QualitySoft

LAW Crowning of a Champion

The Introduction

Frankie gets up with a mic to open the show. A few hecklers start calling that they want the Flying Armadillo, as Frankie pretends he doesn’t know what they’re talking about. At least the gimmick gets people into it, even if he’ll never make for a serious threat to anyone.

Frankie: “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome! The Last Alliance of Wrestling proudly presents… Crowning of a Champion! Tonight, we will see the first ever LAW World Champion, with three semi-final matches. Everyone who did not lose last month will be in the semi-finals, including both Shawn Wright and Garrett Jaxx as a result of their drawn match. The winners will advance into tonight’s main event – a triple threat for the World Title! Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time to open the show – enjoy the Crowning of a Champion!”

Man, that guy’s got a bellowing voice on him that would put Jimmy Hart to shame. No wonder the crowd eats it up.

Overall: 62%
The Flying Armadillo gained overness from this segment.

Doug Delicious cuts a promo

I think he’s getting more into his gimmick, as he’s brushing his hair with a bright pink brush while he speaks.

Double D: “OK, boys and girls, you’re about to see what a real man looks like in action. Unlike my opponent Barry Hammond, who is overweight, and grotesquely ugly to boot! ‘Big Time’ indeed – the only thing big about that nasty man is his stomach. But not like me, me, Double D – I’m just ABSolutely delicious!”

Delicious rubs his abs on the ABSolutely, driving home the pun with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Well, I certainly want to punch him now, so we can assume that promo worked.

Overall: 48%
Doug Delicious gained overness from this segment.

Doug Delicious vs Big Time Barry Hammond

Delicious immediately hits Hammond with the brush to start with, which Big Time thankfully no-sells. I mean, a hairbrush? Good for getting heat, bad for fighting with. They go through a pretty slow paced match, and the crowd’s finding it a little hard to get into. But hey, this is only the opener. The idea is for the show to go uphill from here…. In theory, anyway. Delicious actually hits the Double Arm DDT, but won’t cover him. Double D heads outside to show off his pecs to a few ladies. You know, this gimmick would work better if he actually had a decent build, but I guess the humour value is in watching him delude himself. Delicious rolls back in and sizes up Big Time for another Double Arm DDT, but Hammonds shoves him off and mangles him in the corner with an avalanche. Hoisted up top, and one Superplex later, Big Time pins Double D to win it.

Crowd: 24%
Match: 64%
Overall: 44%

Shiro Yamada vs ‘Psycho’ Mike Legion, World Title Semi-Final

Out trots the good old “U-S-A” bandwagon as Yamada heads for the ring. As much as I personally hate it, the old evil foreigner bit does make him the most over guy on the roster. Legion tears into him right off the bat with a whole load of punches, then headbutts, then bites his fingers! The ref pulls him off, and Yamada takes control with some good chain wrestling, then picks Legion up and drops him on his head with a Murder Backdrop, another one of the moves I specifically asked him not to do. Prick. He tries one of those ungodly Japanese flying moves, with a spinning 720 diving moonsaulty type deal. It’s probably called the Flying Space Tiger Monkey Drop Slam, or something, but I haven’t the foggiest. Shiro gets a sunset flip, but gets seen using the ropes. The ref cautions him. Legion goes a step further in the illegal scale, grabbing a chair from ringside and braining Yamada with it. I really hope that hurt. Legion gets DQed and Yamada advances to the finals, as Legion runs around with the chair grinning like a maniac.

Crowd: 43%
Match: 74%
Overall: 58%

‘Smoothsteps’ Shawn Wright vs Garrett Jaxx, World Title Semi-Final

Wright comes out moonwalking his way to ringside. The crowd likes it. Jaxx doesn’t, so he cheapshots him from behind while Wright dances. Ain’t that always the way? Wright goes airborne, controlling with a handful of quick high-flying moves. He goes for a missile dropkick, but Jaxx rolls under it, drawing a nice pop from the crowd. Jaxx works over the knee, grounding Wright. They play it up a bit more, as Jaxx frantically curses while Wright struggles through. Wright fights back with a sudden dropkick, further jolting the knee. Jaxx works him over with a few shinbreakers.

