Dr. Giganto

I was all set to write a negative article this week when I realized "Wait, tomorrow's my birthday...I should be thinking happy thoughts!" So, instead, I'm going to be writing about the things in the 3 major sports that make me happy, and why I get such a thrill from watching sports.

Regarding baseball, I love the roll call at Yankee Stadium. I love the "Why Are You Gay?" song the bleacher creatures sing to fans of the opposing team when YMCA plays. I love hearing Frank Sinatra's "New York, New York" after a Yankees win. I love the fact that they play Liza Minelli's version after a loss. I love the "Voice of God" (Bob Sheppard). I love hearing Enter Sandman when Mariano Rivera enters a game. I love having a shish kebab and some tall boys across the street from the Stadium before the game. I love the "Moose Call" when Mike Mussina pitches. I love the cowbell guy in the right field bleachers. I love sitting in the stands for a day game. I love playoff games at night. I love games versus the Red Sox and Mets.

I love well-turned double plays and diving catches. I love 400-foot homeruns. I love the way a crowd rises to its feet when the home pitcher has two strikes and two outs. I love walk-off home-runs. I love the way the entire team rushes out to meet the winning run on a walk-off home-run. I love doubles into the gap. I love when a hitter keeps fouling off tough pitches with two strikes. I love sacrifice bunts and suicide squeezes. I love listening to Keith Hernandez announce Mets games. I love pinstripes. I love ivy walls. I love retractable roofs. I even love big green walls...

As for football, I love big hits. I love the draft. I love QB sacks. I love end-arounds and reverses. I love "gadget" plays. I love third and short. I love going for it on 4th down. I love field goals with no time left. I love Hail Marys. I love onside kicks. I love screen plays.

I love tight ends with soft hands. I love undersized players who are much tougher than they have any business being. I love Chad Johnson's TD celebrations. I love pulling linemen. I love ballhawking safeties. I love guys who play through injuries. I love the fact that Ronnie Lott had a finger amputated rather than miss a game.

I love Kansas City's red-clad fan base. I love disappointed and disillusioned Jets fans. I love Oakland's black hole. I love cheerleaders.

I love looking at point spreads. I love keeping track of my fantasy team. I love tailgating.

Basketball may have slipped down my list of priorities, but I still love it. I love alley-oop dunks. I love dunks in traffic. I love no-look passes. I love killer crossovers. I love superstars who find the open man. I love players diving for loose balls. I love blocked shots. I love buzzer-beaters. I love half court shots. I love little guys being knocked down and getting right back up. I love scrappy white guys. I love the dunk contest. I love pick and rolls.

I love March Madness. I love the conference championshop games. I love bench players for underdog teams interlocking arms at the ends of games. I love first round upsets. I love Cinderellas. I love the Princeton offense.

Basically, I love sports, and all the things I just mentioned are the tip of the iceberg. It would take me days to come up with all the things I love about sports.