 Life Experiences - Good, Bad, and Ugly
Expanding upon my past topic and going a bit further in a different direction, would you want to go back in time and change something bad that happened to you? Would you want to stop that school yard bully from giving you wedgies or make that first school girl rejection go a different way? My answer is no and let me tell you why.
I have had many bad events happen to me in my lifetime of a short 30 (31 in October) years.
When I was in grade school I can constantly remember being teased for being different. I was over weight and did not follow the usual kids and/or trends that were going around the class room. I wore my own style of clothing and pretty much kept to myself. For that I was teased and beaten up more than once. Would I change that? Hell no as it made me tougher and taught me the lesson of how to handle tough situations and turn things around where solutions are well within reach.
In high school I rarely dated. When I did I was mercilessly told that I was a “mercy” date and that the girl was only taken me because dates were required. This happened more than once. I was a heavy kid and increasingly shy when I started at this new school. Now as horrible as this might sound to remember you would think I would want to go back and tell that girl to go to hell but I don’t. The whole thing got me off my ass and I lost a lot of weight. I gained self confidence and a belief in myself and who I am where I will never let anyone, male or female treat me like that again.
When my wife and I first started dating we encountered a level of racism that struck me by surprise. In her country I was looked upon with suspicion as many Americans traveled there with less than honorable intentions and they had a less than high opinion of our culture. Over time though I was able to prove to her family the type of individual I was and the type of man and husband I would be in the future. In America however I have often encountered racial situations that have offended me greatly being part of an inter-racial couple. I have heard comments that I won’t repeat here that I would think disappeared years ago. Would I change anything about the way I handled this situations? No because it taught me to raise my children with the right knowledge and fortitude to handle themselves in these situations. Also it gave me more of a drive to see people more educated on how words can hurt people more than anyone realizes.
So in short my point to all this is that our life experiences make us who we are. If I were to go back and change something, good or bad, I would change who I am and what I’ve learned. Looking in the mirror today as a close to middle aged man, father, husband, and a damned fine person if you’ll forgive me for sounding conceited, I know that I was put through these situations to reach the level of understanding I am at this point in time.
Do I think I’ll stop learning now or going through horrible things? No I am sure things happen and there are many lessons ahead but that’s a part of life. A famous man once said “It’s not falling down that’s a crime. It’s not getting back up that is a crime.”
So…would any of you change anything that’s happened to you? |