He tries to end it with a Texas Cloverleaf, but Wright makes it to the ropes. Wright gets in a few comeback moves, knocking Jaxx down with a closeline. Thankfully, he’s got a good enough grasp of psychology not to dance on the injured knee. He goes for the Last Dance, but Jaxx pushes him into the ropes and picks him up for the Death Valley Driver – and quick as hell, Wright rolls off it into a crucifix for the pin, 1,2,3! Jaxx doesn’t even pause to acknowledge he’s lost, promptly hitting the DVD on Wright anyway. A man after my own heart. He spits on Wright before walking out. Unhygienic, but heelish.

Crowd: 38%
Match: 80%
Overall: 59%

Kurt Stryker vs Alexis Machine

An all-american badass vs the guy that teaches our children it’s good to play with fire. I guess this makes it a face vs face matchup, so the crowd have trouble deciding who to rally behind. I admit, this is really just here to put both guys on the card, but they’re both competent wrestlers, so why not? Stryker’s really more of a high-flier, but Machine doesn’t work like that, so they end up trading suplexes. Stryker nearly wins it, planting Machine with a textbook bridging German Suplex, but Machine grabs the ropes to break up the count. Stryker charges, but gets hot shotted and dropped throat first into the ropes. He turns around, right into a Lexis-Plex, and Machine then locks on the Breakdown for the submission win.

Crowd: 30%
Match: 74%
Overall: 52%

The Lost Boyz get some mic time

Azrael: “Ryan Wing… The so-called Canadian Sensation. Such a title is surely a sign of hubris…”
Gabriel: “Pride is a sin, young one. It comes before a fall, and the time to fall is now. Wing, you could not hope to face one Lost Boy, let alone both.”Azrael: “You shall falter, fail, and fall – for none can resist the power of lost souls such as us.”

I liked it a lot better with the less blatant Satanism. The crowd seemed to be wondering why they dropped it, after clearly showing they hated it last time. Fickle fans, but what am I gunna do about it?

Overall: 62%
The fans were confused by the gimmick change of Azrael (to Gothic) so soon after his last one. The fans were confused by the gimmick change of Gabriel (to Gothic) so soon after his last one. Azrael gained overness from this segment. Gabriel gained overness from this segment.

Ryan Wing vs Azrael vs Gabriel, World Title Semi-Final

Another one of those good old “Triple Threat that might as well be a handicap match” style matches. They always seem to go down nicely in my experience, and it got the crowd rallying behind Wing a little. Azrael and Gabriel beat the crap out of Wing, double-teaming him left, right, and center. Wing struggles to fight back, but the Lost Boyz hit the Unholy Roller without much trouble. Heel dissention time, as Azrael and Gabriel fight over who gets to take the pin and go on to the final. As per unviolatable wrestling tradition, they fight it out for a while giving Wing the chance to make his underdog comeback. The Lost Boyz finally take Wing down again, and Azrael goes up top as Gabriel holds Wing. Azrael’s faith is naturally misguided, as Gabriel shoves him off the top rope out to the floor! Nice bump. Gabriel looks a little concerned about his partner – and Wing promptly flips Gabriel into a Northern Lights Suplex for the 3 count.

Crowd: 35%
Match: 74%
Overall: 54%

Ryan Wing vs Shawn Wright vs Shiro Yamada, LAW World Title Match

I do wonder if I made a mistake booking two back to back triple threat matches, but the crowd doesn’t seem to mind. Wing is still lying in the ring as Frankie on commentary tries to push the point that he’s the underdog, as he’s just wrestled one match immediately before while Yamada and Wright got resting time. Yamada, being evil and all, takes advantage of this and beats Wing up early, not waiting for Wright to make his entrance. The crowd rallies behind Wing with more “U-S-A” chants. Hello? “Canadian Sensation”? I guess Yamada is the only evil foreigner, but I really question the sanity of wrestling fans sometimes.

