's a lot of chatter amid the darkness. A few small “Y2J” chants start but they are quickly silenced by pyro exploding on the stage. The house lights turn red and the familiar tune of Kane's theme song begins. The Big Red Monster steps out from the curtains and stands at the top of the ramp. The lights stay deep red as CM Punk looks on at his largest challenger for the Elimination Chamber match. All the participants look around at each other as Raw comes to a close.

What if Natalya managed to win the Divas/Women's Championship, but because all the wrestlers have grown tired of her flatulence, the GM instituted “Doorknob rules” where another diva can call “doorknob” and essentially challenge her to a hardcore match for the belt? Bringing back the anytime, anywhere stipulation, Natalya could either defeat her opponent via pinfall/submission or nullify the match by touching a doorknob. This leads to Natalya carrying a doorknob with her at all times. Is that cheating? Yes. But there's nothing right about what's going on between her cheeks. The knob eventually becomes her gimmick weapon and her t-shirt reads 'a good knob is hard to find.' This isn't going to happen in my BTB, but it's fun to imagine.

LOL. Real WWE stopped the Brodus Clay stuff. The gimmick could get over with any wrestler. Flashy music, beautiful women? What's not to love? But it's a terrible gimmick for a clumsy giant that doesn't know how to dance. Hopefully they realize that and do things right the second time. Personally, I'm going to keep Brodus in the fold and see if we can't save this abortion of a character.

Anyways... the Elimination Chamber is around the corner. I'm choosing to leave things with about a week of solid buildup. I say solid because the first week was build in and of itself. My favorite is the build that isn't blatant, so I decided not to put it all out on the table in the first week. Still a few things to build up with three more shows before the pay-per-view. About to get many times busier in my personal life, so this may become even more sporadic but I'll try to make timely visits.

Also, no Chris Jericho. Huh. Wonder why that is...