Shawn Wright finally gets his ass into the ring, limping a little to sell the leg from his earlier match. Yamada chop blocks him and puts on a few of those weird rolling Japanese submissions. Wright looks close to tapping on an STF, but Wing breaks it up. Wing and Yamada trade some high-flying stuff. Yamada tosses Wing, and Wright catches the Last Dance out of nowhere on Yamada. He only gets two, though, because the ever lovely Shiro came to my office before the show and DEMANDED to kick out of a finisher or two tonight.

Yamada decides he hasn’t done enough yet, and busts Wright’s eyebrow open with a right hand, giving the crowd their blood fix for the night. Yamada potatoes him a few times, refusing to pull his punches. Christ, I’m surprised nobody in Japan shooted on this guy and injured him yet. Wing’s back into it, taking down Yamada and suplexing Wright onto the ropes. Wright recovers on the apron as Wing hits a Northern Lights Suplex on Yamada! 1,2, and Wright breaks it up with a springboard senton onto Wing, who’s in the bridge! SWANKY, and there’s a round of applause from the crowd for that spot.

All three guys fight up to their feet, and Wing takes a nasty bump as Yamada gives out ANOTHER Murder Backdrop. Wing’s more or less out to lunch. As the ref checks on him, Yamada promptly boots Wright directly in the nuts, cementing him as evil. All the “U-S-A” chants in the world won’t help now, as Yamada hits the Tiger Driver 91 on Wright to secure the 1,2,3.

An excellent match by indy standards. Shiro Yamada is now the first LAW World Champion, as easily the best worker on the roster. I just wish I could hire a big star who WASN’T a total prat.

Crowd: 43%
Match: 83%
Overall: 63%
The LAW World title has gained in image.

Overall: 55%
Match of the Night: Yamada vs Wright vs Wing, World Title
Worst Match of the Night: Double D vs Big Time Barry Hammond

I went back after the show and congratulated all the guys on another good show. Except Yamada, of course – he had left immediately. Hammond was amused the guys by putting on one of his god-awful rap efforts… I definitely need to get him doing that in front of a crowd sometime.

I pulled Ryan Wing aside, as he looked wobbly as hell.

“Ryan, you alright? You want me to take you down to the hospital or something?”

Wing shook his head, nearly collapsing with the effort: “No, no… I’ll be fine. I just got dropped right on my head – twice, actually. I need to lie down.”

“Hell, I’m sorry about that, Ryan. Shiro’s already left, but I’ll have a word with the bastard next time I-”

Wing: “Chase, it’s fine – after all, it was just an accident. It’s not like anyone goes into wrestling and deliberately tries to hurt the other guy. I’m sure Shiro didn’t mean it.”

I sighed. Wing was a nice guy, but pretty naïve. Shiro had spotted the best worker in the company, and taken him out before Wing could become a threat to his spot. Pure class.

Still, it had all gone pretty well. Lenart thought the show wasn’t any better than the last one, but attendance was up and we had a world champion now. Plus, we were financially healthy, pulling in another $5000.

I shouldn’t have done it, but I went and spent some of the profit, taking Sophie out dancing. She was happy we were succeeding, and hell – she’d done half the work anyway. I figured she deserved it. I assure you, my reasons were entirely noble, and had nothing to do with my desire to see her dressed up and shaking that body. And if you believe that, I have some lakefront property in the Sahara you may be interested in buying.

My lecherous nature aside, there was something interesting about Sophie. She was happy LAW was surviving, but she seemed to have a sad glint in her eye some of the time. Most people wouldn’t see it, but I’m a pretty perceptive guy when I’m looking for something. She knows more than she’s telling, and I think she knows that LAW is more than just another indy fed to me. LAW means more than that to her as well... I just wonder what.

Enhancer's Current Status:

ALPHA 0.01 finished